Drunk messages from friend about staying at her house last weekend

[Footballjess]

I have woken up to my friend sending me a series of really shitty messages late last night/into early hours - obviously been drinking.

Last weekend, I stayed over at hers and her husband’s with my DH (they live about an hour away and we were watching the football which started late).

DH and I started to have sex when I realised my totm had started early so we stopped. There was a little bit of mess on the bed which I did my best to clean but had to tell my friend the next day and I offered to buy new sheets.

She was fine at the time and said not to worry. Her messages have called me all sorts, said I was disgusting to have sex when in her spare bedroom and that I should have known it wasn’t the right time.

I am really taken aback by the messages and haven’t replied yet. I’m thinking of just leaving it until she sobers up and hopefully apologises?

That's why there are mattress protectors.

Did sorting DH out create more mess on the sheets?

After the blood on the sheets, might have been best to call it a night.

You see this is far too much detail for me and I expect was the same for your friend .

No it didn’t create any mess in the bed. We did go to sleep after i’d cleaned up.

People shouldn't have sex on their honeymoon or book weekends away to spend time which might involve sex. That's batshit.

I wouldn't care if it happened in my house. I wouldn't ask either so would just change the sheets.

@Footballjess and cleaned what I could.

What the heck does that mean?

By the time you'd realised there was a problem the fluid would have stained the sheet and probably gone through to the mattress.

Have you any idea how difficult it is to get blood out of anything? It needs to be soaked in cold water immediately and then washed with a biological laundry liquid. Once it's set in the fabric stains are nearly impossible to remove.

No wonder your friend was as mad as anything. I would have not only asked you for new sheets but a new mattress as well.

She was out-of order to drunk text you but you created the situation in the first place.

Of course she declined your offer to strip the because because she was being a good host, but you actually accepting that and leaving it for her to sort was bloody disgusting.

So all your guests sleep on stained sheets ?
That's nice 🙄

Seriously? Gosh, I've been shagging my fella in hotels for five years.

"Sorted dh out"?!?! 🙈🤣

Fucking hell....

Ok. Not sure why she is being like this then. Period blood is nothing to be ashamed of, so your friend is BU.

I’ve had a couple of guests leave period stains, the sheets just get washed and forgotten about,

Um wtaf with all the judgment on having sex in someone else's house. Bizarre.

I hope you leave the chambermaid a good tip ?

If you mess up a bed someone else’s house - irrelevant how it happens - then you strip the bed and check to make sure it hasn’t gone further than the sheets or mattress protector. If it has, you’re in trouble because you need to address the problem immediately. If it hasn’t, you put the dirty items in the washer, and depending in the extent of the damage, replace the sheet if necessary.

Having sex is one thing, leaving your mess and stains for your friend to deal with is something else entirely..

So if that was the case what was your host's problem ?

I don't get it 🤔

Well I normally put things in the washing machine between people staying over and make sure the sheets are stain free. But I get you might leave the sheets on to reuse. 🙄

Hopefully she will elaborate when she sobers up. I have a slight suspicion she is jealous because I know she had been unhappy a while ago about her and her husbands lack of sex life at that time.

The thing that stands out most in all this is that the OP “offered” to strip the bed and the friend said not to.

I cannot conceive of any situation (short of total incapacitation) where I’d bleed on someone’s bedding and leave them to deal with it. I’d also have bought replacement sheets. But the leaving the soiled sheets for the friend to sort is beyond the pale.

It was not nice to receive drunken, unpleasant, messages of course. But it really was astonishingly bad to leave bloodied sheets on the bed.

Another one who doesn’t understand why you mentioned that you were having sex. You said you are open with each other, so I get that, but that scenario still doesn’t require you to admit you were having sex.

All you had to say, breezily, was that your period started unexpectedly and there’s blood on the sheets and that you’ve already stripped them and put them in the wash. You could have also said you’d ordered new ones online in case the stains don’t come out, but even showing willing to strip the beds and wash the sheets is polite enough

I think I’d personally be a bit weirded out by my friends having sex in my house as well, although I can’t explain why. You had any other night.

Oh come on, you're taking the piss now.

I genuinely don’t know what else would have sparked such an outburst a week later?

You've over-egged the pudding now.

Gosh. If this happened in my house - after hearing about the sex and the blood, etc. I might have said "it's fine, I'll sort it out" just to stop the conversation. If I did have to deal with a guest's blood, despite it being natural and accidental, I don't think I'd be inviting them again.

I'm on the Mumsnet prude side though, while i do occasionally have conversations about sex with friends, I wouldn't be discussing how I tried to have sex last night in their spare room and it didn't work out.
(I would probably have taken the sheets home and offered to buy new ones!)

She told her and offered to buy new sheets!

My heart breaks for all the mumsnet users who spend their lives disgusted at bodies, bodily functions, sex, shoes, tradespeoples' boots/farts/shits, feet, poo particles, snot, toothbrushes in bathrooms, flushing habits, bin habits, husbands' sneezes, periods, sweat, hairs, table manners, manner manners, colleagues lunches, nappy changing in public... seriously it is really sad :(

Lads, we're just very clever animals. We eat, shit, shag, socialise. That's it. Life is weird enough with sweating all the above.