AIBU to worry that bringing chocolates to an interview was inappropriate?

[Thebigwideworld]

I think I’ve messed up the biggest opportunity I’ve ever had and cannot stop overthinking it and worrying about it😢

im in the process of getting a trainee/graduate position sorted for after graduation. Some firms are really popular and sought after and notoriously difficult to get a position in. I’ve got to the final interview stage at my absolute number 1 choice. I already interviewed online and passed the initial stages (including a group session which wasn’t hosted at the firm itself) and the last stage was an in person interview at the firm and also for them to show you round and meet different people for the day.

I don’t know why I thought it was the done-thing to do, but I brought chocolates for them to say thank you for having me for the afternoon. It was a large box of Belgian chocolates from m&s. I just sort of thought there was a lot of people giving up their time to show me round, chat to me and interview and I just thought it was the sort of thing you did in this situation to say thank you! Sort of like last day of work experience when you bring gifts to thank people for giving up their time

I briefly mentioned it to my friends who were a bit like wtf, why would you do that, and a bit flabbergasted that I thought I should do it. They said I’m going to look like I’m trying to win them over and that it makes me look immature and really unaware for doing it for not realising it’s all just an interview and they’re not showing me round out the good of their heart

I think it just sort of left me that it was all a big giant interview process and I just thought hey, they’re giving up their time to meet me and show me stuff, I’ll get them a little thing to say thank you because that’s what you’re supposed to do?! But I sort of lost sight that them showing me round and all the people meeting me were all just part of the interview process, and now I’ve made myself look like a complete idiot

just so as to not drop feed, I didn’t grow up with parents and had to teach myself a lot of stuff like this, especially social situations and formal work stuff. It’s all completely new to me and I don’t have anyone to go back to and ask for advice unfortunately.

i really wanted this position, and now im worried sick I’ve blown it and made myself look stupid, or that I didn’t appreciate that it was all part of the interview process (which in turn makes me look stupid too). Does anyone work at a firm and could advise me if I’ve made myself look like a complete idiot?

thanks😢

Please don't let the negative comments land OP. It seems the chocolates were kindly received, which actually tells you something about them! I really hope you get the position. Do let us all know how you get on. Best of luck!

Worked for Forest Gump. I would hire you. Thinking outside the box....of chocolates

I think that's just lovely and shows what kind of person you are - thoughtful kind and sweet. I wouldn't read it as a "bribe" and I interview people for a living. It's different from the people who get thier CV printed on cakes or doughnuts and no one blinks an eye at that. Also why shouldn't you stand out a bit and be memorable- it's a dog eat dog world out there and you miss all of the shots you don't take! (Other slogans that go on shit mugs also available ;) )

It's very unusual and definitely shows how green you are but it's not strictly speaking a bad thing. I can see how the panel might think you were trying to 'bribe' them but it's a piece of a larger puzzle. If you came across as sweet, grateful etc then I'd give you the benefit of the doubt. If you seemed entitled and arrogant then I'd assume you were trying to curry favour. Since you say it was a genuine act then I'm sure you'll have come across as just a bit of a clueless newbie trying to be nice, which wouldn't count against you.

I work in a vets. This sort of thing goes down very well in our place. We are annoyed if a rep comes in empty handed. A bit different for an interview I suppose but it would make us think that you were a thoughtful person/team player.

I sent a thank you card to the tutor after my Oxford interview. I didn’t get the place and have always wondered if it was inappropriate or twee of me to do that.

Just chalk it up as a lesson learnt, there is no shame in trying to be nice.

Absolutely nothing to worry about. If they have decided you are the right person for the job, this wouldn’t affect that.
What it has done is given them a (nice) reason to remember you and also gave you an easy ‘in’ to have further conversation on the day with others (cheap student meals etc) which will have demonstrated your personality so it’s all good.

Fingers crossed that you get it. Good luck! 🤞

I think it was a lovely gesture, and shows you as a thoughtful person, ready to acknowledge all co-workers at every level, which makes you a real team player. I love that it sparked a conversation when you handed over the chocs.
you’ll be a great colleague, with your attitude.
good luck - all will be good

Its fine. I'd be thrilled get chocs from a candidate for interview!
Don't overthink it.

