Should I ask my neighbours if we can have designated times to sit in the garden?

[Guarddogdaschunds]

I will preface by saying that it is possible this heatwave has affected my rational thinking. So I will bite- I am so sick of listening to my neighbours having their dinner in the garden and having to listen to their booming voices for hours on end. It has reached the stage where we feel relegated indoors, especially in the evenings.

We live in a new build in close proximity to our neighbours so can hear everything as you can imagine. They are a couple in their early 30's (I think), no kids. The man with the booming voice works from home and has taken to working from his garden throughout the day, often vaping. My kids are off school, trying to make the best of the time off and I really don't think they should have to hear the details of his teams meetings. Surely he should work inside and allow people peaceful enjoyment of their gardens? I have never worked from home, but wouldn't it be considered a GDPR breach if others can hear?

They have had friends over for BBQs the previous 2 nights and have been sitting outside chatting until around 9pm. The BBQ smell lingered for so long and of course they were all vaping and drinking alcohol. One of their friends was regaling them with tales of her dating escapades-hardly an appropriate topic for my 9 year old to have in earshot. I also don't want my kids damaging their lungs inhaling all of those disgusting vape particles. The women have also been prancing around in very skimpy bikinis. I know women are entitled to wear what they want, but come on-all the neighbours can see if they look outside their upstairs windows! I'm also concerned as yesterday, the visiting friends were there for several hours and appeared to drive themselves home- were they over the limit?

On both occasions, I have brought my kids inside, as I don't want them to hear the sordid details of their conversations. I also feel awkward that they are only a few metres away from me, so I don't want to have my dinner outside in case they listen to our conversation. Would I be unreasonable to pop over or post a note through their door requesting that we have an outdoor mealtime rota so we can all enjoy our gardens in peace-as we are entitled to?

I honestly can believe this……you think they shouldn’t wear bikinis in their own gardens?!!
Theyve had bbqs until 9pm not 9am, you sound unhinged!
just enjoy your garden, stick some music on and you won’t hear them. If you dislike neighbours this much why did you buy a house with neighbours so close?!

Gathering evidence
Alright there miss Marple
You are the one escalating this with your nonsense

You’d hate to live on my lane. Kids are often out playing loudly, banging balls and bouncing on trampolines (I don’t have kids). DH and the husband next door both work from home and use the garden for it when it’s hot. Three of us have got hot tubs to and from which we prance in swimwear and everyone has BBQs and sits out chatting and playing music! It’s just part of having neighbours close by. We all rub along. Your neighbours aren’t doing anything wrong.

Take heart; it won’t be hot forever.

Do contact his employer, they will laugh at you like we are, and sympathise with him for living next to you. Hopefully thy then use this to go to the police and give them evidence of your harassment,

gathering evidence of what them having their mates round, vaping, having some drinks, a bbq, wearing bikinis in the garden, what part of you thinks this is something an employer would feel an employee should not do in their personal time,

you need to get a life. Get out, stop staying home. Becaude this is utterly tragic,

She’s jealous. So so jealous.

Im beginning to think that this is a wind up post.

The only reasonable request you could make would be to ask not to vape by your windows Maybe lowered voices if dodgy topix of chat but seriously, how many of those occur / interest your children.

The ICO will have zero interest in Joe Bloggs having Teams chats in his back garden where Barbara from next door can overhear.

Of course not, they will just cringe and feel sorry for him. Maybe pass it round the office for everyone to laugh at. He of course can go to the police and tell them his neighbour is stalking and harassing him.

I can’t imagine being so jealous of someone’s social life, their friends, the fun they have, the fact the women are comfortable in bikinis you’d behave as the op

it really is utterly tragic, she should be thinking to herself I’m behaving in an highly abnormal manner, what is causing me to do this, and when ghe answer is im jealous and it makes me feel shit as I’ve no mates, no fun, and don’t feel confident in a bikini then the answer is to start to fix those things, not double down and get even weirder.

Oh op you need to literally and figuratively chill.

I personally think it outrageous that people think they can dictate what people wear on their own property or when they can eat their meals.

😂 I would laugh in your husbands face if he tried imposing ground rules on me. All of this is happening within normal sociable hours. You can politely ask the neighbours but no more.

He can propose what he likes but they absolutely have the right to say no

What do you mean, at this point?? At what point would that ever become a sane thing to do? You’ve gone from being ridiculous but everyone can sense your frustration, to being absolutely fucking mental and, to be honest, a little bit dangerous. In what world is it normal to contact employers in a neighbourhood dispute? You should think very carefully about what you do next and hope he doesn’t do the same thing to you, telling your employers that you’ve stalked him, and have tried to cause him to lose his job because you don’t like his vaping, rather than simply knocking on his door like a bloody adult.

I wouldn’t want to listen to your children any more than I’d want to listen to them socialising. But as I can’t afford to buy or rent a home with no neighbours nearby, I accept that it’s just part of life. Perhaps your DH should spend less time stalking his neighbours on LinkedIn and more time looking for a better job so you can move to an isolated area where nobody has to suffer you. Absolutely insane.

At this point ? ARE YOU STARK RAVING MAD ?

they’ve done nothing wrong, I’ve sat outside this afternoon for an hour in my knickers and a tiny vest, the neighbours at the back of us have a radio on all day that I hate but it’s there garden not mine. I can hear cheering and clapping from the local cricket club, perhaps I need to have a word with them.

So why do you need his employer if you’re not contacting them?

It’s only a data breach if you can identify the individuals hes talking about and the ICO are so vanishingly unlikely to get involved in this it’s not true. Given that John Edwards has just been got rid of for making jokes about getting blow jobs from Smurfs, I think y have other things on their plates

Get your kids some water pistols and encourage them to fire them exuberantly

A big bag of footballs for them to kick around

Or a nice big trampoline they can bounce on noisily at 7am

I am all for being a considerate neighbour but vaping and endless noise is grim and I think that it means all bets are off and are entitled to be just as inconsiderate in return

I’d rather listen to their gossip than listening to screeching tenting brats actually. If you buy a new build however all things are part and parcel of living in crappy new build estates

Given your neighbours are such nobs that you can't enjoy a peaceful vape free garden you might as well go out and get the biggest trampoline you can fit in the garden and encourage your children to spend as much time as they like on it.

I don't know why you are still trying to be considerate to neighbours like that.

When I had selfish neighbours I started letting the kids play in the garden first thing in the morning. The neighbours got the hint eventually and toned down their evening bawdiness

So you are stalking them on socials for enjoying their children lives? I think we all see who the problem neighbours are in this scenario. You sound absolutely unbearable.

At least if you contact his employer they’ll tell him. I think someone should warn him that his neighbours are absolutely MENTAL!

What do you think the council are actually going to do? Sound recording equipment? If your council is anything like my old one they won't do anything unless all night parties are the norm.

Your first sentence nails it OP your bloody brain has been frazzled by the heat FFS have a word with yourself and calm down!!

I’m refusing to believe that people like you exist OP, because seriously, and I dont say this lightly, WTAF

I assume you posted this to give those that don’t watch football, something to do?