AIBU to worry that bringing chocolates to an interview was inappropriate?

[Thebigwideworld]

I think I’ve messed up the biggest opportunity I’ve ever had and cannot stop overthinking it and worrying about it😢

im in the process of getting a trainee/graduate position sorted for after graduation. Some firms are really popular and sought after and notoriously difficult to get a position in. I’ve got to the final interview stage at my absolute number 1 choice. I already interviewed online and passed the initial stages (including a group session which wasn’t hosted at the firm itself) and the last stage was an in person interview at the firm and also for them to show you round and meet different people for the day.

I don’t know why I thought it was the done-thing to do, but I brought chocolates for them to say thank you for having me for the afternoon. It was a large box of Belgian chocolates from m&s. I just sort of thought there was a lot of people giving up their time to show me round, chat to me and interview and I just thought it was the sort of thing you did in this situation to say thank you! Sort of like last day of work experience when you bring gifts to thank people for giving up their time

I briefly mentioned it to my friends who were a bit like wtf, why would you do that, and a bit flabbergasted that I thought I should do it. They said I’m going to look like I’m trying to win them over and that it makes me look immature and really unaware for doing it for not realising it’s all just an interview and they’re not showing me round out the good of their heart

I think it just sort of left me that it was all a big giant interview process and I just thought hey, they’re giving up their time to meet me and show me stuff, I’ll get them a little thing to say thank you because that’s what you’re supposed to do?! But I sort of lost sight that them showing me round and all the people meeting me were all just part of the interview process, and now I’ve made myself look like a complete idiot

just so as to not drop feed, I didn’t grow up with parents and had to teach myself a lot of stuff like this, especially social situations and formal work stuff. It’s all completely new to me and I don’t have anyone to go back to and ask for advice unfortunately.

i really wanted this position, and now im worried sick I’ve blown it and made myself look stupid, or that I didn’t appreciate that it was all part of the interview process (which in turn makes me look stupid too). Does anyone work at a firm and could advise me if I’ve made myself look like a complete idiot?

thanks😢

This sums it up perfectly

Noone is going to think you're trying to bribe someone for a job with a box of chocs!

Don't overthink it. Idk why your friends are so incredulous or why they'd try and shake your confidence after an interview like that.

I think most people would take it at face value tbh. Not everyone is looking to see the worst in each other

You don't seriously think that an employer running a graduate trainee scheme is going to think in a million years that a candidate would be stupid enough to think they'd throw away their recruitment process for a box of chocs do you?

That can't be an actual thing can it?

Oh heavens, don’t give it another thought. If you’re the right fit, a box of chocolates won’t ruin your chances. :)

also, you made it that far, so good for you!

I got to the last round in interviews 6 months ago for my dream job; they flew me out for the final interview and then I didn’t get the job. I was gutted, wondering what I did “wrong,”
then someone retired and they hired me immediately, without any more interviews.

you just never know. You were yourself and you did something thoughtful- nothing wrong with that.

Most people who "show themselves up" do so in a way which shows up some kind of negative trait. You've done it in a way which makes you look like someone people will want to work with.

Good luck with it all! Hope you get it!

I do a lot of interviewing for my company,

TBH, I do think it's inappropriate to bring chocolates to an interview. If an experienced person brought them I'd think it a bit weird that they haven't learnt yet that you don't take gifts, no matter how small, to an interview. However, as it's a graduate position I'd put it down to inexperience and keenness to work for my company, so it wouldn't go against you at all. Don't worry about it, and I hope you've got the job.

Did you grow up in the UK?
I'm asking because I have heard that in other countries, this kind of giving is considered essential.

Those chocolates are delicious.

I think they'll take your youth and good intentions into consideration and offer you the job 🤞

I have a staff member who I managed for a while, and they keep in touch with me to ask how I am and once they gave me a gift from overseas travel. I think it is a nice gesture and thought not much more of it, however it wouldn’t make the point of difference between them and other candidates for a spot in my team.

I think just google a lot of etiquette tips if you are unsure if it is the done thing. I’m similar had no navigation for these sorts of things myself at the start of my career and I didn’t really have google back then to help lol. Sometimes you stumble sometimes not, just chalk it up to experience.

You’ve obviously got a lovely “soft centre’ 😉
Good luck for the position after studying so hard 🎓
Do let us all know 🤞🏽

I think given they were teasing and joking with you about it I think they took it well so wouldn't worry any more about it. I also think whether you've had advice and been brought up with good role models or not getting your first proper job is a learning curve for everyone and employers know that. So don't worry. Honestly I don't think it will make a difference either way - so if you don't get it don't fret about that. You did a kind thing.

Best of luck, OP. You’ve done well getting this far without any help. I would consider the chocolates a sign that you’re a team player who will fit in well, so I hope you get the job xx

Someone gave out individual chocolate medallions at an interview presentation for a corporate role. I can’t remember how he worked it in but it made him memorable and left a good impression. He got the job and was first class in the role.

Not heard of this before but try not to worry. Sounds like you have had to navigate a lot on your own. You are doing great. I wish you luck with the job. 🤗

It’s been a long time since I interviewed but I think it’s a lovely gesture, and shows lovely manners!
I also grew up without any parental guidance, and had to learn everything myself, but you sound lovely and I really wish you well, I’m sure you will go far x

What a nasty thing to say.
OP probably grew up in care, and has had to navigate everything herself.
She is also very young, and just starting out.
Do you feel good about yourself, being so detrimental to someone asking for reassurance?

Hello - you poor thing stressing about this.i spent a long time at a top law firm. Yes it’s a bit unusual and they might have thought “that’s a bit odd” but it wouldn’t impact your chances. They know you are a trainee and will be expecting to grow and shape you so being “immature” is sort of a given. I think it’s very sweet. I wish you luck.

You sounds really lovely and I am rooting for you that you get the job!

I think it’s sweet, they won’t overthink this and it sounds like they reacted well anyway. They’ll obviously know you’re a recent grad so young and inexperienced. If they want you for the job, this won’t put them off. Good luck!

It's definitely not what usually happens in interviews but it was a sweet gesture and I don’t think it will be held against you.
Agree with others that you sound lovely and I hope you get the job!

Meeeeow.

unnecessary. Just why?? Actually don't bother, I don't need to know why you felt the need.

You being your usual charming self...

I once went to the job centre to sort out my CV. I brought the lady a marsbar as a pay it forward kind gesture, she told me very bluntly she couldn't accept gifts as they would be seen as bribes.
She was only doing my CV? I will keep my own mars bar then.
If they didn't like you then you wouldn't of got to the final bit. It's too see if you fit in with them all.

I think that was really thoughtful of you OP and will make you stand out from the crowd.
I hope that they pick you. Best of luck 🤞