Inconsequential but HIGHLY irritating things your DH does

[itslikecakesbutitsnotcakes]

I’m not talking ‘fails to do any housework’ or ‘won’t parent his own kids’ but minor irritations that make you want to scream but you can’t because its so petty. For me

Refuses to use the automatic windscreen wiper. Instead he waits until he has no visibility and then manually flips the wiper on once. In heavy rain he’s doing it every couple of seconds. Just put the bloody auto wipers on!!

Unloads the dishwasher but leaves select things stacked up ‘near’ the cupboard or drawer they live in rather than putting them away. Apparently they are left there to ‘thoroughly dry’.

Rage!!!

I do so many of the things listed in this thread. I was going to defend one or two but there are too many now.

Personally I think the most annoying kind of person to live with is someone who's as easily irritated as most MNers.

Our set of three ‘aesthetic’ rustic chopping boards - small, medium and large sized - live propped against the wall next to the toaster in size order.

He always stacks them in the reverse order with the largest one at the front and the smaller two behind it. Look’s astonished and baffled when informed that this isn’t right.

Breathing….

Argh, the water in the washing up bowl! My DH does this! I’m forever tipping a centimetre of water from the bowl into the plug hole. Drives me nuts for some reason.

...isn't this what draining boards are for?? I leave stuff to dry on there all the time!

Uses a dirty or greasy plate as a tray to carry jars from table to kitchen after a meal. Then doesn't wipe the bottoms of the jars properly or at all.

Gets water everywhere when washing anything in a sink or basin but never wipes it down afterwards. I say never, but if wiping does occur once in a blue moon he will use a very wet sponge and then not dry the surface. Either it dries with loads of water marks or I will discover the wet surface when arriving with hands full of stuff needing a dry surface to put it on.

Bless him.

I've never met a man who can hang washing out properly. It's almost like they go out of their way to throw it on and bunch it up in the most cack-handed way possible, as if achieving maximum creasing and the poorest level or air circulation around the garment is the desired outcome.

Same!!! and then afterwards says "I love sneezing" WTAF?!

Leaves the sponge in the sink without squeezing it whenever he uses it for anything. They get manky and smelly quickly if you do that, as they never actually dry.

No court would convict me.

Mine can not speak to me all day then decide, when I'm at that juggling point just before everything has finished cooking but still have a couple of tasks because often it's 3 different meals and DS2 needs his special pudding with his medicine in preparing, that he has a load of incredibly important stuff of zero consequence to tell me about or show me.

I’m picturing him shaking off like a dog every couple of minutes

The windscreen wiper one drives me insane too! “I can see!”, he exclaims! Can you? What about small children or objects in the road? Why wear contact lenses if you’re happy doing this? Drives me mad too!

He has the ability to precisely predict which cabinet or drawer I will need next in the kitchen and then leans up against it so I can't get into it without asking him to move. Cheeses me off have to repeatedly say "can I get in there?", and then he gets the huff that I keep interrupting his monologue. Oh and he refuses to speak or answer me if he's in the loo. I can be outside with an emergency but he won't talk whilst in the bathroom. Not even to tell me that he's in there!

Pushes food around his plate 2-3 times before he puts it in his fork and eats it. No idea why he does it, doesn’t make a difference what it is, he is just incapable of taking a forkful of food without giving it a little nudge first

Mine always focuses on my tasks and gives a running commentary on what l should be doing instead of focussing on his own tasks- this culminated in him arriving at Dover for the ferry without his passport,l let him writhe a bit then produced it.

Why?

I do this. Sometimes there is so much noise in my head that I need to talk over it so I can hear. The thing is, I keep finding myself doing it in the shops 🤭

I can't work out why it is so frustrating. Also can't work out why the tap can't be angled to go straight down the plug...

Leaves the loo roll in the middle of the bathroom floor after he's used it rather than putting it back on the holder. Gives me the rage.

