AIBU to refuse apologising after being blocked in at Tesco?

[ThisIsAbsolutelyCrazy]

So, yesterday I go to Tesco with DH. DH is a wheelchair user and has a Blue Badge.

There were no disabled bays or parent and child bays so I went to a far corner of the car park where there were two empty rows of normal bays and parked between 2 bays so had room for DH to get in and out.

Lo and behold we came back to a car parked so close to my driver's side that I couldn't get between the cars - less than 10 inches in between. The car had parked over into the bay I had half parked in.

We were obviously WTF. The other bays around us were still empty.

Coming round to the front of the cars, we saw there was a young lad no more that 15-17 sitting in the passenger seat of the other car. He obviously couldn't get out of his door either because it was up against mine! I said 'what kind of idiot would park like this' or some such. He said 'my dad'. Then asked him why he'd blocked him in.as well. He didn't answer and just kept his head down. I will admit I did swear a bit saying for fucks sake, this is fucking disgusting. Then said 'tell your Dad he's a complete cunt'. At no point did I make threats to the lad or swear at him. I knew he didn't park the car.

Anyway I then climbed in through the passenger side, moved the car into the row in front, got DH in and we left.

The Dad had not come back. I'm kicking myself because I didn't take a picture of the way he'd parked.

Anyway, tonight at around 8pm there's a knock at the door and two policemen are there. My heart dropped because I thought it was about one of the DC (both were out with friends), but they said they'd had a complaint about me causing 'fear and alarm' to a minor!

Turns out the Dad must have already had my reg number and told the police what I'd said. No mention of how he'd blocked me deliberately and left his son trapped in the car!

He must have known whoever came back to the car would be angry!

Anyway police said I could make a formal apology to the boy and the matter would not be taken further - this was because I admitted swearing.

I said No I will not as I had figured out by then that the Dad had done this all deliberately. No clue who he is.

AIBU to think he must be an absolute psycho?

Especially to leave his son trapped in the car!

Theyve already tried to intimidate her and she wasn’t bothered. I’m getting the vibe she’s a post menopausal woman who has no shits to give anymore. Let them eat cunts.

Yes. We all get this. His dad shouldn’t have parked there. We know.

But you still didn’t need to use that language to his son. What a horrible thing to say to a teenager who is not at fault.

Probably why most new joiners leave within 5 years in our area.

Yes, the dad obviously parked to make a point-especially given your blue badge was displayed. However, your language when talking to the teenager was excessive. You can take the community resolution or risk having a nominal record or worse. Only you can decide if it’s worth it.

I went to park in a disabled space yesterday (blue badge, obviously), bloke was half over the space so I politely asked him to please move over, no swearing, I thanked him, end of story.

It was unwise Op but realistically I don't think that the police will waste time pursuing it.

I would have been frightened as a teenager if and adult was throwing out words like “cunt” to me just sitting in a car on my own . A blue badge doesn’t give you a license to be a threatening arrogant bully. I can’t believe the amount of people here defending the OP. How would they feel if this was their son or daughter in the car on their own .

Did you have your disabled badge displayed?

The correct response would have been to take a photo showing the entire empty row and him parked next to a car displaying a disabled badge, the post it on social media.

What you disabled was abuse a child who was not responsible for the car being there.

I think this is a very wise thing to do. When you know that you're doing something that is usually only done by selfish, arrogant, entitled idiots - and which generally infuriates other people - why wouldn't you want to make it abundantly clear to people that you are not one of them and that you are one of the very few who do have a very valid justification for parking like that?

You are the psycho. How was he to know why you parked like that? Telling the son his dad is a cunt? Can you hear yourself??

Poor kid. Having to deal with 2 belligerent adults.

Poor kid.

Even if she'd spoken calmly to the lad and said "I know it wasn't your fault, but could you please just let your mum or dad know for another time..." That way, assuming he told his dad, he - the one who actually chose to park that way - would have been chided and hopefully later felt stupid, with absolutely no shade on OP and thus no police coming to her door.

Sorry Op but I agree you were totally out of order, and that boy deserves an apology.

The car was displaying a blue badge so it’s really not a reasonable assumption that someone can just shuffle into the driving seat from the passenger side.

Oh come off it. Your first line - OP did nothing wrong. Oh yes they did. Calling someone a cunt in public is absolutely wrong, especially an innocent teenager and saying it about his Dad.

He could have looked at the blue badge and chosen not to block the drivers’ door ?

As a disabled person I'm shocked at the general response.
Hatch lines are on disabled bays are to allow a car door to open fully. I can only get out of my car if I do a 90 degree exit.
I have frequently been blocked in in days gone by if I have to use a normal space. The driver did not have enough room. We don't know if the DH could walk at all.
Cars are bigger and people don't notice the badges.
The OP would have had to lead her husband to the back of the vehicle and load him that way.

This man was disgraceful. How does it help to 'punish' another driver for parking to allow access? He just wanted a fight. I suspect the son recorded the exchange.
To send the police around was over the top.

Fwiw I witnessed someone pull up next to me in an empty car park last week and park in a disabled space. He swaggered off so I checked his dash, no badge. He had the whole carpark but couldn't be arsed.
Did I swear at him? No but I could have as is disgusting entitled behaviour. I did ask the other occupants where the badge was.
Yes I could have been stabbed (very dodgy looking) but when you spend your life discriminated against and in pain other people's ignorance is too much to bare.

I was fit and healthy for 40+ years. You never know what's around the corner.
Tbh if I was the OP and the police want to take further action I would be making a complaint regarding discrimination. It works both ways!

Yeah fair enough. I would have displayed the bb.

The point is that by reacting emotionally and aggressively, OP lost the upper hand and gave the other person the opportunity to do her over.

Like a lot of people, she’s clearly unable to regulate her emotions or control her reactions to adverse events. What she should’ve done is asked the kid who is driving and when they’re likely to be back, and if they can contact them, or say nothing and just do what she ultimately did to get out of the situation.

Instead she started swearing and calling people “a cunt”. As a result, she’s the one with the police knocking at the door and facing a caution, while the inconsiderate parker (who is ultimately the person in the wrong) is sitting at home playing victim.

Sorry but that doesn’t excuse speaking to a child in a car like that . The dad might not have even seen the blue badge either . There is nothing wrong excuse for being aggressive and rude to a child who is sitting on their own.

OP did nothing wrong - in response to a poster discussion her parking, calling her entitled etc. Not talking about her language (other than to threaten her because she’s have “more to worry about than the police”)

Comprehension, yes?

Then you take a photo and report him, or ask his teen to phone him; you don’t launch into a sweary rant at said teen.

"Then you take a photo and report him"

To who?

I’d have reported you too.

Who approaches a teenager in the passenger seat and starts ranting and swearing?!!

You are definitely in the wrong and need to sort out an apology asap.

Did I swear at him? No but I could have as is disgusting entitled behaviour. I did ask the other occupants where the badge was.

And he could have complained about you for being abusive. Not worth it. It’s possible to call out bad behaviour without swearing at them.

I’ve done that when a woman complained about me and my mum parking in a P&C bay (all the BB bays were full). I told her to look at the BB on display and stop making useless comments. She hid behind her husnand 🙄