AIBU to think the teachers were unprofessional about my son's lunch?

[SonnyHoney]

My 16-year-old son went on a biology trip today. He's currently doing A levels. He took a portion of fried mince (seasoned) and rice that he made yesterday with him. It was a fairly large portion. He is underweight and has been bulking by eating lots of protein and carbohydrates.

He said that both of his biology teachers put him on the spot for a good few minutes about his lunch choice. They were laying into him about how he needs more fibre in his diet and they didn't pick on anyone elses food. He is actually quite a shy lad, and he finds it hard to stick up for himself against adults.

I told him he needs to stick up for himself, and he said it was very hard to stick up to his biology teachers. Which I do understand as mentioned he is a 16 year old lad, and they are two women in their late 30s. He says that one of these teachers in particular is always picking on him. Other people in the class have noticed it as well, supposedly.

Am I being unreasonable to think its highly unprofessional for 2 teachers in their 30s to put a shy lad on the spot in front of all his peers and make him feel uncomfortable about his food choices for several minutes.

I've been a scout leader, and I'm now a guide leader and I'd never treat a teen like this.

Oh for fuck’s sake.

They’re out of order, of course.

Probably didn’t comment on ham sandwiches, like you say OP.

Missing the point but... my understanding is that leftover rice is a food poisoning risk and that you are supposed to eat it the same day you cook it?

I wondered this too.

It sounds like what ever the teachers intended, they didn't know their audience, seeing as he's gone away feeling like he's being picked on and defensive.

That said, a long, long time ago, when I was doing A-level biology, I quickly realised that given the opportunity, enthusiastic biology teachers would use people's packed lunches to remind us of the GCSE and A-level curriculum content related to nutrition. Any discussion of meals risked being a launchpoint into the necessity of fibre, what protein was used for or the symptoms of scurvy. This was particularly noticeable during downtime on biology day trips. Happy days.

The teachers sound in no way qualified to comment.

Having seen so much ‘science’ about nutrition change over the years, I’m very wary of the latest fad in nutrition. The current latest being the push for vegan and plant based as it’s cheaper with better profit margins. In reality a lot of the plant based alternatives on the shelves are ultra processed garbage. Red meat In moderation is nutrient dense with nutrition which has high bioavailability.

Different foods are needed by different people depending on their individual biology and activity levels. Some people have a glucose spike with white rice but others don’t - we all metabolise things differently.

Too much fibre can be as problematic as too little. Marathon runners will often eat a lot of white rice. Energy gels are pure carbs with no fibre but are the perfect fuel when doing high intensity exercise for long periods of time. Without knowing the full picture about your son, the teachers really shouldn’t be commenting and come across as irresponsible and ill informed.

In a practical sense, however, your son is going to come across people in life who have opinions he disagrees with and which he doesn’t want shared with him. In the future it might be work colleagues and it can often be important to get on with these people so teaching him how to deal with them is good practice.

It’s good to properly listen to what others say, consider it, but then know that it’s ok to discard it and not take it on board.

Maybe say. ‘That’s interesting, I wasn’t aware of that. Thank you’. But also know it’s ok to completely ignore what they said and dump it in a mental rubbish bin and empty it permanently.

He’s 16 not 6. If he really felt uncomfortable, then he could have just told them.

Who died and made them the diet police? I would definitely complain, it is not for teachers to comment upon personal choices if they are not related to education- tell them to mind their own business.

My friend talked to a dietitian about healthy eating, and was told to eat healthy 80% of the time, and allow herself to indulge the other 20%. Your DS ate mince and rice. Whoopee ding! At least he wasn't eating PopTarts and a chocolate bar.

I'm a teacher and usually defend teachers here but they do sound UR. I would never comment on a student's lunch unless they invited it and even then I wouldn't rip it apart, especially not a quiet member of the group. Why on earth do that - how rude. They have no idea what else he eats or why he had that - what if he was in a situation where there was no money for lunch and he had to take leftovers, or had some issues around food? And saying red meat gives you bowel cancer as if everyone who eats any amount will get bowel cancer - that's just ridiculous.

