To expect everyone at my wedding to stick to the colour scheme?

[Autumnalbride]

I'm having an autumn themed wedding. I've asked everyone, all the wedding party, family and all the guests to wear autumn colours - brown, orange, yellow, red etc.
Some of the men want to wear grey suits but I am upset by this because I don't see grey as an autumn colour. They say they will wear autumn coloured ties and accessories but I said I want the suits to be in Autumn colours
Is this unreasonable?

Oh dear. I'm hoping that this is fake...if not you're being extremely unreasonable. Just because you're getting married doesn't mean you get to dictate what people wear. Because you want perfect pics for socials, I'm assuming?

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YABVU. I don't know why people want to dictate what guests wear. Clothes are expensive and buying something for single occasions is wasteful. Most men don't have an autumn coloured suit and would never wear it again either. I'd either wear something I've already got or just not go at all.

Why don't people look for, and READ, updates from the OP before they post???? 🙄

can someone share the reddit post that someone mentioned and op confirmed exists?

? Sorry ?

People go to a wedding to celebrate the day with the couple and they don't have to attend much less wear what they are told! Imagine that a guest is completely skint and has 1 outfit/suit that he or she wears for formal occasions, how awkward & embarrassing for them to have to go & find a new outfit. And there are people who just don't feel comfortable in formal attire so they wear smart casual. I was far too busy enjoying the day & seeing everyone else having fun to notice what they were wearing.

Grey is autumn colour ?

This - and there is no way my DH would be buying or hiring a suit in those colours because he would feel and look like an utter clown. 99% of men would - and I say that having recently been to Mamma Mia party and the 58th street thing where you dress up, and both DH and I got involved in that… because it cost a few quid to repurpose old clothes for a few hours of fancy dress. Because that is what the bride was asking for: guests to buy and wear fancy dress.

What happened to the bride and groom just being happy to have their friends and family come to their wedding at all?

Wow.. how on earth has your sister managed to turn into such a nasty bitch? Did something happen cos u seem very normal on the other hand

Unless you are paying for the outfits YAB massively unreasonable.

Look at the original post.
There should be an option in the bottom right corner "Select All"

That will bring up all the OP's posts so you can read them before making a reply

Yes you’re being totally unreasonable.
if you’re super hung up on it, just have you the groom and 2 witnesses.
Ive had someone try this, I was heavily pregnant and didn’t have the cash OR the inclination to ‘follow orders’ so I stayed at home and had a lovely relax without the pretentious drama from bridezilla

Read the updates.

So you the men to wear orange or yellow suits. Absolutely ridiculous expectation. People spend money on an outfit and want to wear it again.

@WutheringBitesorange jumpsuits are a great idea. Can you imagine the Bride’s reaction if everybody wore them. The photos would be a wonderful memory!

I don't like brown suits, they look cheap.

Never understand the disparagement over ‘crying and shaking’ - yes, you can take the piss if its a poster responding this way to someone ringing a door bell (yep, there was a thread about that), but I’d be tearful and would feel shaky if the entire of my extended family had been blown apart and into major row territory by a disagreement I was having with my sister. I often react this way to rows with my daughter.

DSis sounds like a nasty piece of work but that rest of family has her measure now. And no, you can’t expect a 13yo boy to be enthusiastic about the idea of being ring bearer. It’s not even a thing really, something made up to involve younger children. The best man carries it in his jacket, job done.

You are doing the right thing. Sorry it’s come to this. I have a complete banshee of a sister also who didn’t come to my wedding (which was after my brother’s wedding, where she was a disaster and amongst other things made a huge scene and cried hysterically so my mum had to leave to comfort her and missed all the family photos. She does have borderline personality disorder but knowing that somehow doesn’t stop the nastiness hurting. I am wondering why I still invited her to mine but grateful she never replied).

Weddings bring out the worst in toxic individuals. I agree with other posters, on the day spend that £300 with your family.

Are your parents still around? Have you spoken to other family members about this. I’m terribly sorry, I know how much it hurts when you’ve given so much and it’s met with vitriol.

I saw a post on Instagram the other day saying “the relationship between two sisters is psychological. One is psycho, the other is logical”. Fits!

I believe you OP because it’s all just a bit too random to be made up. The NT visit won me over.
I did actually laugh that you booted her from the family group chat.
I am sorry to admit that I really hope your sis uses mumsnet.

I’ll go against the grain - a bit.

If a sibling said to me that their wedding was autumn, I’d have just worn something in one of the colours and got on with it. Since you were buying the 13yo a suit anyway, I’d have got it in burgundy or brown, depending on what suits him better, then sold it afterwards on eBay or vinted. I would have told him to just hold the rings and I would not have got involved or risked any drama or stress.

That said, wanting all guests in a colour scheme is pretty bridezilla. I don’t want to buy new clothes if I don’t need them.

This - and it would be a no thank you. We own no clothes in that colours.
A wedding is expensive enough for a guest without buying one time wear clothes to suit a bridezilla.

Requests like this are bordering on kink surely?

Part of the fun of weddings is that people are human and dress how they feel comfortable and the day steers itself.

This is beyond controlling.

Same. And I detest autumn colours anyway.
Op babu. They are guests, not props.

Is your wedding about the exchange of vows and entering a legal contract with the person you presumably love or is it a "Wot a picture. Nowts too good for our Chardonnay - a reet good bash"?