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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to think if we need to politely ask men not to rape women (or men), then we don't want such people in the UK?

773 replies

bobbyydazzler · 19/08/2026 20:26

Don't rape, sexually assault or make kissing noises' at people, asylum seekers warned in guidance about living in UK
UK arrivals have been told to treat women equally, not sexually assault partners or have sex with children in a new Home Office pamphlet. As well as the guidebook, a series of posters have also been designed by the government.

https://news.sky.com/story/asylum-seekers-warned-not-to-make-kissing-sounds-at-people-in-new-guidance-about-living-in-uk-13574744

OP posts:
Thread gallery
34
Tiggy2000 · 20/08/2026 11:11

Leapintothelightning · 19/08/2026 20:49

Sooo 74% were British nationals?
yeah sounds like an immigration issue…

It is an immigration issue, as the data shows that immigrants are disproportionately represented as perpetrators of these type of sexual offences. Many of these men have no understanding of accepted levels of behaviour in the UK. I appreciate many indigenous men are also a problem, the difference is that indigenous men know it’s wrong, but ignore the law, where many immigrants don’t see what the issue is, as the law and expectations here in the UK, and in the West in general, are often very different to where they come from.

StandingDeskDisco · 20/08/2026 11:12

bobbyydazzler · 19/08/2026 20:45

Some basic data from the MoJ

'Data from the Ministry of Justice (MoJ), obtained by the the Centre for Migration Control think tank under freedom of information laws, has revealed that 26% of 1,453 sex assault convictions on women last year were foreign nationals.
Indian nationals accounted for the highest number in foreign national convictions in 2024, with 38.
Romanians nationals were second with 27 assault, joint with Polish nationals also on 27.
Pakistani nationals accounted for 20 sexual assault conviction while 19 Afghan nationals were convicted.

While accounting for 26% of sexual assault convictions last year, foreign nationals make up 10.9% of the population.
More than a fifth of all rape convictions last year were also foreign nationals.
They made up 155 of the 720 convictions for “rape of a female aged 16 or over”, with a further 42 convictions being an “unknown” nationality.'

There are examples in the news every day. And yes before you say but british men rape too, yes we know. We don't need more.

This data is about convictions.
I bet that courts/juries are more ready to convict foreign nationals, hence the higher % relative to population.
With British men being accused, it often descends into 'he said / she said' and conviction rates are abysmally low.

Always read statistics with your wits about you and look for the gaps.

Sprogonthetyne · 20/08/2026 11:14

bobbyydazzler · 19/08/2026 20:49

Don't rape children? You think your ever day British bloke needs to be guided not to rape children?

Unfortunately yes. I certainly started receve sexual harassment from around age 12, sometimes when in school uniform. This was a small town in the 90, so almost exclusively British nationals.

As I've got older my faith in men has only dropped lower then this gutter high start point.

NancyThompson · 20/08/2026 11:16

Screamingabdabz · 20/08/2026 10:07

You won’t change deeply ingrained misogynistic attitudes, no. But you can remind them quite forcefully about abiding by the law. I think this leaflet is a good thing.

But we don't. Sentencing is derisory, no wonder they take it as licence to do their worst.

Mumterz · 20/08/2026 11:23

LakieLady · 20/08/2026 10:33

I really don't think the UK needs to follow the example of a country that has elected a demented giant Cheeto as their president, tbh. And elected him twice!

God knows, we've had some pisspoor PMs in recent years, but none in that league.

Him being a bad person doesn't change whether the policy was good or not. It's at least something.

myusernamewastakenbyme · 20/08/2026 11:25

We are allowing men to enter this country that believe girls marrying at the age of 9 is acceptable.
What can possibly go wrong😬.

Somerford · 20/08/2026 11:28

This video is approximately three minutes long and gives you a good idea of how men from certain other cultures think about raping women:

"what about the consequences of raping a woman though?" Asks Ross Kemp, "what about the impact on her?"

