Worried about GCSEs

[alevelbtec]

I can't sleep at night as worried about teen dd and her results. She failed all her mock exams except English. I want her to do A Levels and go on to University like most of my family but I don't think she will be able to. I am really panicking about her future. AIBU!? I think it's effecting me more, she pretends she's ok or maybe she isn't I don't know.

That's the piling rig from my last job. I really love heavy plant. Has an almost steampunk aesthetic at times. My graduate job involved writing bids for shopping centre cleaning/TFM contracts.

I remember having to write an enthusiastic piece about a wondrous new innovation that was essentially a traffic cone with a hoover and mop inside it to clean up spills and 'mitigate the risk of slips, trips, and falls'. It was like pulling teeth.

Why the pressure to go to uni, because the rest of the family did? My daughter spent 3 months at uni, hated it. She left and found a apprenticeship. She was successful and is now with a law firm, training to be a solicitor and all her degree is being paid for by her employers. She left uni at xmas and began the apprenticeship 6 wks later. Not everyone is academic, but everyone has the right to be happy , in a job they enjoy. I hope she does pass her gcse's but if not, all is not lost. She can go to college and resit them. Trust me, she won't be the only one worried for a wk on Thursday. Hope all goes well

My 20 year old son is in the 2nd year of a 3 year level 6 apprenticeship after completing A levels. He's earning (very) good money as well as having his BEng degree paid for. He works for a large company and is therefore pretty much guaranteed a job at the end of it. Apprenticeships have moved on a lot from the YTS days. When he was looking I was amazed at the variety, money and opportunities on offer.

The big aggregates companies I work with all have apprenticeship schemes - Tarmac, Cemex, etc. We had a 20 year old guy learning the ropes and he'd already been told he'd have his own plant to run if he stuck with it - which I believe as many of the plant managers are in their early 20s.

The production manager was telling me that they're often a bit shaky at the start but after a few years are bang on. There's a lot of older guys in this industry and they're generally less interested in doing long hours for the money when it gets busy. The young guys will happily work a night pour for £450.

I’m going to bite. Proud of her as a whole person with many different attributes. A person is more than a bunch of numbers written on a piece of paper.

And yes, if that 1 GCSE was hard won, then be proud of that that GCSE.

Rare?

WTF are you going on about? How on earth is owning a salon rare? There are hundreds of thousands of salons across the country.

You sound awful. I’m sorry to say.

If a child works their socks off and struggles then yes absolutely. You love and cherish your children for what they are not their exam results. As long as mine do their best then that is something to be proud of. As earlier poster wrote about a young person who won’t be collecting her exam results as she passed from a brain tumour, her mum and dad would give anything for her just to be here collecting her results and wouldn’t care what they were. Get a grip FFS, I feel sorry for your kids and thank god they are so successful as they will probably need the money for therapy.

I totally agree. And this is the whole thrust of this thread. It sounds like OP's DD is trying hard, revising and working to the best of her ability. But her mother will consider her a "failure" if she doesn't get good enough grades, and go on to A Levels and university.

Be proud of the child you have, not the child you wish you had.

For all your banging on about education, you’re remarkably uneducated to the fact that everyone is different. For some children with SEN, getting one GCSE is an incredible feat.

It you seriously thought your daughter was going to be a lawyer / Dr etc I think you'd be more on it than to discover she'd failed all but one mocks and not really know why.. you'd have known it was coming and provide some support at home or with tutors etc..

This sounds fab! May i ask what a levels or brecs he did and how he got into the apprenticeship? This is what I would like to encourage mine to do ...well done !

So you went o uni... and what amazing job are you doing today for yourself?? Let's hear it. Some kids are not cut out for uni. If she wants to be an amazing hairdresser let her. In age of AI I know kids with first clas law degrees not getting work. Get a grip. You sound delightful as a human being... and if she doesn't make a lot of money surely your whole family that went to uni with your amazing high flying jobs can fund and look after her. Can you bloody believe the ignorance... poor kid

How was DD doing academically prior to mocks? Has she always been a high achiever, but just had a bad day, or has she always just managed to keep up with the workload?

