I get the impression women have a massive blind spot about their own behaviour, whereas they're very critical of men.
I do agree with this.
Some one said previously that when they look back on times they've been treated badly by others in life it's been a fairly equal split between men and women. I'd agree with that too from my own experience.
It's just that a) the poor behaviour presents differently and b) the majority of people are heterosexual so most women will live.more closely with men rather than women. So men will have a greater impact on our lives.
There's also a strange dichotomy on MN whereby women will claim men are absent parents even within their own home and do nothing but when a man can't use a washing machine (or cook or dress their children or pack for a holiday or whatever) and someone says, "His mum never taught him," or "His mum does all his washing for him," or the wife insists on doing it because he won't be able to do it properly there's an outcry about blaming women for men's behaviour.
Well, if there are supposedly generations of men who can't use washing machines etc or were never allowed to do x, y, z because they werent any/as good at it, there won't be any men to teach their sons how to use washing machines etc and so if women are the default parents and women are the only ones who do these things actually it probably does fall to women to raise their sons differently. Especially if the husband/father isn't doing it. That's how you change it for the future generations.
You only have to read threads where a woman is complaining that her daughter in law hasn't done something (eg taken the childen to visit, allowed her to visit, babysit or whatever) to see that there are also a lot of women who hold other women to much higher parenting and domestic standards than men in the first place and see the home and family as a woman's domain.
Disclaimer: I did raise my son differently and I don't expect anyone other than him to be responsible for himself and I've never met a man who couldn't use a washing machine or expected me to 'mother' him.
Men are also heavily criticised for their 'socialisation' over which they have no control. Whereas women use their own socialisation as an 'excuse' because they had no control over it. Men are expected to just realise and instinctively know that their socialisation was wrong and detrimental to those around them and reject it. Whereas women are 'victims' of their socialisation and can't ever be expected to realise it as detrimental even to themselves.
Women are just as responsible for perpetuating the 'socialisation' as men. Yes, structural inequality exists and we are all raised within the patriarchy. Many people can see that this is just as detrimental to men and causes problems for both sexes, it just manifests differently. But within our own homes, we don't have to accept it.
But in terms of people being generally deceitful, self serving, manipulative, unkind etc they're human traits not male ones.