AIBU to refuse apologising after being blocked in at Tesco?

[ThisIsAbsolutelyCrazy]

So, yesterday I go to Tesco with DH. DH is a wheelchair user and has a Blue Badge.

There were no disabled bays or parent and child bays so I went to a far corner of the car park where there were two empty rows of normal bays and parked between 2 bays so had room for DH to get in and out.

Lo and behold we came back to a car parked so close to my driver's side that I couldn't get between the cars - less than 10 inches in between. The car had parked over into the bay I had half parked in.

We were obviously WTF. The other bays around us were still empty.

Coming round to the front of the cars, we saw there was a young lad no more that 15-17 sitting in the passenger seat of the other car. He obviously couldn't get out of his door either because it was up against mine! I said 'what kind of idiot would park like this' or some such. He said 'my dad'. Then asked him why he'd blocked him in.as well. He didn't answer and just kept his head down. I will admit I did swear a bit saying for fucks sake, this is fucking disgusting. Then said 'tell your Dad he's a complete cunt'. At no point did I make threats to the lad or swear at him. I knew he didn't park the car.

Anyway I then climbed in through the passenger side, moved the car into the row in front, got DH in and we left.

The Dad had not come back. I'm kicking myself because I didn't take a picture of the way he'd parked.

Anyway, tonight at around 8pm there's a knock at the door and two policemen are there. My heart dropped because I thought it was about one of the DC (both were out with friends), but they said they'd had a complaint about me causing 'fear and alarm' to a minor!

Turns out the Dad must have already had my reg number and told the police what I'd said. No mention of how he'd blocked me deliberately and left his son trapped in the car!

He must have known whoever came back to the car would be angry!

Anyway police said I could make a formal apology to the boy and the matter would not be taken further - this was because I admitted swearing.

I said No I will not as I had figured out by then that the Dad had done this all deliberately. No clue who he is.

AIBU to think he must be an absolute psycho?

Especially to leave his son trapped in the car!

I’m sure a 17 year old boy has heard worse. I would put in a counter complaint about the father deliberately blocking you in.

Why? Do you not realise that disabled people are out and about, and take up space. When I see something “out of the norm” but that has a perfectly reasonable explanation, I’ll assume that’s the explanation and get on with my life. If I really want to take time out of my day to be bothered by it then I’d check for a blue badge and satisfy myself than I was right, this is just a disabled person living their life.

Are you like those people that think disabled spaces should only be enforced from 9 till 5 because disabled people wouldn’t be out after 5 if they’re really disabled? Or you get annoyed if they are given anything extra in life to create equality between them and everyone else?

Well you were aggressive and verbally abusive to a child, who was blameless. Just vile behaviour and rightly called out.

You could have just parked perpendicular to the bays if it was genuinely empty rows; you see big vans( the sort with baskets or Winchester attached do this ).

Parking between 2 bays looks like you are entitled and self important.

Exactly. And how exactly can this go any further?? What did the police say were the actual grounds for what might happen if you don't apologise (ooh - dramatic music 🤣)

I am not usually one to say this but thank God the police are dealing with the real criminals and not wasting time...... 🙄 I'm sure all the victims of violence etc are thrilled

Knew it was going to be man that did that that, very passive aggressive. Did you display your disabled badge? teenage boys 🙄 did not ring the police, it was the dad being an entitled knob. Personally I wouldn’t apologise.

Well now you know better than to assume.

Presumably you wouldnt deliberately make it difficult for them to re enter the car by parking deliberately close.

Hopefully this thread has highlighted something (I have had my eyes opiened before on MN on things I had never considered)

ETA - you cpuld also check the dashboard for a badge if you are that bothered

Of course it was deliberate from the bloke, half empty and parked right up next to her? Why is everyone being so much on their high horse and just telling her off for the swearing. He absolutely will have said that'll show them because why else would he have parked like that and, some people do like to show others a lesson and show off to their teenage kids, the dad very likely did take the reg. Op you were wrong to swear and even talk to the lad really, that's what they were wanting, to wind you up and call the police. Can't you say to the police they must apologise for blocking you in in the first place with a disabled badge? Which I assume was on display and therefore idiot dad should have clicked why youd parked like that and just left you alone.

What you need to understand is that the other person didn't know why you had taken up two bays.

I'd be really cross if you spoke to me child like that.

OP and the dad both sound rough. What an area to live in.

Without excusing OP being blocked in, if there was 20 empty spaces in the row OP parked there was no need to park across 2 bays.

And no excuse for taking it out on the kid, either.

….but if you haven’t seen the Blue Badge then someone else may assume you’d observed like a twat….

Op, people behave badly all the time. You cannot be aggressive and confrontational though. Yes he parked badly, but your abusive reaction was ott and wrong too.

Didn't they have the disabled badge in the car? So it was obvious...

And what Dad leaves their ‘child’ cough cough 17 year old in that situation, no words! lol

Of course not. People are so quick, so desperate to be outraged and angry they dont stop to think or check....

State of the world.

Imagine if it had been another passive aggressive man that had a knife etc. just silly behaviour.

Maybe you need to learn to read -

There were no disabled bays
So I went to a far corner of the car park

How then was the dad supposed to know the other guy was in a wheelchair? Idiot as he is for reporting op. Idiot as SHE is for telling a child to tell his dad that he's a cunt.

And no I don't know the ins and outs of disability parking laws, I imagine very few people do. But I do have plenty of consideration for other people, eg when out and about walking, I will always be the first to move out of the way, and to me that's more important than being able to recite section 1 paragraph 252 blah blah.

Poor kid this is nothing he to do with him

I regularly forget what words like very or there start with. Also have the joy of dyslexia amd obviously autocorrect or auto dictate don't pick it up.

How would you feel if someone was aggressively shouting and swearing at your kids for something you had done? Especially the c word was totally uncalled for yes his parking was rubbish your reaction was disproportionate and directed at the wrong person

Pretty tame???
I hope you're nowhere near my Tesco if you think this is pretty tame.
You are the psycho in this story.

Poor kid, having an idiot for a dad and then having you swear at him, telling him to tell his dad he’s a c* is awful. Stuck between two adults who should know better. Massive overreaction from you and you do owe the young lad an apology.

Imagine telling a child that their dad is a cunt. What kind of scumbag does that?

Second post I’ve read this week about grown adults using the most foul language I thought possible at innocent people.
YABU. You should apologise.

Absolutely, showing dad was a total idiot whether he saw it or not.