AIBU to struggle with neighbours' children screaming while working from home?

[fld]

One of the few things I am not looking forward to the next few days are screaming kids.

Two families that moved late last year and earlier this year have 5-6 kids between them and all they do is scream! They run outside and scream. As the properties are in an odd shaped quadrangle, their screams bounce off the walls. Making the screaming even more intense. The kids’ ages, c3-9 years old.

My job is hybrid, so didn’t get this issue last summer as properties the kids live in - one didn’t have kids and the other had kids and behaved.

I had to close a window to keep the screaming down. There is no way I would close a window when it’s 31c.

I do wish parents would tell their kids that screaming is not acceptable. My work is two thirds on calls ti various customers, other staff in other departments and my team’s colleagues. I can hear the screaming from wearing the call headset.

Any tips will be appreciated

It is reasonable to expect quiet enjoyment of your home though - the screaming my former neighbours children could produce ruined that as well as making it hard to work from home.

Most of us aren't asking for library levels of silence, just normal, respectful levels of background noise without ear piercing screaming, repetitive crashing and banging - levels of noise if an adult were producing them would unquestionably be deemed unreasonable.

And yes, I do mean screaming, as other posters have commented, small girls having 'who can scream the loudest' competitions, I really am not talking about normal levels of laughter or conversation here.

We don't all have the option to just 'go to the office' the company i sub contract for has an office space for 6 people, in London. I am not and have never been office based and live 100s of miles away!

I could stop working for this company of course... and then claim out of work benefits as I am disabled and am not actually obliged to work at all!

I beg to differ.

If you're not able to work from home then ask your manager to ensure there is a desk for you at the office, surely?

There must be someone else who has a suitable home situation they can work from.

YANBU at all.

When I was a child, we didn’t scream when we were playing out. We’d have been brought in sharpish if we had. My kids didn’t scream either, and when I worked in a nursery if the children were screaming they were told to stop. No one wants to hear it.

I can guarantee that I will be woken up, between 7.30 and 8.00am tomorrow, by the kids over the road bouncing on their trampoline screaming and making a right noise. Their selfish parents give no fucks about the rest of us in the street, the poor woman next door to them has a newborn and might be getting a tiny bit of sleep then. But nope. We all have to be awake listening to their kids screaming. It pisses me right off.

Noise cancelling headphones - the ones that block outside noise but you can hear your call?

teams and most other video calling platforms will block out most external noise. I’m surprised how well it works. Keep a fan running as white noise to stop it annoying you?

Yes, that happens round here. Sometimes one parent takes a group of them to the park. We have some children with SEND in the area, so have worked on different strategies to support everyone, so sometimes take them for days away. We would never let them scream at the time-just like barking dogs, people have to expect the odd bit of noise, but excessive, ongoing noise is not fair.

Hmm, personally I think it's highly likely that if someone says kids are screaming all the time, they are in fact screaming all the time. I can't imagine many people (misophonia aside) actually dislike the sound of kids playing generally, the trouble imo is the way constant screaming is normalised as an integral part of playing.

Seems like you are not compatible with suburban life, consider moving rurally.

It does sound annoying. Difficult to adjust to that type of noise. Can you try white noise or noise cancelling headphones?

Sorry, things have moved on somewhat, been like this for some years now. People work from home...

Then there's always the other people who go to work at night, people like my neighbour, a midwife who works night shifts. So she's not allowed to have any peace or chance of sleep because parent's can't parent? What an entitled attitude to have, everyone else should suffer their own children screaming. I presume you have screaming children.

Yep, and it's often so they don't have to listen to it (or at least not at the same volume) themselves. I once posted a thread about kids round here screaming in the way you describe, and amidst the oh-so-original cries of 'move to the middle of nowhere then', 'I suppose you'd rather they were indoors on screens?' etc etc, one poster literally informed me straight-faced (so to speak) that parents 'put their kids outside because that kind of screaming is intolerable indoors'. Like it's just something kids do and there's no way of stopping them. The entitlement of mindsets like that is off the scale, kids annoy them indoors so they put them out to annoy everybody else. And then it's those who object to the screaming who are accused of not being community-minded. 🙄

Nobody, working at home or otherwise should be forced to live in their home with every window closed, earplugs or whatever in order to do what they want to do in their home because of screaming children.

It's inconsiderate and bringing up brats. They wouldn't be allowed to scream at school all day, in the shops with parents, in the car with parents, why on earth is it ok in a garden where there are neighbours nearby?

