Threw water at my DP, was I justified

[Beestings1]

I feel bad for doing this, it’s really out of character for me but I did it instinctively and out of shock. I was stood up pouring some water from the sink on my lunch break, DP backed up against me so his bum was touching mine and he broke wind. I turned around and swilled him with water. I know it was wrong but the disrespect and shock made me angry in that moment.

He is now saying I was out of order and isn’t accepting my apology.

He deserved that

Why do you have to apologise .. what he did was appalling ! Where’s your apology from him !

He's a disgusting pig.

Throwing water wasn't ideal, kicking the arsehole out of your life might have been better.

you did the right thing

So he farted and you snapped…?

He was revolting, you were fine given the revolting circumstances, and he is the one who should apologize. Eeew.

I'd have just waited until I was ready to fart back, but I am in the minority on MN who is human and farts.

I almost clicked you were being unreasonable because you said you apologised. No way I'd be apologising for responding to that kind of grimmery with a bit of water, the very least he deserved, the pig.

I'm not uptight about farting. DP and I fart in front of each other without embarrassment.

I still think that what the OP's husband did was disgusting.

BUT, even if I would have found it funny for my own DP to do that to me, it's still ok for the OP not to like it and it's ok for her to act instinctively and chuck water over her husband (I'm not going to abbreviate to DH because the D doesn't suit him).

He shouldn't be turning it around, playing the victim and expecting her to apologise.

Interesting

people can press their arses up against a partner without consent and fart on them and that’s fine ….

Awful common (literally) toilet behavior. I’d probs have chucked a full kettle at him.

I bet he did well at school. Top of the class was he? (Not!)
Dreadful man. What a prince you’re married to.

He is a pig. You shouldn’t have apologised.

The battershittery came early on this thread I see, a few fart apologists out tonight.

What an utter arse, literally. Please dont start questioning your reaction OP. Is he normally like this? Does he have form for disrespecting you?

He has had the odd moment, a couple of comments when we’ve been out at restaurants for example, but never repeated once I’ve told him they upset me.

Haha was waiting for that comment

Surely he would know whether you find this sort of thing funny? Has he done it before? If not, why now? If not why is he pissed off at you acting out of character in response to him acting out of character?

Someone had to say it 🤣

Tbh I probably would have done exactly the same If my partner deliberately backed up against me, farted on me and thought it was funny, getting a bit of water thrown at him would be the least of his worries.

No, people may instinctively throw water at someone who has just done something really disgusting and demeaning to them. Something that amounts to the legal definition of assault.

No, he did the oven thing in bed once and got given what for. So he knows it’s not my type of humour.

The oven thing?

It's called a Dutch Oven (Lord only knows why), when somebody farts under the duvet and then holds the other persons head under there, so they are forced to endure it. I have heard of this, but never personally experienced it. Had any previous partner ever done this, it would have been an instant binning off offence. No question.

Reactive abuse surely

Jesus. He sounds revolting. Poor you.

OP: This is highly illegal.

You should not be in a relationship with a ten year old boy.

Disrepectful and not at all funny. And I’m a bloke.