To not want to exercise

[beewaspfly]

help me out here. Wrong side of 40, in the thick of perimenopause. All of my friends, and I mean all, have started exercising like crazy in the past few years- even the ones I’d least expect. My GP keeps telling me I HAVE to start strength training or I’ll have an unbearable later life.

but…I don’t want to. It’s just so tedious. I hate the gym, hate PT even more, hate classes (have tried several), hate home work outs, even the short ones. I don’t get any endorphin rush from it or whatever. The prospect of doing it ruins my day - it’s better if I do it first thing but even then I hate every minute.

id rather just be walking somewhere nice, meeting friends, working, napping, catching up on tv and eating amazing food with my family, reading and enjoying my life without the sense of impending dread.

im size 10, love to walk for HOURS every day, slim but not really toned (ok, a bit flabby in some areas), feel pretty healthy on the whole. Can’t I just keep doing what I’m doing? Please??

my mum is in her 70s and fine doing what I do, although she has had some falls lately. Dad says he wish he’d worked out as he’s such a weedy skinny old man now (his words). But they’re fine. My grandmother is in her 90s and going strong.

why do I have to do this? Why is everyone else doing this? Someone tell me one good reason and I’ll stop moaning

TBH I think that the blanket messaging about exercising is ridiculous. My father-in-law is 90, gave up playing tennis badly decades ago and his only exercise is hauling 25kg bags of cement around his GF's garden. He's got plenty of muscle and travels all over the world in his endless spare time.

I, on the other hand, make very little muscle as did my own parents however hard I try. I keep supple with gentle exercise but I'm not going to do the things I'm told to do because they don't suit me.

If you want to prevent falls, taking excellent care of your feet is a great way to start. Bunions and dead skin build up are dreadful for balance and affect knees and hips. Wear flat shoes with a wide toe box and make sure your toes are straight and muscly.

Those countries generally have a much better diet which plays a huge part.

I was exactly the same until I discovered boxing 🥊
After years of doing different stuff, nothing I really got into to!
Now I’d do that 7 days a week if I could!
You need to try different things until you find something you like!

Diet definitely plays a part. I’m just basically
agreeing with the OP that she doesn’t have to do some intensive exercise regime to be healthy. It sounds like she’s inherited some good genes. She’s not just totally sedentary and overweight. I wouldn’t be forcing myself if I felt like her. She could make herself miserable and get hit by a bus in two years time 🤷‍♀️

I'm the same and older than you. Strength training is the thing now. In a few years it will be something else no doubt.

Credited by whom? The Blue Zone authors? Journalists? Documentary makers? Or studies that actually measured bone density and physical activity levels?

Lots of things have been credited for Blue Zone longevity- diet, social connections, purpose, genetics, lower smoking rates, lower obesity, community support. How do we know walking is the single factor preserving bone density?

There is a lot published on diets in blue zones but not as much on exercise - I did find this though "A study of men in the Sardinian Blue Zone found that their longer lives were associated with raising farm animals, living on steeper slopes in the mountains, and walking longer distances to work (41Trusted Source).
A study of more than 13,000 men showed that these habitual activities benefit them. The amount of distance they walked or stories of stairs they climbed each day predicted how long they would live (42Trusted Source).
Other studies have shown the benefits of exercise in reducing the risk of cancer, heart disease, and overall death."

Thats significantly more exercise than a short walk and a bit of gardening! Here: https://www.healthline.com/nutrition/blue-zones#TOC_TITLE_HDR_6

It’s a bit more than that. They’re generally less sedentary. They garden, they do housework with fewer ‘gadgets’, they carry shopping (often daily) without relying on delivery services. If you’re doing all that you’re probably doing a lot of the weight bearing exercise already. If you’re not, you probably aren’t.

I hate it too. Sorry I don't have the answer!

It seems to me that if you're size 10 and walking two hours a day, you're doing fine.

Is there any other form of exercise that you enjoy even occasionally, e.g. swimming, skating, cycling? Otherwise it seems to me you can carry right on as you are.

The thing is you can't see into the future this is preventative so if u get inflammation or arthritis and you struggle with joints if u strength train this will support joints or if u fall u will be able to get yourself up again !
I can guarantee you that if u need at some point to have strength and u haven't got any u will regret it big time !
Have U ever tried a cable machine and maybe your fav music ?
This is easy trust me but very beneficial! I'm nearly 50 and I have arthritis strength training has been lifesaving !!

its easy. If you have friends who nag you about you doing it. get different, less judgy friends. GP's can suggest things, but like your hairdresser or your gardener, you don't have to take up their suggestions. Life is too short to agonise.

this. Rememeber kale as the life saver?