"Well yes, she might scream and wake somebody up. Or we might get an STI"

- YouTube

Enjoy the videos and music that you love, upload original content and share it all with friends, family and the world on YouTube.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WimzA4DYuxc

Mumterz · 20/08/2026 11:29

Sprogonthetyne · 20/08/2026 11:14

Unfortunately yes. I certainly started receve sexual harassment from around age 12, sometimes when in school uniform. This was a small town in the 90, so almost exclusively British nationals.

As I've got older my faith in men has only dropped lower then this gutter high start point.

Life for 12 year old girls is worse in Kabul, Khartoum and Mogadishu. Yes you were SHed. That's disgusting and horrible and vile. Girls in Sudan face rape by armed paramilitary groups. It's not comparable.

OopsThatWasExcessive · 20/08/2026 11:31

Mumterz · 20/08/2026 09:35

That's only for low skilled labour though. If you move for a corporate high skilled career, life can be very good for you. And not everyone on the lower rungs are abused.

Edited

oh, that's alright then... 😣

I can't believe you wrote that!

EmeraldShamrock000 · 20/08/2026 11:31

Somerford · 20/08/2026 11:28

This video is approximately three minutes long and gives you a good idea of how men from certain other cultures think about raping women:

"what about the consequences of raping a woman though?" Asks Ross Kemp, "what about the impact on her?"

"Well yes, she might scream and wake somebody up. Or we might get an STI"

Says it all. Wow. Clearly they have a very different outlook on the consequences to us, no matter how many times people shout “white men rape too”.

Mumterz · 20/08/2026 11:34

OopsThatWasExcessive · 20/08/2026 11:31

oh, that's alright then... 😣

I can't believe you wrote that!

I did!

MaturingCheeseball · 20/08/2026 11:35

I have seen several cases where the defendant - or at least his representative - has used ignorance of the law as an excuse.

In one case a man from Iraq having surgery in a London hospital pushed a passing woman into a cupboard and raped her and the defence was he had a sheltered upbringing and didn’t know that women outside the family weren’t “available”.

One of the Brighton beach rapists freely admitted to thinking there was no difference between sex and rape.

And yet all these men are permitted to wander freely here with no background checks in addition to views that are majorly at odds with our society.

Thegreatwhitestillalive · 20/08/2026 11:36

Mumterz · 20/08/2026 09:35

That's only for low skilled labour though. If you move for a corporate high skilled career, life can be very good for you. And not everyone on the lower rungs are abused.

Edited

I think it's also important to point out that it is illegal, MOHRE investigates and most importantly... As much of modern slavery anywhere, it is done predominantly by their own countrymen. You can very clearly see the behaviour based on caste from management to workers

SomethingHasGotToBeDoneAboutYourKids · 20/08/2026 11:38

StandingDeskDisco · 20/08/2026 11:12

This data is about convictions.
I bet that courts/juries are more ready to convict foreign nationals, hence the higher % relative to population.
With British men being accused, it often descends into 'he said / she said' and conviction rates are abysmally low.

Always read statistics with your wits about you and look for the gaps.

If you look at my post at 10:26 today I posted a spreadsheet analysing the data a PP provided for both prosecutions and convictions by percentage of UK population for each ethnicity.

Mumterz · 20/08/2026 11:41

MaturingCheeseball · 20/08/2026 11:35

I have seen several cases where the defendant - or at least his representative - has used ignorance of the law as an excuse.

In one case a man from Iraq having surgery in a London hospital pushed a passing woman into a cupboard and raped her and the defence was he had a sheltered upbringing and didn’t know that women outside the family weren’t “available”.

One of the Brighton beach rapists freely admitted to thinking there was no difference between sex and rape.

And yet all these men are permitted to wander freely here with no background checks in addition to views that are majorly at odds with our society.

I think it was a Qatari and a toilet cubicle. Disgusting though.

Somerford · 20/08/2026 11:52

StandingDeskDisco · 20/08/2026 11:12

This data is about convictions.
I bet that courts/juries are more ready to convict foreign nationals, hence the higher % relative to population.
With British men being accused, it often descends into 'he said / she said' and conviction rates are abysmally low.

Always read statistics with your wits about you and look for the gaps.

