Should I ask my neighbours if we can have designated times to sit in the garden?

[Guarddogdaschunds]

I will preface by saying that it is possible this heatwave has affected my rational thinking. So I will bite- I am so sick of listening to my neighbours having their dinner in the garden and having to listen to their booming voices for hours on end. It has reached the stage where we feel relegated indoors, especially in the evenings.

We live in a new build in close proximity to our neighbours so can hear everything as you can imagine. They are a couple in their early 30's (I think), no kids. The man with the booming voice works from home and has taken to working from his garden throughout the day, often vaping. My kids are off school, trying to make the best of the time off and I really don't think they should have to hear the details of his teams meetings. Surely he should work inside and allow people peaceful enjoyment of their gardens? I have never worked from home, but wouldn't it be considered a GDPR breach if others can hear?

They have had friends over for BBQs the previous 2 nights and have been sitting outside chatting until around 9pm. The BBQ smell lingered for so long and of course they were all vaping and drinking alcohol. One of their friends was regaling them with tales of her dating escapades-hardly an appropriate topic for my 9 year old to have in earshot. I also don't want my kids damaging their lungs inhaling all of those disgusting vape particles. The women have also been prancing around in very skimpy bikinis. I know women are entitled to wear what they want, but come on-all the neighbours can see if they look outside their upstairs windows! I'm also concerned as yesterday, the visiting friends were there for several hours and appeared to drive themselves home- were they over the limit?

On both occasions, I have brought my kids inside, as I don't want them to hear the sordid details of their conversations. I also feel awkward that they are only a few metres away from me, so I don't want to have my dinner outside in case they listen to our conversation. Would I be unreasonable to pop over or post a note through their door requesting that we have an outdoor mealtime rota so we can all enjoy our gardens in peace-as we are entitled to?

Ground rules? You can’t set rules for someone else in their own garden! If you don’t like it then you have to be the one to go inside unfortunately. They are not behaving badly or anything out the ordinary so yabvu

Are you actually that spiteful you’d try and cost someone their job?

You need to reclaim your space. It isn't fair on your child not to be able to use their garden especially with summer holidays coming up. I'd let them play out and if that means said neighbour needs to work inside well then fair enough. I'm not bothered by what my neighbours where but if you are then attach a screen etc. to the fence.

Our garden unfortunately backs on to several others and only one family behaves this way. My dh used to keep the kids in because their dog would go off on one and the dad would do meetings outside. We put a screen up on that side of the fence so the dog couldn't see them.We are still considerate, they aren't out before 9am and if I hear or see screaming they are bought back in, otherwise they have a right to enjoy their garden just as anyone else does.

If a neighbour suggested set times for using our garden, I would decline.

So many bitching threads about the same topic : buy a detached house in the sticks if you don’t want to hear or see your flipping neighbours. Entitled people bitching out equally entitled people.

I think it was the work convos she was referring to and confidentiality.

OP please do come back and let us know how your DH gets on we can all do with a laugh! I suggest you pour yourself a nice drink have a cold shower and calm yourself down stress is not good in this heat !

I work at home with my office window open in this weather so I'm sure my neighbours can possibly hear my meetings as well. Don't really care.

Also you can't police what people talk about in their own gardens.

If you moved to the US to a home with a Home Owners Association it would suit you down to the ground. I expect you'd be on the management team in no time. Imagine the power you'd have over the neighbours. It would be so very you!

What will he do with that information? Write to the company and tell them that their employee has a social life?

Kindly, OP, I think the two of you need to try and reinvigorate your own lives. It's very easy to fall into a rut when you have young children.

It’s that bucket woman, quick shut the curtains!

I would play death metal rock in my garden. Then put noise cancelling headphones on and just use my garden. We have annoying neighbours too. As they were noisy I never made my children be quiet, they didn’t.
But noice cancelling headphones are your friend.

I think listening all day to a loud person on work meetings in the garden is unreasonable.

Very reasonable to block it out with your radio playing.

If he is advertising company business to the neighbours he should be careful.

I sometimes think what a nightmare it would be to live between Hyacinth and Victor Meldrew.

I don't suppose your DC would be remotely interested in the conversations next door, let them play out I expect the noise they make will drown out the very boring teams meeting and he might be forced to go indoors. Similarly if they have visitors to talk to why would they be listening to your conversation, just live your life as you want. If you didn't want close neighbours you bought the wrong house, it doesn't sound like they are doing anything terrible and these days most people have a designated driver that doesn't drink (this time).

Yes .. it would be like an episode or desperate housewives with this wannabe Bree van de kamp/ Katherine mayfair typr climbing her way to the top..only to be outsted by a rival complaining about her children playing in the garden....
Coming to the channel 5 afternoon film

Why????

Because people shouldn’t be hearing about private business affairs because their neighbours have turned the garden into an office.

Are you mad?

During COVID 2020 summer the one nice thing was seeing neighbours in their gardens. My elderly neighbour would sit out at her table and chairs enjoying the sun, reading her newspapers and chat over the fence to me and my then toddler. My neighbours the other side are a large family of elderly couple and adult children who hate our dog. However they would be out gardening, sitting in the sun, chatting. Meanwhile id be there with chalks, kids paints and massive paper, cardboard and crayons, a pop up tent and tunnel, a paddling pool. Neighbours further down sat out in the evening having barbecues and drinks and playing music.

I love living in a city with the hustle and bustle of other people around me if I didn't I'd love in the countryside, maybe try that?

Get a portable speaker and put some music on when your kids play outside. Doesn’t need to be loud, just enough so you can’t hear the unsuitable chat?
maybe planting / trellis to screen the prancing !!

Why? What do you want it for? Please don’t contact his employer. If you do, you are a horrible person

Reading as: Update hubbie stalked neighbour and instead of having a mature conversation with a new neighbour is now baying for his blood and going to try ruin his career.

But the op said it was her DC’s that heard the teams conversations, would they able to pick up what and who was being discussed.
It seems the op, who thinks even a trampoline is antisocial, is looking to cause trouble for her neighbours when all they are doing is using the garden in a new build estate.
The Op seems to be grasping at straws to cause trouble, bringing up the fact that one of the guests drove home, when she has absolutely no idea what they were drinking, kind of proves this

I WFH and have many teams calls, none of which are confidential - usually just my boss with 'have you done X/Y/Z', or discussing a team event we need to organise or similar. Basically just because you can overhear someone on Teams does not mean that it is confidential information.

We're not going to contact his employer or the ICO at this point, I'm not a vindictive person! We are just gathering evidence and starting to make a note of dates etc in case the situation escalates or if we need to contact the council about their behaviour/the noise.

Report them to the council for what exactly? Socialising on their garden on a sunny day? They’ve done nothing wrong.

Nothing you have said would merit reporting them to the council.
Using their garden in summer is not a crime.
What would you be reporting to the council?