I watched a documentary years ago, again about people who live to be over 100. Some of them didn’t particularly do any exercise at all. Some drank, some smoked, some didn’t. Some did more exercise than others. The only thing they all had in common was a general love of life.

Yes, the Sardinian blue zone has more farming, but that’s not the case for all of them. @BackToLurk I agree carrying shopping and other habits would definitely help.

My point is that an intensive exercise regime is not necessarily going to improve Op’s later life. She might not stick around as long as she could have if she hates her life because she dreads doing her exercise.

There’s a lot more going on in this delicate balance than eat this and do that and you’ll be healthy.

You can absolutely do 10 mins 3 times a week and that be of benefit. I saw a Ted talk about it. You need to lift heavy.
I have no more receipts for you, I'm afraid!

I should think that doing ANYTHING would make a difference. I can't lift weights because of a health condition, but I know that any stretching or balance work I do even for 5 minutes a couple of times a week makes a difference. Going to go and do some now!

Walking, gardening, doing housework, carrying shopping, hiking, dancing - that's exercise too. Maybe add cycling, swimming.

The older generation didn’t drive so much and walked way more. They also didn’t have things like online shopping so they’d walk around carrying heavy bags.

Your parents aren't fine, they are fragile,falls, fractures
. the biggest cause of hospitalisation for over 60s is falls.. Michael Mosleys "Just one thing",stand on one leg while cleaning your teeth. Walking has to be a decent pace. I'm 75, have 2 border collies, went up the South Downs yesterday for a couple of hours, I don't consider that exercise... nor do they. I was nursing over 40 years,I never got the bad back my colleges half my age suffered from. If you're slim and your parents "weedy" you might go that way, have they or you had none scans Trust me, Mother Nature is very good at giving you a warning eventually! Your grandparents didn't have the labour saving devices, they probably built good bone density. I had a mangle in the 70s, didn't drive,lived rural,cycled to shops,5 miles each way.

Maybe do some research into sarcopenia @beewaspfly

Sarcopenia is the progressive, age-related loss of skeletal muscle mass, strength, and function. Derived from Greek meaning "poverty of the flesh," it typically begins around age 30, with muscle mass decreasing by about 3–5% per decade, and often accelerates significantly after age 60

This is frailty when muscles waste away. It makes more likely to fall and lose our balance. Or lift heavy things and eventually struggle with opening jars and bottles.

It's possibly what's happened to your Mum.
She may also have osteoporosis with a broken shoulder from standing height.
Has she been assessed with a bone density scan?

This is why in their 80 many women lose their independence after a fall=broken hip or a broken wrist / can't drive properly again.

Exercise should be twofold- cardio exercise and muscle/ bone building exercise.

It's your choice what you do but just be aware of what will happen if you don't.

The goal is not to live to your 90s in a unhealthy state, housebound and immobile, but to have as many healthy years as possible.

Health is measured in 'healthy years' meaning no chronic diseases and no reliance on drugs for lifestyle-related diseases that are preventable.

I was shit at all this, but turns out I’m good at lifting weights.

it’s also non competitive so no pressure

two sessions a week would be fine, forty minutes will cover full body. Just do a few things and repeat, note your progress

Its important for functional ability as you age, and to avoid having to wear Skechers

You will need to go to the gym though to get heavy enough weights

Or, just ignore all this if you’re happy 😃

I'm with you Op. I absolutely detest exercise
I hate being out of breath
I hate being sweaty
I like swimming not the faff of it all
I have a dog so do walk more than I would do otherwise
I'm really conscious of ageing well and like you I'm seeing people around me getting more into exercise and feeling. I should throw myself into it as well, but I'd rather cut off my own head.
however I'm 45 now I can see my entire body turning to blancmange and I've put on 9 lb in the last couple of years so have completely new fat rolls and layers which I think will be the tipping point for me to do something about it - no idea what though

@Figgygal where does such a strong feeling come from?

I don't enjoy exercise at all, however my career as a nurse showed me that (whilst obviously not all illness can be mitigated), some people are 'elderly' before their time with poor mobility in a way that could have been avoided with a stronger and fitter body. As a result, I run and strength train three times a week. I genuinely don't enjoy it, however I do not want to find myself (45) in the same situation as my 60yo ex-H who is barely mobile due to lifestyle factors. I plan on many, many active years after an early retirement and this seems like the best way to invest in that.

Just being nosey, but what do you do every morning that lasts 25 mins? I struggle to find anything that feels effective that I can fit in under half an hour.

"And to avoid having to wear Skechers"

😂😂😂

If nothing else got me to the gym, this would!