To not want to exercise

[beewaspfly]

help me out here. Wrong side of 40, in the thick of perimenopause. All of my friends, and I mean all, have started exercising like crazy in the past few years- even the ones I’d least expect. My GP keeps telling me I HAVE to start strength training or I’ll have an unbearable later life.

but…I don’t want to. It’s just so tedious. I hate the gym, hate PT even more, hate classes (have tried several), hate home work outs, even the short ones. I don’t get any endorphin rush from it or whatever. The prospect of doing it ruins my day - it’s better if I do it first thing but even then I hate every minute.

id rather just be walking somewhere nice, meeting friends, working, napping, catching up on tv and eating amazing food with my family, reading and enjoying my life without the sense of impending dread.

im size 10, love to walk for HOURS every day, slim but not really toned (ok, a bit flabby in some areas), feel pretty healthy on the whole. Can’t I just keep doing what I’m doing? Please??

my mum is in her 70s and fine doing what I do, although she has had some falls lately. Dad says he wish he’d worked out as he’s such a weedy skinny old man now (his words). But they’re fine. My grandmother is in her 90s and going strong.

why do I have to do this? Why is everyone else doing this? Someone tell me one good reason and I’ll stop moaning

You could do 10 minutes a day at home with dumbbells. That would make a huge difference.

You enjoy walking so crack on with that. I think we always try to avoid something that we don’t enjoy. I paid my gym subscription for years but went maybe twice a year, I absolutely hated it so I’d find any excuse not to go. Then I started to go to classes, yoga in particular and I love it, I’m there all the time now. Might be worth a try if you haven’t already. And I walk listening to an audiobook or podcast, love doing that. Haven’t been in the gym for years but can’t be doing with something I don’t enjoy.

I hate exercise too. Always have, always will. I forced myself to go to the gym four times a week for nearly 20 years and hated every minute of it.

Have you ever tried Zumba? It's really good fun and hard work with the right instructor. I do it on line now as I've moved to the middle of nowhere. I use dance fit. They also do other dance based classes and pilates.

Reformer Pilates is also great, it builds strength but not as boring as going weights. I go once a week and feel stronger already.

Walking is exercise

You can do what you want. But, your mum isn’t fine as she’s had some falls, probably caused by reduced muscle strength (along with other factors). Your dad is telling you he wishes he’d done more. If these things don’t give you a kick up the bum, then nothing will.

Why don’t you give lifting a chance? If you can afford a trainer, do a few sessions with a trainer so they can write you a programme and help you with your technique. I was a reluctant strength trainer years ago, now I absolutely love it.

I think only a small amount of strength training is needed to have an impact. Could you habit stack? Do squats whilst the kettle boils? Stand in one leg whilst you clean your teeth that kind of thing.

I do pilates/yoga which is different each time, but hate the gym and repetitive exercises. I work from home and have weights and a step in the room I work and will do exercise snacks.

It does feel like everyone has become obsessed with being ultra fit and toned. If you hate it, I'd aim for the bare minimum and go for variety. My motivation is seeing my parents losing their strength/mobility in their late 70s.

Why not just walk more? My Mum was a teacher so on her feet lots, used to walk to and from work and has kept up the walking in her retirement (including walking holidays including long distance walks). She's never been to a gym or exercise class in her life but in her late 70s is as fit as a fiddle. Walking definitely counts as exercise, especially if you are carrying stuff while you do it.

it doesn’t really hit the areas you need to need to be hitting as you get older - full body muscles etc

I used to be you!!!! I absolutely hated feeling 'in my body' too, it made me stressed and grumpy.

Anyway I was feeling off due to peri so had a huge panel of blood tests, a hormone test (Dutch test) and a dark night of the soul - I had two kids in two years and had neglected myself.

Soooo..I started going to the gym, I probably spent the first 6 months on the treadmill, doing calm yoga classes and in the sauna but I made a habit of it at least.

Then I made the leap to Pilates, and then to a strength and conditioning class and I've never looked back. It's been 1.5 years now and I'm seeing huge progress.

Slow and steady wins the race. I knew I wasn't going to get in the gym and start throwing weights around and being really energetic. I had to learn what my body was capable of step by step.

I feel SO MUCH better now.

Long walks sound great to me, why don't you just pop on some ankle weights or even a weight vest to add value!

Maybe you should look into it, because they’re modern places - not farming communities without modern sensibilities. They’re not walking up enormous hills or doing anything more than gentle walking. I think lots of people in an area reaching over 100 years old does reflect a general better state of health. They’re not dying of heart attacks at 75 years old because they haven’t exercised enough.

