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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Things you could afford but choose not to spend on?

108 replies

Netcurtainnelly · Today 15:55

Things you could afford but don't bother with/choose not to spend on.

Inspired by the cleaning thread.
What could you afford but don't have/do?

A cleaner, just do it ourselves.
A long haul holiday. No interest.

OP posts:
LifeBeginsToday · Today 16:53

Holidays. I have no interest in them. I am on annual leave and kept being asked where I'm going. To the sofa - see you in two weeks.

Charlize43 · Today 16:55

A Brazilian bum lift.

I've never really understood why having a fat arse is something to aspire to,

Maybe it's because I'm French. I'm quite trim.

waitinginwonderland · Today 16:56

Brand new cars on finance. I could afford the monthly payment but why would I invest in something that loses value every day? I drive my cars into the ground then replace with another second hand one.

godmum56 · Today 16:59

Too many things to list.

GrandmasCat · Today 17:00

Takeaways, cocktails, takeaway coffees, branded clothing and bags.

Then, I spent it all on expensive adventure holidays as if I was not earning the peanuts that I earn.

havingoneofthosedays · Today 17:08

Deuce26 · Today 16:00

Being smug

🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼

KookyFish · Today 17:09

All the regular stuff, nails, new car, expensive clothes, beauty treatments etc

Completely agree with other posters that this happened when I became a lot more comfortable with money, I know so many people spending their last £100 on clothes whilst I could buy them 100x over and just don't feel the need to anymore.

Granted I walk around looking like a homeless person sometime but I have this internal peace of mind that I can afford it all if I wanted to.

Now holidays is where I spend my money!

DressOrSkirt · Today 17:14

A car
Taxis (I'm a big fan of public transport)
Lip filler/Botox
Hairdresser
iPhone or other apple products

RaraRachael · Today 17:14

Any form of body or facial "enhancement"

Pedant61 · Today 17:15

Sparrowsandbudgies · Today 16:20

A bigger house. A fancier kitchen. General home improvements unless really necessary.

We spend all our disposable income on eating out, days out and holidays.

All of this! On my deathbed, I want to remember all the fabulous places I have visited, not the fact that I had a conservatory or redecorated constantly!

WonderingAboutThus · Today 17:16

Offherrockingchair · Today 16:13

Loads of things and the more money I’ve had, bizarrely, the less I’ve coveted things. It’s as though knowing I could if I wanted to is enough. I’m sure a psychologist would have an explanation for that!

Me too, 100%. We used to have twice the money, with no kids and free housing. Now we have a huge mortgage and kids and half the income, and struggle to break even.

I need to remind myself I never wanted (or did) the expensive holidays or expensive clothes or expensive restaurants, because not being able to have them makes me dream of them!

squirrelchops2 · Today 17:19

A million pound house.

DancingNotDrowning · Today 17:20

A new car.

DH has two cars plus a motorbike.

i have zero interest. Mine is 7 years old. Does me perfectly well. Every few months he’s says why don’t we get you a new car but the idea of having to go and test drive options, wait for delivery and then get to grips with a new set of buttons is so off putting that I just can’t be bothered

menopausalmare · Today 17:24

A stupidly big status car- prefer my 14 year old fiesta.
Fake tan/lips/tits/nails/hair extensions/ lashes/veneers/ eyebrows.

teaandtoastwithmarmite · Today 17:30

@Paradoeshow do you do it yourself?

Girlintheframe · Today 17:30

expensive jewellery - I just don’t get it also see designer handbags/clothes

flash car - also don’t get it.

organic food

super high end skin care

I would however spend every penny I have on travel.

RobertaFirmino · Today 17:38

Likeiloveyou · Today 16:14

Bigger house
Better/newer car

Not interested in either. I prefer to spend my disposable income on holidays.

Same here. I live in a 2 up, 2 down and drive an 02 Focus. I want to see the world.

shelbysummers · Today 17:40

LadyMacbethWasFierce · Today 16:10

Spa days/beauty treatments/make up/hairdresser/nails. It’s not because I think I couldn’t be improved! I just don’t enjoy any of that.

I had never even been to a hair salon (had had a friend of a friend cut my hair at home) until a few months ago, when my beloved daughter died unexpectedly and I just needed to look entirely different. Not like myself at all. I was 58 and had long reddish brown hair that was not as grey as some of my vintage and that I coloured myself. I’d have happily hacked it all off and bleached it at home, but for the sake of my other children and my husband and my father I decided to have it done professionally so I didn’t look a total fright (I wasn’t sleeping or eating and looked dreadful already).

I was a professional woman with a good income. I could have afforded salon treatments for years. I just could not be bothered. I have to say my fabulous daughter would love the new me. But for me it’s just about not looking like myself now.

My heart aches for you. I can’t begin to imagine your pain. I really hope that in time the pain eases for you x

ImpossibleGermany · Today 17:40

Designer label clothes. I live a low key lifestyle so there is really no point. I have occasionally stretched to the odd designer bargain in the sales, but only if it was something versatile I knew I'd wear for years. Nothing too 'this season.'

Big five star hotels/resorts. I've stayed in loads and I've realised I prefer small boutique hotels with more charm and character, or lovely Air BnBs with our own space and privacy.