The British state has just spent decades colluding with Pakistani men and covering up their crimes as they raped and tortured tens of thousands, possibly hundreds of thousands of British girls. We don't need you to "bet" on the things that the apparatus of our rotten state will or will not do to skew the figures when it comes to foreign rapists.

StandingDeskDisco · 20/08/2026 11:54

SomethingHasGotToBeDoneAboutYourKids · 20/08/2026 11:38

If you look at my post at 10:26 today I posted a spreadsheet analysing the data a PP provided for both prosecutions and convictions by percentage of UK population for each ethnicity.

I can only read the second sheet, the first is small and fuzzy.
There is something odd about the second sheet. Looking at the row for white British, number of prosecutions per 10k population is 0.6702, but number of convictions is 0.6897. How can convictions be higher than prosecutions?

I note that there are not columns for for conviction and prosecution rates relative to the size of the population for each ethnicity, only relative to total population, so the vital data is actually missing.

LakieLady · 20/08/2026 11:57

JHound · 19/08/2026 22:58

I have read the number of foreigners meant they nationals is higher than that but that by the side I am very shocked that the top three are Indians, Poles and Romanians as that is not how the press presents it?

That's a good lesson in not believing all you read in the papers (and other media), isn't it?

I've often been told some shocking thing, usually by my mother in law, done a bit of fact checking, and found out it's an interesting mix of half-truth and utter bollocks. When I discuss it with her, and point out that there were errors, incorrect conclusions, stats misleadingly presented etc, she just shrugs and says "Oh, I didn't know that".

Fuck knows where she gets her news from.

StandingDeskDisco · 20/08/2026 11:59

Somerford · 20/08/2026 11:52

The British state has just spent decades colluding with Pakistani men and covering up their crimes as they raped and tortured tens of thousands, possibly hundreds of thousands of British girls. We don't need you to "bet" on the things that the apparatus of our rotten state will or will not do to skew the figures when it comes to foreign rapists.

I was talking about the willingness of the jury to convict once it comes to trial, not about the behaviour of the police or CPS.

EasternStandard · 20/08/2026 12:05

LakieLady · 20/08/2026 11:57

That's a good lesson in not believing all you read in the papers (and other media), isn't it?

I've often been told some shocking thing, usually by my mother in law, done a bit of fact checking, and found out it's an interesting mix of half-truth and utter bollocks. When I discuss it with her, and point out that there were errors, incorrect conclusions, stats misleadingly presented etc, she just shrugs and says "Oh, I didn't know that".

Fuck knows where she gets her news from.

Are you ok with the system as it is? When there’s crimes occurring as we can’t check backgrounds properly is it a price worth paying? in your view

NancyThompson · 20/08/2026 12:10

OopsThatWasExcessive · 20/08/2026 11:31

oh, that's alright then... 😣

I can't believe you wrote that!

If you're talking about workers in the Gulf, the reality is that those jobs represent the best opportunity they will ever have - the failing lies with their home countries.

LakieLady · 20/08/2026 12:12

Justanopinionnothingmore · 19/08/2026 22:30

Also maybe they need to hand out these leaflets in schools too. Teach the boys here too! In fact give them to any man.

I certainly think issues around consent should be covered in PSE or whatever it's called this week.

NancyThompson · 20/08/2026 12:12

Mumterz · 20/08/2026 11:41

I think it was a Qatari and a toilet cubicle. Disgusting though.

I remember that case. He claimed to be a simple camel herder who had no idea rape was wrong. Utter lies of course - just another chancing bastard with a soft, gullible Western justice system.

EasternStandard · 20/08/2026 12:13

LakieLady · 20/08/2026 12:12

I certainly think issues around consent should be covered in PSE or whatever it's called this week.

It is.

Somerford · 20/08/2026 12:15

StandingDeskDisco · 20/08/2026 11:59

I was talking about the willingness of the jury to convict once it comes to trial, not about the behaviour of the police or CPS.

You'll need some evidence then. I can only find a study around conviction rates by ethnicity, which shows virtually no difference in jury conviction rates between white and BAME. This is a different distinction to foreign/native, but it counters your "bet" on systemic bigotry as a means of explaining away the data.