Whats the point of consent and asking permission if you get lied to

[MrsOctaviaCharlotteSmythe]

Whats the point of consent and permission ? friends meal and they cover the cost, they said here is x amount get what you want, so permission is asked what the limit is eg £20 and i can get whatever food / takeaway with it, the yes permission is given that i can buy what i want within the budget.

turns out a day or two after wards a sarcastic comment was made because i had 2 jacket potatoes with different toppings, so i said why is that an issue and it turns out that they still thought id get one instead of two ,

so i said i asked permission of what the budget was and i did ask what i could get then all i got was oh id still thought you would get 1 so i said why then say i can get x why not just say and be honest.

i guess this is more me moaning but why do people do this, say yes to x then they actually want you do to x instead its like why ?

before anyone asks we usually do a weekly meal out, and no they are fairly wealthy

Don’t worry, you can still trust her to pay for your weekly lunch

another examples have been similar ask if its ok to eg stay out till 10 then we get to 10 and friend says i didnt want to stay out till this time etc

It’s all very odd to me. You go out for lunch every week with your friend, who you say is tight with money, but they’re also happy to pay each week, but then recently they moaned about how much you cost them, so this time you asked for a budget, and they gave you a budget for your food. It sounds like a very odd set up and odd relationship. If they moaned about you costing them too much recently, are you not too ashamed to now let them pay for you again? I’d be mortified.

Yes, you can but be considerate of other people. Don't take advantage of other people's kindness. That's your lesson tbh.

i know they are wealthy, they just seem to say one thing do another and moan about others

You are completely missing the point. People don't normally have to say "don't pick 2 meals" when getting treated. It's just not the done thing.

I am wealthier than my friend, doesn't mean I want the micky took out of me....

Because you never explicitly asked them "Can I have 2 meals"... so they xpuldnt possibly have answered honestly.

They cannot pre-empt that you would put in a double order (irrespective of the price or size of the spud).

Maybe it's you who should be more explicitly in your line of questioning seeing as its you who is a) abusing a friendship for weekly meals and b) not able to understand basic etiquette.

Move on. Pay your own meals. Case closed.

Moan about others taking advantage of them like you do? I’m not surprised.

i asked can i order what i want , and surley ordering two meals comes under ordering what i want ?

No. You order one meal or pay yourself. You don't want to get it do you?

Well generally only if you’re a CF!

Reasons like: they don't feel a need to, because they understand indirect communication and don't find it causes many misunderstandings in their lives. Or, they think it's rude to be very direct (lots of people think this), especially if they think that what they want might be different from what you want, and so they'll be indirect about their wishes to be polite (like saying they don't mind staying out until 10, but then saying they're tired at 9).

no wonder theres confusion etc in the world

Are you happy with your friend?
If you continue to behave like this you properly don't have a friend for long.

How about reading the thread trying to learn how people interact?
If you don't play by the common social rules (whether you like them or not) you risk becoming very lonely. It's a choice can you afford not to?

a cunty fucker with 2 potatoes

thats why im ranting on here, i value the friendship it just puzzles me
and yes i know your points are valid and thank you for them, its just im frustrated

That’s not what the C stands for!!

How do you know this friend? Is she your age or older? It sounds like more of a parent/child relationship than a relationship between two adults.

It sounds as though she feels responsible for you but gets annoyed if she thinks that you are taking advantage.

A lot of confusing for you maybe. Most people aren't confused by this situation at all.

on general mumsnet it means cunty fucker or at least ive always known it to mean that

The last time 2 jacket potatoes were so misunderstood, Brian Harvey got arrested.

No... surely not.
It's completely and utterly cheeky, greedy and downright rude. If you wanted two meals you either should have said something along the lines of "I'll get 2 potatoes as I think they're on the smaller side, is that OK?" or "I'll pay this week as I'm famished and going to get 2 orders... my treat this time"

You mention Sheldon Cooper quite a bit in this thread. Are you generally socially awkward do you think? I don't mean that in a rude way, but it might explain why you don't seem to be grasping the responses on this thread.

I don’t think OP wants to answer on the relationship but it certainly doesn’t sound like two equals

is she a flat mate? You seem to spend a lot of time together/communicate a lot