WIBU to withdraw my offer of accommodation after she cancelled dogsitting?

[Dogshitter]

A good friend of mine recently got in touch asking if she could stay with me for a few weeks during August. She has been travelling and can’t move back in to her house until her current tenants have left. As it happens, I needed to find a Dogsitter for one of the weeks when I’m away working. This seemed like the perfect arrangement and I would have been happy to accommodate her as it suited us both. I cancelled my paid booking with my regular dog sitter and informed said friend.

She messaged me late last night saying she’d accidentally double booked and agreed to do a house/dogsit (trusted house sitters or something) during the week I needed her to dogsit. It’s in a location close to an elderly relative of hers so she can spend some quality time there too. She was hugely apologetic but resolute that she couldn’t cancel the other dogsit in favour of helping me.

This has been arranged for almost a month, and I’m now in the situation of having to find paid dogsitting over the bank holiday weekend. It’s not just about the money; my dog is really nervous and not the best fit for many dogsitting situations.

I feel like telling her that she can’t stay for the remaining weeks now that the situation no longer works for me. We agreed this prior to her taking the other booking, and it’s left me in the shit.

WIBU to refuse to let her stay now?

I wonder if the replacement dog sitter is offering to cover your dates only if you allow her to stay the next week too? So unfortunately you won’t be able to host your friend as you have decided you may as well extend your holiday.
Just a thought! ;)

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Maybe I'm an old cynic, but I simply don't buy this "accidentally double booking" crap that people trot out. When one is a grown adult, there's nothing "accidental" about it because if you know you have another big commitment you check the dates before agreeing to another one. She's spinning you a convenient yarn.

She's a user . I'm sure she'll find someone else to use . I wouldn't accommodate her .

If she has tenants she's not that desperate .

Genuine question, is this actually a thing?

People rent out their property and bum accommodation from friends and family when they’re at a loose end?

Presumably they supply the obligatory odd meal and bottle of plonk?

Yes I think that’s fair enough. I message back saying, I’m really sorry but I can’t have you stay over that week as I’ll now need to house a pet sitter instead. I cancelled the pet sitter so that you could stay. No hard feelings, it was just a mix up and will work itself out.

Absolutely a bit but only a teeny bit.
Stuff her.

For me it would depend on how good a friend she is. Does she have form for being flakey? If so then I'm not sure I would have asked her to dogsit in the first place.
I do hope you were able to find someone new to dogsit.
I suppose you could ask her to share the fees as you weren't expecting to have to pay them.

I'm glad to hear that.

She has really let you down, but I'm shocked at the amount of people on her accusing her of taking the mickey and suggesting just to cut her off. I hope none of you have ever made a mistake.

I would let her stay for the other three weeks but charge her what you have paid for the dog sitter.

Staying for a few weeks? I’d be in jail for murder! I can manage maybe 2, max 3 nights having guests. You’re a far nicer person than me.

It depends if she’s a friend or an employee of sorts. If she’s a friend a bit odd if you would only allow her to stay if she does something for you, that’s too much of a give and take for me for friendship

In my book, the first thing you commit to is what you do, barring extreme circumstances like a funeral or job interview. The friend should have cancelled the second booking.

OP why ask at all if you’re already decided it’s a mistake. Not her fault and you’ll take it on the chin!?

@Datafan55 thank you, I agree. I know everyone piling on is a way of them showing support for my OP but you’re correct; people sometimes make mistakes, and in long term friendships it’s bound to happen at some point. I’d be a very lonely person if my friends had cut me off every time I screwed up

Because I often need to thrash things out before I decide what to do and how I really feel. I have boundary issues and always second guess if my initial reactions are the correct ones. I think it’s part of being (or trying to be) a good person. I had a sleepless night worrying about this after a really stressful sleep deprived working weekend. My hormones are all over the place and I sometimes need mass opinions to land in a more rational place. I’m grateful to be able to do this anonymously rather than leaving a trail of destruction in my personal life. AIBU is a really useful tool to help me gauge!