I probably shouldn't say this as it's just a generalisation, but based on my experience at work and that of my dc, there are quite a few very tactless science teachers knocking around so maybe they didn't mean to be so rude, as they say.

oh give it a rest, OP has said he is shy.

Weird to comment on anyone’s food ever. Assume that because they’re opting to eat it, they probably like it or maybe require it for dietary reasons and shut the hell up. Another person’s stomach contents is none of your business.

If hes 16 doing A levels
Im assuming hes 17 very soon
He doesnt legally have to be in a school his lunch hss nothing to do with them.

That was just one meal. It would be a problem if that was all he ate.

I would be more concerned about eating cold cooked rice that had been out of the fridge for several hours. I have had bacillus cereus poisoning before and it wasn't pretty.

Why am I more concerned about him carrying around cooked rice for a few hours and the risk of food poisoning? I
suggest your son increases his knowledge of not only food safety but also nutrition so he can de-bunk his teachers - maybe he can tell them about resistant starches and their impact on blood glucose? Perhaps he could tell them about his nutrient dense mince as part of a balanced diet for the day?

How do you think your local Chinese or Indian restaurants deal with rice. They certainly don’t cook it to order. Have you seen pre packed salads in the supermarket with rice included?

@pinotnow Well you know what they say about teachers! Maybe no other line of work was available?

Op - yes mention it. Nothing he ate would kill him. Personally I would not like what he had as cold food, but he did, so that’s fine. I’m amazed the teachers even looked at his lunch!

These are biology teachers. They’re likely interested in nutrition. They probably thought ‘Ah here’s a lad who’s clearly interested in nutrition because he’s not brought a typical teenage lunch of a greggs sausage roll, red bull and a whispa’. I think, therefore, they probably didn’t realise he was feeling sensitive about this.

I would tell your son it’s a case of crossed wires. Even if these teachers were gunning for him, in a few months he won’t ever have to speak with them again.

His lunch sounds really tasty. My husband would say that’s a complete meal right there.

This!

The superior bloody food police on this thread are just as annoying as the teachers . Are people so dense that they cannot imagine someone who cooks mince and rice is almost certainly having a healthier diet than the average 16 yr old . Nothing wrong with it at all alongside a balanced diet.

Choosing vegetarian/vegan alternatives may not be healthier as plant based alternatives are heavily processed. Many of them are Ultra Processed Foods.. so just the fact he is cooking from scratch is brilliant in my book is too be encouraged. People need to keep their self righteous opinions out of other people’s food choices. The ONLY time a teacher has the right to be involved with the content of a pupils lunch is where there is consistent poor nutritional quality alongside child obesity or potential malnutrition. Whereby they have a duty to refer to appropriate authorities when the child is too young to advocate for themselves or lacks sufficient knowledge to advocate for themselves.

I hope they've also taught him that 'of' doesn't mean 'have'.

FWIW I agree with them, but if they did indeed single him out for lunch comments that is unprofessional and I would have been uncomfortable with it as a grown adult..I do have a history of eating disorders which may inform this feeling.

I don’t mean this in an unkind way. But it must be exhausting being a teacher these days. They can’t say anything slightly negative without parents “kicking off”

Obviously we only know one side of the story, but if what those teachers say is true do you really think what they said was only 'slightly negative'?
Bowel cancer etc. For a few minutes.
Actually, I really don't believe 2 teachers were laying into a 6th former for a few minutes. That's not just a passing comment.

I'd be much more concerned about food poisoning - waiting to happen!

I mean they shouldn’t have laid into him, but equally meat and rice isn’t a balanced meal. He does need fibre and vegetables and fats. Not just carbs and protein.

Too much meat and not enough vegetables is fuelling an increase in colon cancer in men.

It was ONE meal. I'm sure the lad gets his fruit and veg from all the other meals!