AIBU to keep reporting my sister over concerns for her children?

[Pipiscoming2023]

I live the other side of the country to my brother and sister, but keep in touch regularly with my brother and his family. My sister, however, doesn’t reply to any of my texts, won’t see me whenever I’m that way visiting etc.

The issue is she’s an alcoholic and she’s constantly in trouble. Shes 28 and has 4 kids, one of which is a new baby, and she’s back on the drink (and my brother thinks drugs too).

I get screenshots sent to me by one of my cousins who also lives near them, of things my sister is saying, videos of her drunk and fighting, just all the worst things.

My biggest worry is for those children. Both our parents were addicts and ended up dead before we were teenagers. I know how this goes. But my sister is refusing any kind of support from me (I’ve offered to take her to meetings, drs, just sit and have a cup of tea and a chat, everything).

It all came to a head earlier this year when I’d heard she was blind drunk the day after taking her new baby home and I decided to anonymously report her via crime stoppers. I felt awful but social services came over and by the sounds of it nothing was done.

She has since been out almost every weekend, keeps dropping the baby off at random peoples houses (according to my brother - she won’t let him have her because he’s so judgy she said), and last weekend ended up in a fight in front of her kids that led to a split lip and black eye.

Would IBU to keep reporting her? I know I’m not the only one that has but nothing seems to be happening. There must be a huge case spanning years, so why aren’t social protecting those children? And what can I do?

I agree with everything you said, but none of it means the poster I quoted is right!

I can’t understand why the Op is the one gathering the evidence and writing a timeline…. When she lives long distance and everything she knows is second hand from relatives.

Surely your relatives who live close and see this with their own eyes are the ones that should have already done this, but give they haven’t… be the ones to do it now.

Yes please keep reporting her to SS & the school. You have to be advocate for those children if you think they aren't being cared for properly or are in danger.. You can also ask the Police to do a welfare check if you think she's fighting or drinking in front of the children. They will turn up unannounced & refer to other agencies if necessary. We have a duty of care to all children & if you didn't report her can you imagine how you'd feel if anything happened to those babies.

@Pipiscoming2023

What a horrible situation, OP.

Well done. I hope something happens soon.

Please update when you can OP.

Sorry if this has been said already- you, your cousin and your brother need.to report to the safeguarding lead at the school, as well as ss every time

I’d take this as far as I could. And start with an MEQ to the council and CC the local councillors, asking for a full investigation into what has been done to safeguard the children as multiple reports have been made. And seemingly no action taken. It needs to be looked into thoroughly and brought to the forefront of SS attention before there is a tragedy. Local authority workers are often only responsive once an MEQ has been raised or councillors or external authorities are grilling them. Sadly. It’s due to being too understaffed and underfunded to stretch.

You know you should be reporting her but it’s so hard when it’s your dsis. I had a similar situation not involving dc but my dsis financially abusing dm so I empathise with you. I had tried to give advice etc but eventually report dsis to opg but in my head I reframed it as I am raising my concerns to the people who are qualified to deal with this and who aren’t emotionally involved in the situation

Keep reporting. You can love your sister but you have to protect your nieces and nephews as they’re more vulnerable