Slightly different approach. Years ago I was interviewed in a group. We got showed around in the morning and then interviews in the afternoon. One of the candidates was a friend at Uni.
As we went into an IT suite (it was very early 90’s!) the friend said…
Oh, Petula’s hopeless with computers aren’t you?
So I sort of thought well that’s done, as I wasn’t the best.
We then went to lunch and the friend gave a whole commentary on choosing healthy options. I did not speak a word during that lunch - it was a school and they had school cake.
So I thought sod it. I’ll have two pieces with custard.
The interview was fine and one guy brought up the IT thing and I said listen, I’m not the best, but I’m not an idiot I’ll get stuck in. In fact if you let me take one home over the summer (it was a school!) I’ll have a crack at it.
They asked if I had any questions and I asked if there was any cake left over from lunch as I might as well make the day worth my while.
In teaching they used to tell you at the end of the day if you’d got the job.
I got the job.
The deputy who showed us around said he like the fact that I was pretty calm even when my mate threw me under the bus, and that being willing to learn and having a bit of humour would serve me well.
The friend was furious.
So you learned a lesson maybe not to do it again but you weren’t handing out bags of cash or bottles of champagne. You showed your kind nature and there are worse things in life.
Don’t sweat it and I bet those chocolates got wolfed down!
I got a tray of that cake as well. Downside was I had to spend a summer in my dad’s spare room with an Amstrad computer and its operating manual.

I've never had an interviewee bring me chocolates but I'd be very happy if they did!

I've worked with organisations where hospitality or treats over £7 needed to be declared.

It's not common for the threshold to be so low but it's not entirely alien either.

OP - I know a few people taken on by big firms years ago. They wanted candidates from broad backgrounds, but they also knew that, and had business dress and etiquette lessons as part of the induction. One thing to watch for you might be making gestures that are too large.

My husband does this - will spend 20-30 quid on a friend's child when the convention is to swap gifts worth about a tenner. He doesn't realise that in some circumstances it's awkward and places pressure on others to be too generous - and in business, this can come under corporate hoapitality.

But don't think of it as any different than leaning a new formula in excel.

I got a job once because it was a group interview, and we had to do presentations to the team. One girl really struggled, and another candidate asked a dickhead question to demonstrate how badly she had done, when everyone knew it.

I followed up with a nice question that was easy to handle and allowed her to shine a bit. I wasn't trying to impress, it just seemed like the nice thing to do, and made it a lot less awkward for everyone in the room who was bringing about the mean question.

Ahh I've been interviewing for 25 years and never had this but it's sweet and I wouldn't use it in the decision making process. 💐

Was that really necessary? Who among of us didn’t have some anxiety when trying to enter the world of work for the first time?

OP is a young undergrad (probably only 21 or so) still learning about the world and without any parents to guide her through it.

And from the description of how the gift went down, it sounds like she is genuine, charming and naturally good with people.

Ignore this post OP, you should be proud of yourself.

I bet you struggle in social situations so you have to latch on to a bitch.

Actually I think it was a good idea, it broke the ice, it was sweet, people hire people they like. It may have worked in your favour.

I think the lasagne one is good though! Better than “going to the gym”!

At most corporate jobs you’re not allowed to accept gifts especially related to job interviews etc. if this was the case you would not be at blame the person who accepted the gift would be. You didn’t do anything wrong. Your gesture was very kind. Smaller companies would love this kind of gesture. But at the company I work at if I accepted any kind of gift even a small one I would be reprimanded.

Same. I would think it very odd.

I’m sure I read about a potential Oxford student taking a banana to his interview so that they would remember him! Not sure if he got a place or not!

I think the fact that the boss had banter about it at the end means it’s all ok so try bit to think about it anymore.

He/she probably gave them to the cleaners to share and hasn’t given it a thought since.

I so want you to get the job.

I was showing someone around. They brought buns .... There wasn't a lot but they were from a good brand..

He got the job. Everyone said it was a lovely thing to do... We weren't on the interview panel.

Firstly, do not worry that it will be interpreted as a bribe. I worked in an area where we are very strictly prohibited from entertaining anything that looks like a bribe. An small value item that can be shared with a whole team, like biscuits or chocolates, was not considered a bribe but would be noted as a gift for auditing.

Please also give yourself a break. This is all new to you, and in my experience doing something kind, even if it's inappropriate, won't lead to people thinking badly of you. If you don't get the job, it won't be because of the chocolates, it will just be because the job market is ultra competitive right now.

Best of luck OP, I hope you get it!

If you are hired, there will be the expectation that you'll be bringing in a box of Belgian chocolates in every day. Could be expensive if you find that your salary is going on chocolate. Sugar is very addictive and this is not a good precedent to set.

What if your reporting manager takes you aside and tells you to up your game and bring in Lindt?