AIBU to object to my partner wearing his late father's underwear?

[whyohwhyisitalwayswet]

As the title says, am I being unreasonable to object to my partner wearing his (late) father's underwear?

His father died a few years ago, and his mother gave him lots of quite nice clothes of his father's to have. I recently discovered that he'd also inherited his father's underwear which he is now wearing! He claims it has been washed countless times and is in good condition, so he doesn't get why I would object. But, I do....! Would you??

Whats the problem if nothing wrong with it? How do you know that you aren’t buying dead people’s clothes when you shop in a charity shop?!?

Has he considered that he may have been conceived in them? Or that the best part of him could actually be a stain on said underpants???

Well if his dad liked having sex whilst keeping his pants on 😕

They're his dad's old pants; not his mum's best frillies

Unless it's a top-half only garment, you can't buy any second-hand clothes without knowing if they once were nestled directly against somebody's nether regions - if they went commando when wearing them.

They could even have had a major code-brown-style accident (one layer wholly insufficient) whilst wearing an everyday pair of trousers and besmirched those in a likewise manner too (before washing them, of course).

Ignoring the fact it’s his father and he’s passed…

a grown man wearing another man’s pants is weird. Is he struggling for money? If so, that makes sense as men’s pants are expensive I suppose.

I wouldn’t even pass down my son’s pants to his younger cousin, because well, they’re pants.

I'm sure they're a normal size and not some kind of 2-man ridge-pants of the style you could maybe get on special order from Go Outdoors, in which that would actually be possible!

Would you say the same about their bed, or their house, or indeed the county they lived in - stay well away from all of them, in case you should happen to see or touch the place (as in location, not body part) where you might have been conceived?!

You could say the same about Olio and similar schemes, though. Even if somebody is very comfortable financially, a lot of people just hate the idea of perfectly good, useful stuff being needlessly sent to landfill.

Hrft but Ick, even if new and unworn, completely unreasonable I know but definitely ick..

I'm a big fan of passing clothes onto someone else but I draw the line at underwear that's gross. My older sister turned up at my house with a load of knickers that belonged to her friend who had sadly died.

But she couldn't understand why I didn't want her knickers. She chucked them at me and said they would be ok for DD. DD has a health condition so no I'm not putting second hand underwear on her. Told her to wear them herself.

Huh?

I meant he’s obviously quite frugal

Looking back, I see you were using 'pretty' as a qualifier before the ellipsis - but I wrongly assumed it was a typo and you'd meant to say that he was petty, before adding careful with his money as a separate point.

Ignore me!!!

I agree - it’s not remotely logical. I just couldn’t do it. I think the vast majority couldn’t / wouldn’t.

I don’t think Olio is similar - one is food which hasn’t been eaten, simply leftover (if that’s what I’m thinking it is?), the other are worn pants which would have bodily fluid near/on them. I know you can wash them, I know it’s again illogical.

Just a hard no for me.

Oh. I have and treasure some hand embroidered pillowcases from my mum and my great aunt. I think I honor them both by using the bed linen.

But what if, say, it's a 25kg sack of potatoes from which 10kg have been eaten, but the remainder are about to go on the turn if not eaten quickly?

Suppose a pair of pants should be expected to stay perfectly good and functional for 5 years (with regular washing, of course), and they've been worn already but only for 2 years... it seems the same principle to me!

I wouldn’t like it but couldn’t give a convincing argument why

thats odd and not right.

Underwear, no way. It’s such an inexpensive garment I do not see the benefit of this, and quite frankly some things should not be recycled and used by another - underwear is one of them.

I am not a clean freak but I read underwear should be replaced every 6 months anyway, and even thorough washes don’t get rid of all the bacteria. Considering underwear inevitably collects fluids and bacteria from parts of the body that need the most hygiene attention, I don’t think it’s right to wear someone else’s.

My partner wears his late father’s jumpers and it gives me the ick. Because I used to see his dad in them. And they are old man jumpers. But I think he finds done comfort in it so I don’t say anything. Underwear would be different though, I’d have to say something.

I would sleep on sheets someone else had slept on (after they’ve been washed), if away from home but I wouldn’t buy second hand sheets for my house.

Sheets are not tight fitting around your genitals. Even if you sleep naked, they wouldn’t be as close to the area of your body where you poo and wee as underwear is.

It's really not. Food is not personal to a person in the same way clothing is.

Logically it shouldn't matter, but lots of things aren't logical and people still react to them. People know that tiny spiders can't hurt them but will jump out of their skin at one regardless. Logically it's just fabric, but all I would think is dead man's pants, and that for me is just weird and slightly creepy.

My granny was a tailor and regularly adjusted the underwear and clothing of a well known Lord. I once googled the brand and to my surprise each pair of underpants cost £150.00! He was a regular customer who asked her to adjust his clothing as he gained and lost weight over a number of years. You can do this easily with good quality clothing.

If the pants are a good quality brand, perhaps your husband does not want to see them go to landfill. They could also have been a gift to your father in law which was never used and that your mother in law discovered after he had passed away.

Wash with a new red towel, and hopefully that’ll put a stop to it.

They would slowly be finding their way to the bin…

6 months! Blimey. Many of my pants are years old. I see no reason to chuck them out as they’re not stained or holey. I never get thrush or UTIs (touchwood) so will continue to wear the ones I’ve got.