AIBU to buy my daughter's boyfriend a replacement phone?

[AboutAPhone]

Sooo…name change and a few altered details for privacy. If I get found I don’t want people to see all of my other posts.

Simple one though really. My DD’s boyfriend has a really old phone and it just doesn’t work anymore. Constantly needs to be hooked up to a powerbank, and just useless. I suspect that his parents don’t use have the money around to buy a new one, but I do and I don’t mind.

I just wonder if I would be overstepping to get him one. I don’t want to offend his parents, I get on well with them, but I just don’t know how to help out without causing an issue. They’re both 17, no jobs yet as they have a very long commute to college and very little spare time to work until they finish next year and go to uni or start working full time, so can’t buy it themselves. Also no birthday or anniversary so I can’t slide the money to my DD to buy it for him as a present.

AIBU to buy one. Just the lowest functioning iPhone would be an upgrade so wouldn’t be spending megabucks.

Upgrade one of your phones and offer him the older one.

^ This - lovely thing to do OP.

I honestly think it’s more weird to do it in a sneaky way, pretending it’s an old one etc. I would offer it in the context of safety, if he and your DD are out together and get separated or whatever she needs to be able to contact him. But yes, I would check with the parents first.

They’ve been together/dating/best friends in some capacity since before they were teenagers, at this point he is part of the family.

I mean I write this as we are all on holiday together so we are pretty close.

He has an iPhone already, so it would make sense to just upgrade it to the cheapest one on the market. It would be an upgrade of about 3 models I think

I would buy a reconditioned phone, fifty pounds tops and offer it to him. Although what he didn't want it. I think anymore than that is over generous and potentially awkward, an iPhone is too much.

Same brain.

Do this, is his old phone an iPhone doesn't he have a contract that can be upgraded ? Seems a bit extravagant to throw around new phones just because,

I think it's very nice of you and as you have already considered: Upgrade DDs phone and give him her older one.

Why don't you ask him about the phone, Instead of assuming things?

Lovely idea

Have you or your daughter not got an old phone you can give to him or are either of your contacts ending so you have

Because you don’t switch to a different type of phone as a teenager. You have apps and games that transfer across, you get used to the tech. There is huge brand loyalty with phone types.

I would never move off iPhone, my husband would never move off android. It’s just the way it works. upgrading to the next model is what happens with phones, this would be no different.

But when they spilt up it will be all 'and you bought that twat a new phone mum! We need to get the money back! He used it to chat to other women..'

I don't think it's wise to buy a teen boy a new phone just because your daughter is sleeping with them.

I’d upgrade my own and then ‘hand-me-down’ the one I had. Then it doesn’t feel like it’s charity, just a ‘oh by the way I was gonna shove this in the drawer’

That’s a good way to go about I think

Unfortunately not. I buy them up front and have my plan as a sim only contract.

I could upgrade my DD but that would cost me a significant amount of money more than buying the lowest model available for her boyfriend. So that’s why I was thinking this way

I’d get a second hand one on envirofone and then maybe say you found your old phone does he want it

My DD isn’t sleeping with him, not that this is relevant. Have you actually read my replies. Boyfriend is like family as they’ve been inseparable since before they were teenagers, if they weren’t dating he would still be in her life right now. Maybe not when they’re older, but this isn’t just someone who is flavour of the month otherwise I wouldn’t have considered it.

This is NOT a good idea. Your DDs relationships should not involve you at all. What happens is they beak up, DD can feel aggrieved he has the phone. Do you buy all subsequent bf one? It is a terrible idea, and could damage their relationship and yours with her.

Yes, just say you got an upgrade or something and it is going spare.

I think the best way to go about it is ask his parents first and pretend it’s a second hand one that no one else you know needs and whether he would like it? That way they don’t feel indebted to you

Sounds kind. If you're worried about overstepping, you could ask your daughter if she wants to "give" him the present? Or "find" a spare phone somewhere, you maybe got yours replaced?

He is not your child. Or responsibility. Does n9t need another iphone but chooses to keep current with a powerbank that is fine. can get cheap brick or cheap android phone
He can try for part time work as 17.

What next? Socks underwear and designer clothes? Where will it end.?

But if you really want to then upgrade dd and she can pass on her old phone
Or wait til birthday /xmas and ask him if he wants a refurbed or old phone ? Maybe he 8s sav8ng up til can get new.
You can make sure your dd has phone powerbank etc and knows what to do if no signal (in emergency can always find a way to contact you)

I’d buy one that’s 2-3 years old and tell him it’s your old one. Or buy yourself or DD new one and give him the old one.

I think it's fine for your daughter to give it to him in the guise of it being an old one you no longer need.