Multi Michelin starred restaurants with 7 course tasting menus. Again, I've been in quite a few and after a while they all start to seem a bit 'emperor's new clothes.' If you asked me six weeks later what I actually ate there, I couldn't tell you. I vaguely remember being impressed but I can't remember why.

Whereas I can remember some of the best meals I've ever had in much simpler, less expensive places where the menu doesn't read like a chemisty experiment, for years on end.

Sky. It just got ridiculously expensive for the amount of stuff we actually wanted to watch on there and we still ended up subscribing to various other streaming services anyway.

Cruises. I just don't think I'd like them. DH disagrees but I'm holding out.

A Rolex. I don't like them and never have. I lost my really good watch (an Ebel) but if I replaced it, which I won't, I'd get a Cartier.

I won't pay thousands of pounds for a handbag either. I've got a couple of really good fakes that were expensive as fakes go, I did a lot of research on how to tell a good fake from a bad one, and went to a specific shop in Bangkok especially to get them. I've also got a couple of 'real deal' vintage, second hand bags which would originally have cost far more than I would ever spend.

I'm probably not buying myself any more diamonds but I wouldn't spend a fortune on natural diamonds any more either. The lab grown ones are more ethical and every single bit as good, for a fraction of the price. My diamond stud earrings got stolen and they weren't covered by insurance so I didn't replace them for a few years. I recently replaced them with some gorgeous lab grown ones and I paid about 1/3 of the price natural diamonds would have cost for a similar size and clarity.

I like a nice car and I will spend on a high spec and a premium brand but I have zero interest in Range Rovers and Porsches and the like. I don't do flashy or blingy.

Botox and fillers. I used to have them for a while in my forties but I let them all wear off about ten years ago. If I start to look hideous I'll get a facelift.

I will spend a lot on good quality furniture that won't go out of style but I won't spend a fortune on trendy accessories that are the 'of the moment' because I know I'll be sick to death of them in three years time. Same with very expensive bespoke curtains and upholstery. Plain, classic fabrics only. Nothing that's a really trendy pattern or motif that will date heavily. I save those for cushions. Then I don't feel bad if I want to change them.

Designer brand cosmetics and skincare. Things like Chanel and Dior. I do spend a lot on decent skincare and make up but I buy from middle to high end dedicated skincare and cosmetics brands like Elemis, Estee Lauder, Mac, Charlotte Tilbury etc. Not haute couture fashion brands where you are paying through the nose for the branding and the packaging and they've probably outsourced their production to someone else anyway. I did once buy a Chanel foundation and it was terrible.

I let my hair go grey/white rather than continue spending a fortune every year trying to keep up with a monthly colouring regime. It's the best thing I ever did and I love it.

AFPotts · Today 17:42

I buy, or would buy if I could, almost all the things on here! Except holidays. It's amazing all the little treats you can have if you only go on short cheap holidays.

We all make our own cost-pleasure analysis on these things.

But I've also experienced the 'when you can afford it you want it less' phenomenon - anyone know if it has a name?

CurlewKate · Today 17:45

Private education.

blackrabbitwhiterabbit · Today 17:46

RaraRachael · Today 16:00

A bigger house- 2 bedrooms is enough and it's in a beautiful location
A flashier car- ours gets us from A to B just the same
Expensive clothes - no occasion to wear them
Expensive skincare/makeup - absolutely no interest

Same here.

Popstarrrrr · Today 17:48

According to a old friend of mine I should have a house commensurate with my role/salary bracket instead of my little-nearly-mortgage-free- terrace in a grimy but loveable to me part of east London.

No thanks. I have lots of long haul holidays to spend my money on.

TeapotOnTheAga · Today 17:49

A newer phone, currently living with a XR which is going on 7 years it works fine, recently changed the battery.

My 13 year old Volvo XC90. Nobody notices her, built like a tank and sounds like one (compared to modern cars she is serviced to within an inch of her bearings). Lovely old thing.

When we go out I don't buy ice creams, coffee, cake, packet sarnies. All so overpriced. I have a very nice coffee machine at home my splurge is coffee beans.

Rarely have takeaways, prefer to cook.

Cleaners, window cleaners, gardeners. Me and dh do the windows properly not just the glass like I see window cleaners around here doing it. I do my own cleaning, its a big house so I clean as I go then do a weekly spritz and a seasonal spritz. The garden, I do it unless something is very heavy then I ask dh to help, I do have two men to do my hedges and trees once a year, it involved ladders and I'd struggle.

I know a good painter/decorator but I enjoy doing it myself. The areas I can't reach (landing and staircases) yeah he can do those.

A wedding planner, I could afford to get someone but me and dd are doing it together.

Our main telly is 17 yo this year, until it fails won't get a new one.

JoleneJoleneJoleneJoleneJolene · Today 17:49

Charlize43 · Today 16:55

A Brazilian bum lift.

I've never really understood why having a fat arse is something to aspire to,

Maybe it's because I'm French. I'm quite trim.

Yes, us English aspire to fat bums at any cost if we can't grow them ourselves
C'est la vie 🤷‍♀️