A few years ago I would walk / hike for miles, esp during lockdown. We had just got a new dog and I was out of work, so we would just walk for hours. However, this did absolutely nothing for my weight or strength. I'm sure it was good for lungs, heart etc which is great, but I was always still a little overweight.

I am also now back into spinning, and am trying my best to do kettlebells, and I am much stronger and weigh less (I know weight loss isn't an issue for you) - could you start with kettlebells? They're a little less annoying than traditional weights. I bought them in nice colours and that does help.

Also during lockdown, I was hooked on the daily Mr. Motivator TV appearances where he showed novices how to do weights correctly. Weights for idiots like me, if you will.

I'm the same, I hate lifting weights and being at the gym, tried it numerous times and hate it. My friends do circuit training, they say they love it and some, imo, have become unhealthily obsessed with it but it's not for me, I am 53 and know what I like and don't like.

I've followed the blue zones for ages. Most of these people live long healthy lives without the need of a gym but like you (and me) they walk everywhere. They also swim, work hard in the garden and move a lot. So that's what I do, move and walk. I've also started to wear a weighted vest and ankle weights. I might also get some wrist weights too, it must all help and contribute towards strengthening my bones.

Only read OP posts.
Do you ever increase your heart rate - I mean more than just walking?
The “good reason” is that there is lots of evidence that any sort of regular exercise improves your health both in the short and long term.

Two family members have had hospital stays recently and needed care afterwards.

One has had “bad luck” and the other has a self-induced illness (think lung cancer from smoking).

Family and friends have pitched in to care for both, including cancelling holidays and postponing events to allow them to do so.

Those who have cared for the “bad luck” patient are so much softer, empathetic and understanding about giving their time and energy to care.

On the other side, there is a lot of anger from the people looking after the self-induced patient (though not when they’re with them) I truly think they’re going to need therapy after this. “Why did they do X, knowing it would make them ill?” “Why did they not do Y, knowing it would make them healthier?” “Did they not love us enough to want to live?” “This illness and financial hardship has been caused by their selfishness.”

Not everyone wants to look after their own health, or battle their addictions or do the difficult thing now (like exercise) to potentially improve the future, just don’t pretend that by not looking after your own health you are not affecting anyone else.

I don't think anyone is claiming that lack of strength training means you'll die of a heart attack at 75. Longevity and muscle/bone health aren't the same thing. The question was whether walking alone is sufficient to preserve muscle mass and bone density as we age. Living to 100 doesn't automatically answer that question.

Multiple studies are showing that walking alone simply isnt enough to preserve bone density https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK71937/? https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/18602880/

Walking is excellent for health and may help some aspects of bone health, but the claim that gentle walking alone is enough to prevent age related bone loss is stronger than the evidence supports.

To be fair to OP, she is talking about the difference between walking and strength training.

Just a quick point - sugar in the gut could have an effect on how your brain receives endorphins. It doesn’t mean you don’t make them, you might just be blocking them.

Anger about exercise might need a bit of unpicking, you might have a demand about, “I shouldn’t have to do this,” which could use some work.

How do you feel about it gardening, digging and DIY? My mum created a “rockery” garden in her 40s, expanded her vegetable patch and got a cast iron roller for the lawn. She was still going in her 80s.

It is strength training with a purpose!

I absolutely hate exercise.

I wasted years and years doing what everyone will tell you to do - try things out, find something you love. Turns out that doesn't exist.

But I thought carefully about the health benefits and decided to do it anyway

In my head, it's like brushing my teeth. I don't enjoy that and I don't expect to but I found a way to fit it in.

I WFH three days a week and do 2 x 15 mins of weights on those days - you tube videos at home. I started with 5 min videos

I still don't enjoy it but I do enjoy the results - I love feeling stronger. I can carry my 7 year old on my shoulders, I stopped being able to do that with my older one when he was 3.

The places I am talking about are called blue zones. The people in these places do not lack bone density into old age, and the only exercise credited is walking, gardening and sitting on the floor.

You can do what you want but don’t moan about broken bones when you get older or poor balance because you haven’t done anything about it now. Don’t rely on being a carbon copy of your parents, my grandmother lived to 100 and I always assumed my mum and aunts would do too, most of them died before reaching 80. Good news is you can always take up exercise later in life and you can add in little things now like standing on one leg while brushing your teeth which will help balance. Walking is only good exercise if you walk fast enough to raise your heart rate but it’s better than nothing.

I feel the same. I know I should do it but can’t be arsed. I try to do 5000+ steps every day but that’s probably it. I half heartedly start a routine then give up a few days later. I wish it gave me pleasure but it doesn’t.

Keep walking then and take Menopace from Vitabiotics, is very good