AIBU to set a summer schedule for my kids this summer holidays?

[livingthroughchaossince2010]

I have 5 children, the oldest is 16, the youngest is 5. With the summer holidays coming up I realised that I don't have to have summer be as stressful as possible! We are going abroad for 2 weeks but we are home for the other 4 weeks. And every year I lose my mind during the summer holidays. All 5 kids being home for 6 weeks is a recipe for absolute disaster! So I am trying to set a schedule this year, hoping for the best. The schedule is:

Everyday: Everyone is awake by 9am, chores whilst breakfast is being made, clean up after breakfast, 30 minutes of school work to avoid the school slide over the summer, lunch, every evening one of the kids helps cook dinner, dinner, give the house a quick tidy, then for the younger kids it's bath then reading then bed at 9:30pm
Monday: Creative Monday - Build something, do some arts and crafts, be creative
Tuesday: Trip Tuesday - Go on a trip to the zoo, aquarium, a day trip, beach day
Wednesday: Water Wednesday - Go to the swimming pool, a splash park, see if there is any water parks, maybe turn the garden into a mini water park - if its raining then we change the plans of course
Thursday: Thinking Thursday - Library every week then we go to a museum, historical location or we go to an event that is encouraging learning
Friday: Friday fun day - Bowling, Mini golf, cinema, theatre and then we have a family movie night at home that evening
Saturday: Relax - We have no plans!
Sunday: Sunday Reset day - clean the house to have a nice clean house for the week ahead, my DH and I will plan for the week ahead and meal plan, family takeaway night

The teenagers obviously don't have to follow the day to day schedule. They have to be up by 9am, do chores and do their school work but they don't have to come with us to every location we go to during the week. This schedule is more for the younger kids benefit!

I told another mum my plans earlier this morning, she thought I was bloody mental for trying to schedule the summer holidays! Apparently the summer holidays are for relaxing and no plans but every year I go insane and this feels like an efficient way to solve the yearly summer holidays stress! My kids thrive when they have a routine.

Am I unreasonable for setting a summer schedule this summer?

I don't think teens will thank you for this

YANBU but be prepared for disappointment 😃

Why do your teens have to wake up at 9am?

They don't need to be up at 9:00 a.m.

This isn’t an option for us. We both work. Children in childcare.

As the mum of children who need a schedule, I think it’s a good idea. Ours doesn’t work quite like yours but we have a daily summer holiday calendar and most boxes are already filled.

Cause they would wake up at probably 3pm otherwise!

Not the point of the thread but as someone with only 2 and struggling massively how the heck you gonna afford all these trips for 5! I’m jealous 🤣

It doesn’t sound cheap! I live in London though so zoo / aquarium are once per holiday, not once per week, here

It’s a bit fixed for me, eg what if you want to go to the water park on a Tuesday or go on a trip on a Saturday?

You can have a structure without setting out the days in advance. I ask the kids for a load of things they want to do and put them on a list. Then we pick one per day when we want something to do. They each have a “summer project” as well. It was learning to ride a bike one year.

They have to be up by 9am, do chores and do their school work

You did say holiday?

9am wake-up? School work every day? I say this as gently as possible: ew.

Sounds a bit forced and inflexible. Also is the 16 year old happy to accompany you on some of these trips?

It’s interesting because I’m like you and also have 5 children with the youngest and oldest the exact same ages. I don’t make my older DC come on trips to the library or local museums if they don’t want to, just the younger two come most often.

The way I structure it is one “big day” out a week which is often to a city we’ve never or barely visited or the beach, one day is the library/local museums or maybe the cinema, one day is swimming and two days are my research days so I WFH & they play in the garden, do crafts, bake etc. We always go out at least one weekend day as a family with DH too. As I say, the teens aren’t forced to go out except on the big day out and family trip.

So?

Great idea

i did this with my teen last year and it made the whole holiday so enjoyable with things to look forward to and no “im
bored”.

Will be doing it again this year

Mine like a schedule, but I let them run it.

we sit down at the start of the holidays and write a list of things we would like to do and see. Anything from a play at the river to building a den. Play dates, local events get marked on, the rest floats and we pick an idea from the list depending on the weather and the general mood.

30 minutes of school work every day in holidays seems a lot.

Then we change the plans! This is just to stop me having a headache trying to figure out what to do every single day

You could talk with them. Wouldn't 10 am work? If I was teenager it would feel like holiday to be dressed and ready for chores and school work at 9.

I think it might work for the younger ones, but isn't fair to enforce a primary school type timetable on the older ones.

Why can't they all chill out a little bit? My dc do plenty of activities but they enjoy rest time too! I think there's a benefit in letting dc get a bit bored and make their own fun sometimes.

It feels like you're trying to group a 5yo and a 16yo together and their needs are just too different.

As I said, the teens aren't forced to come with us. This schedule is mainly for the younger 3 kids!

People are hung up on the wake up time but my DC wake at the same time every day pretty much even if it’s the weekend or holidays which is 6.30. Circadian rhythm is a thing.

I think a loose schedule of days out and relax days at home is nice. Apart from that, I think it’s too regimented and your teens won’t thank you for being so controlling.
9am seems very strict for teenagers. I understand not wanting them to sleep away the holiday but when children turn into teenagers we need to give them some autonomy.
why does it affect you if they want to sleep in until lunchtime now and then?
I think you need to loosen up massively.

I don't think you should make everyone get up at 9 and do schoolwork. Or stick to such a tight schedule. Sometimes kids just need to just be. Don't the older ones go out with their friends?

I think it sounds a bit OTT. Maybe just plan some day trips, playdates, holiday club like cricket or drama for a week, then leave the rest flexible.

Rather than "school work schedule" do something like reading a longer book, learning about something together etc. Set overall stuff for the teens and let them manage the timings. eg my DS is going into Y10. I have said we'll watch the films of his GCSE set texts and he can do BBC Bitesize so he knows the key themes before Sept. Don't make teens get up early, they do that all school year.

There are plenty of other options. It’s not a binary up at nine or asleep all day. Wake them later. Look at the research into teen body clocks and sleep requirements (highlights - they tend to need more sleep and cope better when it happens later: later to bed and later to wake)