AIBU to ask where the line is with swearing?

[TheBusyMoose]

I have just been reading another thread and the consensus seems to be that saying "go get the fucking cup" is likely to be frustration/tiredness etc and while not ok not that big of a deal. But I have read others where "fucking idiot", "fuck off"
or "for fucks sake" are ltb territory. What's the difference? Where is the line? Is it when is directed at someone? Does it depend on how much they swear normally and how normalised it is for you? Is swearing around children never ok ... but we may slip up from time to time and shouldn't beat ourselves up about it?

I guess maybe it comes down to argument and communication styles.

I love an affectionate cunt - dh and I met in Glasgow, cunt has a special place in our hearts!

Is swearing at children a hard line for most? Or is that still a grey area for some?

The sentence cunt has a special place in our heart made me giggle 😊

That would be child abuse.

If someone speaks to you like they hate you, believe them and proceed accordingly.

Yes, definite boundaries where the In-laws are concerned and I rarely swore in front of my Mum. Even though she very occasionally said 'fuck' 😂

I think my DH would cross a line if he called me a 'fucking bitch'. We jokingly call each other a 'massive twat' or 'massive bellend' and stuff like that.

But I think I would feel upset if he called me a 'fucking bitch' during an argument and in that kind of way. I honestly don't think he ever would though.

If my Dad swore at my mother - that was very bad (they hated each other but stayed married) - dh and I swear at each other all the time, we have a brilliant 25 year relationship.

😂

My DH and I will sometimes say, affectionately, 'I love you, you daft cunt' 😂If one of us has done something stupid to make the other laugh.

Okay so if it you don't like it and you tell them outside of argument will/should they apologise? Or is simply saying you "know it's not real" fair? Does it matter if they then do it again?

Ha I know daft cunts, great cunts and fucking cunts.

Emotional? From my understanding of family courts swearing at children rarely meets any thresholds unfortunately

What do you need to do to be classed as a great cunt?

I swear in frustration more than I should, but mainly at or about myself. My DC have tuned it out, though we have had conversations around swearing appropriately and not doing it to hurt or degrade people.
I did tell a work colleague ‘fuck off and stop being a twat’ once at a pinnacle of a subversive campaign of ‘mild’ bullying directed towards me. I did apologise about an hour later for my choice of words, but that the sentiment stood. He hasn’t behaved that way directly towards me since. He is still a knob though, doesn’t behave himself and is on about his fifth final warning for behaviour.

Absolute no to swearing in front of children apart from my DS once he got to teens.

I've never sworn at work unless i'm in a 1:1 conversation with someone I know very well and our conversation isn't overheard.

DH and I swear all the time as part of general conversation at home mainly if we are laughing about something but also in frustration at a situation. Never directed in anger at each other.

I never swear in front of my Dad as I know he absolutely hates it (I am in my 50s). My Mum is very relaxed about it as is my sister. She and I swear in conversation together very much like me and DH do.

I don't like hearing swearing in public that is loud, eg someone shouting.

I have definitely sworn in my MN posts but I wouldn't swear at someone.

I feel the swearing is a bit of a red herring here. Someone can say awful things and not swear at all. So if I had had an argument with someone I would be less focused on swear words and more the general message and intent. Eg. 'Why are you so useless? You don't seem capable of anything. I'm so done'. You could throw in some swear words in there for good measure. But actually, at a fundamental level, it makes no difference. I wouldn't expect an apology for swear words specifically but rather what they have said. And if someone was speaking to me like this on the regular, I'd be gone. I don't really understand people who have relationships where they argue all the time. Why?? Surely its just shit?!

Abhor the C word, with a passion. I judge those who use it. 🤑

It doesn't have to be all the time though, if you've been together 35 years you're going to have had multiple arguments and maybe question how these difficult conversations go

In my weekly team meeting, we have a ‘cunt of the week’ item. My idea - I’m a very senior manager 😂

Classy

lol

Be a generally nice person.

Low bar. Sounds perfect 🤩

Don’t come to Glasgow…

We don't swear at all as a rule. I will say the odd 'bloody' but that's about it. I know other people swear but I don't like it.

19 years. Honestly don't argue. Disagree sometimes, but doesn't turn into an argument. Dh has honestly never said anything derogatory, disrespectful or awful at all to me. But we swear all the time.

Once he was on the phone to some kind of service provider sounding more and more pissed off. Got put on hold and moaned about how rude they were being. I said 'well you sound like you are being pretty rude too' and he snapped back - 'don't you fucking start too! You can't hear what they are saying to me! And that is honestly the worst thing he's ever said to me. I wasn't even pissed off, I just thought 'I've never seen him this cross'. He apologised to me as soon as he got off the call.