In the gentlest way, if it's the latter, then she is incredibly unlikely to have the capacity to become a doctor or lawyer, just because you think that's the right path for her. Engineering can be achieved via the BTEC and apprenticeship route, but she will need to pass maths and have the drive to do it; it's very competitive and the good apprenticeships are very over-subscribed.

Does DD even want to consider any of your preferred professions? What is it that you excel at, after attending university? Do you really want to steer DD in to something which she isn't particularly committed to for herself, and can you afford to push her without her having to go in to debt for your needs (ie, can you fully-fund her course)?

I was sad when DS dropped out of university (engineering course) during Covid, but he has continued in that career path with on the job training and now several years of experience, and he and DGF are looking to buy their first house - both are early/mid twenties (but we are not in SE).

Please, please, don't push DD in to something she really doesn't want to do and may be miserable with, just because you think it's the right thing.

My husband works in IT with AI and says that in 10 years many jobs will be gone. He is also of opinion that apprenticeships will be the way to go and all of our family members are educated to a degree level.
It's a huge waste of money to study anything these days just to end up with lots of debt. Better save this money for a flat deposit.

Most people don't pay for university up front though and it would take quite a long time to save for a flat deposit if you just saved the equivalent of student loan payments each year.

And I'm assuming the children from families that can afford to pay up front are probably already getting a deposit too.

I agree that apprenticeships are the way to go, but there aren't enough currently.

Leave her alone at the moment. If she's failed, then she'll have to decide whether to resit or not. Let her see her peers move away into universities. She may decide she'd like to go to uni after all. If that's the case,and if she has the ability, she'll make sure she passes.
If she really doesn't want to go, then you can't and shouldn't make her just to satisfy your ambitions for her. This is her life, let her get on with it.
As many have said, a degree is not a guarantee of a good and secure future.

Hi, he did A level maths, physics and computer science as well as BTech engineering. Got average marks but across the 4 enough points for what was required by the Uni to access the course. The apprenticeship was advertised on the government apprenticeship site. He loves it! Day release at Uni, money in his pocket as well as learning on the job. He had no interest in going to Uni full time as wasn't bothered on the Uni lifestyle. Probably more chance of job at the end as well as the company is training him up to what they want/need.
A lot of the non-degree apprenticeships potentially turn into degree ones as well if the workplace see potential in someone as it keeps their funding from the government.

I think it's the way forward. I work in a school that tends to push the uni route so tbh until my own son was looking into it, I wasn't aware of the opportunities available. Also, I never realised there's no age limit so anyone can apply for an apprenticeship. I was tempted myself 😀

These degree apprenticeships can be harder to get into than Russell Group universities such is the demand these days with employers having thousands of applications to chose from.

You say she failed her mocks but I wonder if in reality the results were not as high as you hoped for but not a failure?

My daughter got her results last year and its all very nerve wracking! But she has to do what is best for her and what she is capable of doing. A levels are so much harder than gcses so she needs to make sure she is capable of doing them first. Nothing wrong with other educational routes!

I went to uni, it was standard amongst my friends but I don’t believe it’s the only option for my DC.

My DS will most likely do a BTech and then get a job. He’s not hugely academic but is driven and will work hard at something he enjoys. Even if that takes time. I’d rather he was happy. We are also SE based. I know it’s expensive but careers are different these days.

If you're a teacher, why can't you get your apostrophes correct?

GCSE 's.

It's GCSEs.

Grade 5's.

It's grade 5s.

Surely this is simple grammar?

It's not. It's simple punctuation actually.

It's punctuation which is part of grammar, actually.

How can a teacher teach wrong SPAG?

It boggles my mind.

Actually, you are right. I always thought of punctuation as part of grammar until a government invented SPAG and made them separate and equal.

Teachers with poor SPAG tend to be those who went to school before SPAG was routinely taught.