AIBU to think being wealthy is vastly overrated?

[ForLoudBrickMember]

I know this will sound really out of touch and I apologies in advance if I offend anyone, but I’ve been reflecting on my life recently and I truly think it is the most overrated thing on the planet. I’m 35, total pre tax income of about £2 million with half coming from working as a partner oncologist in the states and half coming from active investing. DH makes slightly more, total household income of about £5 mil. Now I’ve done it I can say the following;

1. It feels totally normal.
2. It is incredibly isolating
3. The pressure/difficulty is intense. Ours are still far too young for this and trying to avoid it but it’s very common the DC face intense pressure/stress.
4. So so much sacrifice. I left everything behind in the UK, put off DC until late, missed out on so much etc.
5. Being average isn’t much worse. People earning the average wage can still afford a comfortable house, decent car, food, occasional holiday etc. Mum was completely broke as a child and even that would’ve been fine if she didn’t make brain dead decisions constantly.

Yet the average person seems to believe it’s endless bliss, no stress and every rich person is a genius who never tires and never feels sad. AIBU?

@ForLoudBrickMember I’m interested in how you think you’ve “sacrificed so much” and specifically mention having children later - you’re 35 with two young children, where now the average age of first child IS (around) 35. Most of my friends and I haven’t been able to start trying for children until 36/37 due to financial constraints so you’re actually ahead of most there as well.
So you probably were earning decent money at a much younger age and could’ve tried for children earlier but you were ambitious and wanted a career / money. Now you’ve realised it’s not what you thought it would be would you go back and change your decision if you could?

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

Really? As an Oncologist?

Here in the UK being average means NHS. For my husband that means 8 months of waiting in excruciating pain for a specialist and then being put on an indefinite hold.

You can buy medical care if you’re wealthy.

These societies have very strong social ties.
Communities with less money often focus on family and traditions instead of buying things. This avoids the stress of chasing wealth.

@ForLoudBrickMember why don't you use your wealth and your training to provide your services as an oncologist to a charity or other organisation that provides health care to people who can't afford it in the US rather than continue to make money that you don't need?

Also this. I’m 32 and haven’t had kids yet because we can’t afford to.

Donate ?

Really? Sorry, you must have inherited or similar.

UK medical degree, then some experience would NOT leave you in a position to retire.

35 and a consultant level partner is just about plausible.

Im out, your talking nonsense.

Obviously money matters up to a point - life is much better if you have a stable income, enough money to cover the bills, and enough in savings to feel secure, but beyond that haven’t studies shown that it makes little difference to happiness?

Not quite. Studies do show a declining link between wealth and happiness after a certain point. But that point is way above just being able to afford the basics.

I think that's it. I work somewhere where millionnaires and working class co-exist quite happily. It's only when the odd nouveau riche joins and who brags about their multi-million pound house that things get boring.

This isn't even a funny troll post

"Yet the average person seems to believe it’s endless bliss, no stress and every rich person is a genius who never tires and never feels sad."

Really? Every "average" (not wealthy) person believes that having money means you never get tired or feel sad? This is utter nonsense, I don't know where you get this from.

It must be so difficult OP. My thoughts are with you during this difficult time. But firstly . . . are you OK?

If you feel the need to relieve yourself of this burden, I can step in and take some of it off your hands. I can only take half a million or so . . .

PM me chick . . .

Wealth gives you choices. I would rather be miserable with money than without it

What an absolute twit... 🙄

Exactly. Money is at the root of so many day to day problems and worry.

This is a complex issue and doctors compensation is only a small part of it. I don’t feel guilty at all.

Also please keep in mind the following;

1. I live in an undesirable area which leads to more pay, similarly I am a partner. Salaried in a desirable area will pay like half as much. Academic salaried at a top hospital maybe a quarter or less.
2. All the top jobs here pay a lot more. You just wouldn’t be able to get anyone intelligent, hard working etc to do the job if the pay was the same as in the UK.
3. The standards are very high which drives up cost. The average American would have a mental break down in an NHS hospital.
4. Most patients have some form of insurance. In particular elderly and very poor are covered by the government

That isn’t to say it’s perfect of course, but it’s not just because it’s a private system.

All the people on this thread saying, 'you've worked hard for your welath, well done'.

Do they really think poorer workers don't work hard?

@ForLoudBrickMember the one bit I feel for you is moving away from family and friends. I'm clear in my head this is something I would never do, no amount of wealth is worth it to me to sacrifice family and friends. Now you've made your fortune, surely you could move back? Otherwise what's the point in wealth. Wealth should buy choices and options.

Money doesn't make you happy, it does allow you to be miserable in comfort.

Dh is on the corporate ladder, so many colleagues over the years strive for wealth then retire either very sick or with zero hobbies/friends that they die in a few short years. Or just dying too young. Really sad.

I've encouraged him to step back from working so much, told him I was worried he'd end up the same, he now has the most balance he's ever had, time with family and friends, nice holidays, and some very expensive hobbies that he thoroughly enjoys.

We were at one of the events to do with one of his hobbies last weekend, I said there are men (99% were men) here who are just here because they want everyone to know they have the best/most expensive car in this space, while we're here for a nice day out, he totally agreed. It was my way of reminding him why he's doing this hobby as there was a lot of temptation on display to upgrade which he said himself wouldn't make him much happier.

No plans to retire, I like my job and would get bored. I could have retired ages ago before I even started specialist training.

Absolutely. You were very polite.

What a dreadfully tasteless post. Us "normal average" folk live pay check to pay check. I have to watch every single penny. This post is frankly offensive

Maybe doing some good with the money would help you feel better?

When I think why the hell am I working I pay for a stray cat to be neutered and I think I have done something meaningful