Is it too late for a third baby?

[Yolo12345]

I’m fit and healthy and have two children - 9 and 7…but I really feel I would like one more child. The thing is I’m 47…. I still have periods…and have lots of energy…, so AIBU?

Honestly.yes it's too late.

Yes. YABU.

Yes and when that temporary feeling passes you will be glad you didn't

Yes it probably is. Last hormonal push for fertility is normal, put it aside and be grateful for what you’ve got

Yes, it’s too late.

By the time the kid is 20 you’d be pushing 70 and who knows what health you’ll be in. It’s not fair for a late teen / young adult to have to worry about their parents when they start their adult life.

I’m 33 with a 3 year old and a 10 month old and I can’t wait to stop having to sterilise bottles within the next few months, faffing about with weaning and generally the hard work that comes with having a baby, yes I adore them and they are the best things to ever happen to me but there’s no amount of money in the world that somebody could pay me to have a third. If you were 10 years younger, I’d say go for it but even if you fell pregnant say this time next year, do you really want to be doing night feeds approaching 50? It’s not what I’d want personally, not to mention the higher risk to you and the baby in pregnancy.

Yes, too late. You’d be pushing your luck with regards to possible birth complications and health risks for the baby.

Going against the grain…it’s not impossible. There’s some higher risks and it’s definitely pushing it a bit.

However it’s your choice only, you only know your personal situation. Yes it might surprise some people but honestly sod other people. Do what is best for you.

Thank you @Clickrodiofor your kind words x

you would need IVF (cue the thousands who know someone who naturally had triplets at 52 etc etc). And it's another throw of the healthy child dice, this time more weighted towards risk. Have you got the energy for that? I had a baby at 45 (our only child, long awaited, after much IVF and years of heartbreak and expense) and i think we are giving him a good life. I'm delighted to have him, he is a joy, but heck i would not have another now at 48, how we have hung on i don't know!

Not being nasty but definitely too late. The risks to yourself but especially the child are too much imo. Would you be prepared at that age to possibly end up with a child with disabilities? Think how that would also affect your other 2 kids too

What does your partner think?

Not being unkind but yes it's too late
Enjoy the children you have

Extremely selfish. There would be no benefits whatsoever to a potential child, even if it was born healthy. You were already getting on when you had your other children, you're likely burdening them with worrying about you in their thirties which isn't fair.

Even if you did live to see their children you wouldn't be much good as an active hands on grandparent. You would be late sixties with a student child. I'm 62 and can't imagine having a 14 year old child. My grandchild is a few years younger and I love her visiting and love looking after her, but I'd be exhausted doing it all the time.

I honestly hate the pile on these threads create on MNs. It’s still understandable for a woman to long for a child.

Op you know the risks & benefits and only you can decide how to live your life.

If some of it is that your kid aren’t little little any more I’d try to make peace with that. 9 and 7 are lovely age and you can have such a good life in the next few years without needing a baby.

Not everyone in their late 40s needs IVF.
About 10% of us carry genes for late fertility, and a reduced risk of age related miscarriages. These genes are also associated with longevity, so if you are able to conceive naturally at 47 you have a good chance of staying alive and healthy until the child is grown up.
I had no more difficulty conceiving at 46 than I did at 23.

Yes, why would you assume she’d need IVF @Whatatodo79? Have you got lots of data on her fertility? Silly, sweeping statement. I do think it’s a bit too old though, OP, sorry.

Honest opinion? Yes I think it’s a bit late for you. Enjoy your two children 😊

Biologically maybe not, but realistically it is very late.
You'll be nearly 70 when your child is 20, you might be full of energy now but most people will develop ailing health by 60 which means you are more than likely to be much less able with a 10 year old.

I'm about to have a baby at 38 and honestly I think that's pushing it.

I had a baby (my second) at 45. Felt fine & full of energy up until 47/48. Now 49 and I'm constantly knackered - peri I assume - I didn't foresee this level of tiredness coming at all so on that basis I'd say you might be able to do it, but it might not be a great idea. Good luck whatever you decide OP

Do it! And fast!

Honestly, i think you should review your life and start concentrating on your existing family and your career and your hobbies. Apart from anything else, the age gap between the children would make family life very difficult. I don’t understand why people don’t see having babies and toddlers as a stage in life, and then you move on. How would having a baby impact on the two children you have?

I agree with this.

I will add that you can't live your life based on the norm of others you need to work out what is right for you.

As someone who had a late in life baby (41), this is far too late. I feel like I really pushed it and I only have to give my time and energy to one child.

i am a bit worried about having a teen in my mid fifties. I will be ok as we have two parents, one child. I would not want to be trying to parent two teens and a primary aged child in the same mix as a post menopausal woman. You will be absolutely shattered at that point and you’ll still have ten years to go.

Hormones make us think crazy things but I would take a cold hard look at the reality of it. My child didn’t sleep through until 6. Do you really see yourself having the energy to get up at 2am every night in six years time for example?

I’d try wait this one out until the urges pass.

I would love another baby at 46, and in the media it seems like we are being bombarded with stories of women having babies in their mid to late 40s. But realistically those 45+ pregnancies have all come about with IVF and donor eggs. Is that really what you want? I mean you can certainly try to get pregnant naturally, but the chance is minuscule.