My DH is great- he doesn't work due to health reasons, I work full time at home as a childminder- he does all the housework and cooking, diy etc. I do banking, finances, present buying, life admin etc. Only me and him in the house.
But he still annoys me! Yes to the windscreen wipers- what is that all about??
He does all the laundry on a Friday
He hangs tops on clothes hangers and hangs them on the line. But they all bunch together so they never dry in the middle- I've told him so many times but he still does it! I've now bought some special hooks for the hangers so it keeps them apart...
He loves motorbikes, I don't. He restores them as hobby. I don't know anything about them, I'm not interested in them at all. Yet after every session in the shed, he'll come and waffle to me about it. Every nut and bolt,from start to finish- I'm not interested and don't really care. But he'll start his waffling off by saying " I know you're not interested but...."and still proceed to tell me about it! Now I have my own hobbies and he's not interested in so I never speak to him about them but he just doesn't get it...
And then, when I'm trying to quietly do my hobbies...he'll come and waffle in my ear about anything and everything that I really don't want to hear about....or silly videos on his phone that I don't want to see....every single time! I actually said to him, I swear you do it on purpose-I can't be left in peace for 5 minutes!
He'll message me from the shed, even when I'm working and say " Any chance of a cuppa? I'm a bit busy down here!"
Yep, cos I've only got 3 toddlers to look after...

I do this, is it wrong?! Makes sense to me, particularly with bowls as it’s easier to stack them one behind the other. I hate getting my fingers mucky 🤣

He is a fantastic bloke and is currently looking after me very well post OP. I love him dearly.
But he will never return anything. By which I mean he says "Have you got a pair of tweezers (umbrella, moisturiser, insulated carrier bag whatever) and I give it to him and then it is his -never to be seen again by me.

Also I am apparently the only person with the ability to put the cardboard inside bit from the toilet roll in the recycling.

I thought the stirring was the worst but he’s now taken it upon himself to violently shake any chips, veg, stir-fry etc that’s in the air fryer.
FEW-MIN.

I think several people are married to my husband!

He does the laundry hanging thing - as far as I can tell, he'll take any two points on the garment (not shaken out, of course), position these roughly 8 inches apart on the line, and apply the clothes pegs.

Another strange habit is that he'll carry on conversing with you while wandering around into different rooms, so it goes from, "Oh darling did you hear that the neighbours at number 9 were looking for muffled mumble ᵐᵘᵐᵇˡᵉ ᵈᶦˢᵗᵃⁿᵗ ᶜʰᵘⁿᵗᵉʳᶦⁿᵍ ᵈᵒʷⁿ ᵗʰᵉ ˢᵗᵃᶦʳˢ ᵃⁿᵈ ᵗʰʳᵒᵘᵍʰ ʷᵃˡˡˢ..."

But the most annoying thing, which seems to be getting worse, is what DC call his "Open-itis" - he just can't seem to properly close anything. Doors and drawers goes without saying. But also the bread bin, biscuit barrel, bottles, packets, cartons, tupperware etc. We constantly have products doing dry when they should be moist, soggy when they should be crisp, etc. Our laundry detergent comes in soluble sheets, the packets clearly warn to re-seal firmly so they don't absorb moisture from the air: does he fuck, and to top it off doesn't put the lid fully back on the laundry-stuff box and then doesn't properly put the laundry-stuff box back in the under sink cupboard and then the under sink cupboard door can't be closed completely...

My husband yells at me from the other end of the house and then when I yell back 'Yes? What?' He can't hear me. So I go to the top/bottom of the stairs as appropriate and yell louder 'Yessssss??? WHAT???'

Nothing. Radio silence. So I go back to what I am doing. Two mins later 'Cookbooooook!!!!!' 'Yes!!!! WHAT?!!! AGAIN, WHAT???' Still nothing.

Why is it I can hear him from that distance but he can't hear me?

Just fucking find me and speak normally or STFU. I'm not coming running like a beckoned dog.