Boomer parents who don't help their children

[hoarderofthedough]

I will preface this by saying that my own Boomer parents DID help me and my sibling, and I will be forever grateful. They were wonderful.

BUT.....my DH's mother, on the other hand is the opposite, and it's giving me the rage. I wondered whether anyone else had experienced similar?

She is super rich, and by that I mean a multi millionaire. She lives in a 6 bed mansion, has around 8 properties that she rents out, providing an income of circa £10k a month, and she lavishes it ALL on herself and her boyfriend.

Her daughter (my SIL) lives in a tiny house in an awful (dangerous) part of town, and doesn't have a pot to piss in. Scrimping and saving, not able to put the heating on in winter, no treats ever - and all the while MIL is jet setting to exotic holidays, always in business class....with not one thought for her DD and grandkids welfare.

On the rare occasions we meet up for a meal, MIL will let DH and SIL pay. Or at best the bill will be split - but never are we treated with her paying. However, she is very happy to treat her boyfriend to lots of things.

She's almost 80 now, and still has no thoughts of gifting money to avoid inheritance tax.

Anyone else experience this? I find it truly baffling, because if I was in her position I would be filtering down money to my adult kids regularly.

Why? I’d be sympathetic to their situation and wouldn’t spend my time telling them that they could buy a house and raise a family if they would only give up the avocado on toast and lattes.

I would hazard a guess that your father has been a deeply unpleasant person all his life, some people are and it is nothing to do with the year they were born.

Just out of interest where is your brother living given that he is currently experiencing cold and snow of such severity that he has been hosptialised ? you say he gets benefit money and you talk about multi million pounds being the currency so this would seem to indicate the UK which has been in a heatwave since May of this year 😕

You’re living in fantasy land. Much as I’d like to see the triple lock go abolishing it would have to be a manifesto pledge and guess what? The party proposing it wouldn’t get elected. Ditto means tested pensions - which would have to exclude all existing pensioners in any case. Reformed IHT would also be a vote loser because boomers’ children aren’t going to support it.

I'm thinking of demanding that I be cremated in my house.

Shame about the neighbours.

I'm looking forward to mine.

Well, that's your Boomer relative...I can't think of anyone - Boomer or otherwise - who has 200k lying around as spare cash.

Yeah £241.30 or £184.90 is gold plated. Like I said, fantasy land.

Fair enough. The reforms to inheritance tax are more likely to affect younger people, however. Most boomers have had their inheritance, such as it was.

As has already been said upthread, the Mumsnet demographic does seem to be heavily skewed towards the upper middle classes and I suspect that this gives a false picture of what lfe is like for most Boomers.

You've pointed out that we're dying out. Fine. Once we're gone, you'll have to find someone else to girn* about.

*complain/cry

I helped my kids because I wanted to. But adult kids need to drop this sense of entitlement, Unless you've earned it, it isn't your money.

@BermudaRhombus I'm curious what generation do you belong to and what age are your kids. Are still at school, enjoying the holidays?

Thank you. I plan not to be.

I've seen a few - unfortunately - when I had to organise respite for a relative in order to allow myself to have a operation.

As my late husband* used to say, young people should remember that they'll be old enough themselves some day (if they're lucky).

*Silent generation

What’s fantasy is that you think that’s affordable. So many examples across this thread of just how out of touch Boomers are. But arguing further won’t get us anywhere. Time isn’t on your side.

Reminds me of a song... Anyone who wants to listen will have to go directly to Youtube.

You're a very rude and bitter person. You have brought politics into what isn't a political discussion, you've tried to belittle people via their age and life experiences and used threats of the nursing home, which is laughable, since you have no power other than being a keyboard warrior.

This is why no one takes socialist/Marxist/communist spoiled comments, seriously.

You have a lot of time on your hands. Have you considered job or career counselling?

I don’t know. My parents both lived until their late 90s so I could have another 25 years. 😌

waves in Generation Jones

Aye, Mum made it to 90.

Its alarming common amongst his boomer generation. We need only to look at the president of the USA for evidence of that.

Not this country and its none of your business exactly where.

Oh good grief. Now we're getting the blame for Trump.

Because of course we’re all just like Trump. 🙄

Duh that's a straw man. The point wasn't that boomers are Trump or to blame for trump. Its that type of nasty selfish old man is incredibly and publicly common in that age group.

I mean we have people on this thread saying they want to be cremated in their houses to ensure no future generations get to benefit from them. We have a massive housing crisis. Can you understand why young people are bitter? Clearly not every Boomer behaves this way, but shame on those who do.

😂

It really wouldn't work in a terraced house.

Nobody’s said that. Where on earth do you get this bollocks from?