AIBU to not let in laws use my villa for free in peak season?

[dilwithvil]

I have a villa in Europe by the beach that I own independently of my husband. It’s effectively a high-end Airbnb in a very popular area and is usually fully booked from mid May until late September. It’s one of my income streams (I’m a SAHM but I manage several investments/assets, and this is part of my income). My husband also earns a very good salary, for full context, but all of “my spending” (coffee with a friend, make up, clothes, dentist) is paid by me from this income. I earn more than my husband.

My in-laws would like to use the villa for a week in peak season for free. My view is that peak season is when the villa earns money. If I block out a week for them, I’m not just “sharing a holiday home”, I’m giving up a week’s rental income.

I’ve said they’re very welcome to use it either in low season, when bookings are much quieter, or at very short notice if a peak-season booking unexpectedly cancels (which almost never happens).

They’re unhappy with this because they want to be able to plan a holiday well in advance, and they don’t want to go in low season because the weather is less reliable. Even if they paid half the market rate this is more than they would usually pay for a holiday, so they don’t want to pay that either.

For context, my parents do occasionally use the villa in peak season. The villa ultimately came from my side of the family (family money/early inheritance), so I don’t really see that as the same thing. Without them, there wouldn’t be a villa in the first place.

Also, while I get on reasonably well with my in-laws, I wouldn’t choose to holiday with them for a week or two, so inviting them while we’re there isn’t really something I want to do either.

AIBU for saying that if they want to use it in peak season, they should either pay the market rate (or even half), or go in low season? Or should family simply be allowed to use it for free regardless of the income I’d be giving up?

Loving your work Mia skewering the virtue signallers!

OP, just tell them you’ve sold it.

So you AND your husband have paid for some holidays for your in laws and you think therefore that all women should pay for their in laws holidays out of their own income? Do you not think the husband should pay with his own money if he wants to?

I can't believe you're so selfish and entitled. I would sell my hypothetical villa and give the proceeds to charity and then I'd do the same with my hypothetical other villa and give it to my in laws 😇😇

Yup that works as well. When we had our holiday rental (nothing fancy just a static caravan) my in-laws didn’t even know we had it.

That was dh’s choice but he didn’t want them asking questions and trying to get freebies and offering it out to their friends as well son has one he will do you a good price.

They still don’t know about it and we sold it 9 years ago.

That’s fine, but if that’s the case they have to accept that they won’t be able to afford more expensive holidays.

‘I don’t have the same amount of money as relative X’ does not mean ‘I’m entitled to a holiday paid for by relative X’.

Exactly. I was with you completely if it was about you needed the money and you would effectively be giving it away (like if my shop gave me a voucher, and family demanded to spend it themselves), but it shouldn't be one way for one set of grandparents/in laws and not the other! Yes, the money came from your side, but if you choose to marry, they're all your family and you should treat them the same way.. Just as it would be disgusting if they babysat their daughter's kids free, but not their sons (if he had any).

If you let your parents use it for free I think you should let your In laws use it too. It's mean to make them pay and it sounds as though you can easily afford it

I would donate my in laws to charity. 😇

OPs family gave her the villa in the first place so not the same thing.

Wise. IL’s know nothing of my inheritance to come, and never will. They’d have it allocated up between their various feckless relatives who spend money like abandon and quit jobs on a twice yearly basis.

No thanks.

Why’s it virtue signalling?

It’s just a different opinion.

I’d like to think I’m generous but no more than the next person.

OP has been given a villa.
Her husband already pays the bills- pretty clear in OP they are not in need of the money.
By the sounds of it, in-laws aren’t flush.
Her own parents use it for free (for obvious reasons of course, but still)

I think OP has been fortunate and I’d certainly like to think in her situation, I’d want to pass on my good fortune.

It’s only a week, we’re not talking about giving it to them or all of the other ‘very funny’ made up scenarios.

I will be gutted when this thread gets to the end.

OPs family gave her the villa in the first place.

Why should OP pass on her good fortune though and not their own son?

Their son doesn't own the villa.

OP is very possessive of it.

Son could pay for a holiday for his parents if he wished to.

Best user name 🤩

No one needs to justify being ‘tight’ with their own money and property. You don’t need to approve.

I’m absolutely ‘tight’ when it comes to people who, by virtue of knowing or being related to me, believe themselves entitled to anything I have.

Tbh I very much encourage their belief in my tightness, because it does mean they don’t bother me by trying to get me to pay for them.

Fair enough if that’s how you see it.

If it were me, I would absolutely be trying to justify it because I can’t stand tightness.

Son could pay his wife to let his parents stay at their high end holiday let that her parents stay for free?? <yes yes we know they contributed financially it is now the op's nonetheless>

How many people would genuinely give away a few grand on request.

Not because you want to, not because you’re feeling kind.

But because someone has asked / demanded it off you? Not for essentials not an emergency just a hey family member can I have £2k for fun money. And you’d say yes.

Because that’s what expecting a free stay in the villa is. It’s a request for money really because it’s lost income, while still having to pay for the electric used, the cleaner who will come, property taxes, wear and tear and so on.

It’s not free to the op it still costs money. So can I please have £2k and can you also pay my energy bills for the week and hire me a cleaner for a week.

Exactly.

Most people would be happy with what OP offered instead of making it an issue that they can’t use someone else’s property when they want to for free at that.

It is not their son’s villa but his wife’s. She doesn’t have to do anything she doesn’t want to and I bet if she did them this favour they would ask again.

From what she has said, they don’t sound that involved with her in the first place, yet want to be upset they can’t use her villa when they want to.

Great. May I borrow it please? Just two weeks peak season.

The son could pay for a holiday in a different villa.