AIBU to stop covering my job-share partner's time off?

[JobShareDrama]

I job share with a woman at work. We both work 2 days each. I’ve covered for her a few times when she had child care issues during school holidays, but never had her cover for me yet.

I asked her in Jan to cover my 2 week holiday in July and she agreed. A few days ago she sent me a list of all the days and weeks she needs me to cover. I agreed to them, even though it’s not convenient for me, as she’s covering for me.

I agreed to them all, and on doing so she immediately sent me a return message saying she can no longer cover my holiday, leaving me in the lurch.

So, I’ve covered for her multiple times, and she’s not once returned the favour.

I feel like saying I’m not doing her dates then, but then this will pretty much ring the death bell on a cordial working relationship. TBH I’m sick of being a peacekeeper and mug to people.

AIBU to from henceforth just say I’m not free to cover her days off?

Just tell her that the set up works both ways so if she won’t cover yours, you won’t cover hers. That way the ball is in her court and any future animosity it causes is on her. She’s a sneaky CF getting away with what she can and you can’t let her.

She also has a very sweet deal. But from what I understand sweeter than yours. I assume cover is required to gain extra holiday? If I was you I’d stop doing it and I’d give it a few months and cancel some you’ve agreed to especially the one which causes the most inconvenience

How is she leaving you in the lurch?

Do you own in the company?

If not, I don't see how it's your problem when it comes to who covers your annual leave?

Where are management in all this nonsense?

is it a job share where you’re both doing the same job, or one where you’re both doing different aspects of what would otherwise be one post?

I line manage job-sharing people of both kinds and all we do is sometimes adjust people’s priorities so that the crucial stuff is still done when someone’s on leave. We don’t get them to actually cover each other’s time off.

Yes, there are two women who job share at my work and they do exactly this.

However, if one cannot cover the others annual leave, it's really not their problem.

You can be adult and professional but that shouldn't mean stressing out over something that a manager is paid to sort.

Does that mean you’ll have to cancel your holiday? I’m assuming not as you’re entitled to holidays. I’d be having a word with your line manager to say how flexible you’ve been with her needs and she can’t even cover your annual holiday.
i hope you get paid for these extra days otherwise I’d say no

this. I have been in three job shares and while we took on the whole of the job during each other's leave in terms of management responsibility, we never had to work extra time to cover.

I work a job share, we don't cover each others days if we're on leave. If one of us is off sick (or our kids are sick) and we've got something urgent, the other would step in if they can, but if they can't it's up to our line manager to sort. That's why my manager gets paid more than me!

We do make sure we don't have book the same week off as leave as we're the co-managers but that's just good practice.

I agreed to them all, and on doing so she immediately sent me a return message saying she can no longer cover my holiday, leaving me in the lurch.
So, I’ve covered for her multiple times, and she’s not once returned the favour.
I feel like saying I’m not doing her dates then, but then this will pretty much ring the death bell on a cordial working relationship. TBH I’m sick of being a peacekeeper and mug to people.

Just send a polite message that you are unable to cover the holiday dates she provided, and stop doing it. If she asks why, just say personal reasons.

Do the same to her, give it a few days and then tell her, using the exact same wording she used, that you’re no longer able to cover her time off.

you don’t have a cordial working relationship and you don’t have to make excuses for why you cannot cover her leave.

simply say: “I have previously covered for you on the basis we had what I believed was a reciprocal arrangement. If you cannot cover for me I am no longer willing to inconvenience myself for you”.

Your workshare colleague cerainly does not care about keeping a cordial work atmosphere so why should you. Just tell her something came up and you cant cover for her

I’d have to go back to her and ask why she waited for you to agree her dates then back out of cover previously agreed for you @JobShareDrama and point out how many times you have covered for her with no reciprocation.

I would possibly then discuss privately with my Manager.

flexible work arrangements such as job-share require people to be professional and have an attitude of ‘give and take’. Hers seems to be ‘take’.

Sure, but it's a bit silly to rely on informal arrangements like this when you're planning holidays abroad, no matter how "adult and professional" both people are.

I disagree.

You can respond, I agreed to cover for you as I have in the past, even though some of the dates are very inconvenient for me on the basis that we would help each other out.

I did this because you promised to cover for my holiday dates but have now backed out, leaving me in the lurch. So it doesn't feel like a reciprocal or fair arrangement to me.

Perhaps we should both find a different way of organising this.

( also op... you are allowed holiday days.. Can't your manager organise this.. so you don't have the awkwardness landed on you? )

Your manager should be handling this.

Something like this, I think, but maybe a bit clearer re the “I’m not covering your dates” part.

So after the first bit I’d say “I agree to the dates you’ve requested on the basis you were covering my July x-y holiday. As that’s not the case, I don’t think this mutual cover system is working, so please make alternative arrangements for your periods of leave”

OP clarity needed - do you get paid for the extra days you do? Does she take it as unpaid leave or is this her annual leave and you are sorting it out amongst yourselves for your boss?

Not a problem really, you push to back to you boss. “Hi boss, just a reminder I have x to y days booked off over the summer. I’ve just checked with job share and she can’t cover those. Thought I better let you know. Also she’s asked me to cover this list of days. I can do all of them, but obviously will be putting in a big overtime bill for the summer and wanted to let you know to budget for it.”

Agree.

This is the employer's problem

Unless the employer has asked the OP and her colleague to sort this out between themselves.

But if that's the case the OP needs to go back to the employer and ask them to come up with a solution as the OP and colleague can't agree

Why not? The other woman agreed to cover OP's days then went back on her word. This means OP can do exactly the same thing - and, I absolutely would do that, in her shoes.

WHAT cordial relationship? She's a CF and its time to call her out.

But she agreed to cover her two weeks holiday. What's the difference?

You're a mug if you let her get away with this. Just say, I've reviewed the situation and I'm afraid I am no longer able to cover your holiday dates.

You haven't fucked up the working relationship as you haven't got one - she's just taking the piss.

Well she can wait to the last minute and withdraw… seems acceptable