No-one's home environment should be so loud that it disturbs then to the point they can't work.

My neighbours children are so loud they can be heard through double glazing and I had subtitles on the TV at one point
i couldn’t go into the office as work burned down briefly, we couldn’t work from a cafe and I couldn’t afford a co working space on min wage. It was not a joyous summer that year and my neighbour who works nights was shattered
my garden was unusable unless I wore noise cancelling earphones and earplugs together

I feel your pain! I grew up in the suburbs and have no issue with the noise of kids playing (my own do too). I genuinely doesn’t bother me even when I’m wfh. But my neighbours daughters SCREAM! Like they’re being chased by a bear into the arms of Harry Styles. Like they’re couldn’t scream louder if they were paid a million quid too. Am lucky that our windows are pretty sound proof so it doesn’t doesn’t disturb me wfh but the odd sunny evening when I’m sitting outside having a glass of wine a sudden high pitched scream will make me jump (and occasionally shout out “Jaysus” in reaction).
Their poor mum has tried her best, I’ve heard her bring them indoors and tell them to stop screaming so many times. She’s talked to me about it - she’s like “wtf, we didn’t scream like this when we were kids”.
I put the headphones on and google sound proof fencing… and thank the lord I have boys. Yes, they’re loud but they don’t do that horror movie screaming that my neighbours kids do.
In every other way my neighbours are just the best - the dad drove me and my son to the hospital in a medical emergency. I can count on them for anything- but if one of their daughters wins an award for best movie scream in the future I won’t be surprised!

Oh yes they do. We have one next door. Inside the house and out it's relentless and no, nothing wrong with the child, just shit parents. During a work call, work even asked my partner who the screaming kid was (heard through the wall).

I had neighbours who had 4 kids and numerous friends screaming constantly one summer
I opened my patio doors and played rap music really really loud on my tv through the sound bar

I went out and left it playing for several hours on repeat

did it a few times as soon as they started screaming and all of a sudden - no noise the kids fucked off to the park to play

Your home is not a property designed to be an office it is in an area with homes. Children playing outside during the day is normal. Good infact. Work from your office

Little bastards and useless parents. My DS had to go to the park if he wanted to scream. He wasnt allowed to scream at home. I dont scream at home either!
Can you get some noise blocking headphones? They are really good now.

That's an issue to raise with your employer.

Also, screaming all the time? 9-5 there are kids constantly screaming? They don't stop to eat or whatever?

@fld I do agree with you that children screaming is fucking annoying. Not just playing and enjoying themselves, but really shrill, harsh, high pitched screaming. ALL DAY!

Just had to put up with it in my garden all day today as my neighbour (back garden joins onto mine) had her 2 kids and 3 others from closeby (age 4 to 8) at her house, on the trampoline, and the big inflatable castle, an inflatable pool, and a swing and slide set. 9am to 5pm, non stop screaming. I put my headphones on with my music on, but it didn't drown them out. I went for a walk a couple of times to escape it.

It will be the same tomorrow, as it's the same on every dry day that is over 20C and they're not at school. The mayday bank holiday (at the end) was torture. 3 days of banshees screeching, and adults who don't seem to be able to hear them. I was forced out ALL DAY on the Bank Holiday Monday because my nerves could not take a 3rd day of the screaming. It even goes on inside the house. They keep running from the house to the garden and back, and rinse and repeat... ALWAYS SCREAMING. Well, 90% of the time. They do stop to eat and for a wee now and again!

I am going out to a woodland for a long walk tomorrow. I feel fucked off at being forced out of my own home and garden because of feral children. But I can't do it again tomorrow. My nerves are frazzled.

I guess you can't complain that any given noise is disrupting your working, because that is a risk you take working from home, but I am on your side here because I agree that people need to start to learn to parent their children!

I pray that the schools don't close this coming week because of the predicted severe heat. If they do, hopefully it will be too bastard hot for them outside!

Try working nights during summer 😩

Just to add that kids shouldn’t be screaming all day. My kids are not allowed to scream! Laugh, talk etc. ok. One quick scream due to a tickle or something funny is ok. But continued screaming - no.

If my kids have been at school for 7 hours following rules and schedules, then they can play however they want to for a couple of hours after school. Children don’t have to stay quiet for the sake of adults working in a residential area. Go back to your office!!!