AIBU to worry my 15-year-old son will stay short?

[Peonytimeguys]

I know it matters to him. He will say something (about how the girls tell him
height is the most important thing for them!) and then clam up but he internalises it, I know- he keeps expecting another growth spurt but who can say that will happen.

i know all the right things to say and I say them. I reflect on how it doesn’t matter, that it’s important build a life on better, less shallow values than how we look. Equally (yes I know therein lies contradictions) I tell him how gorgeous (he is, genuinely) looking, smart, funny and a good person he is. And kids are cruel and school is brutal yada yada

But inside I do think the world is brutal, harsh re what women go for (even the dating apps have height filters) and as much as I try to reject the nonsense, my heart hurts that he will be judged and rejected in love etc - even though I fully realise there are many reasons we get judged, height is just one of them!

He is 15.5yrs, 5ft 6. He shot up about 6 inches in a year - was always on the v short side now less so. Late developer? No facial or underarm hair. Dad is 5ft 8, im 5ft 3. His feet aren’t big

What’s his diet like? Is he an omnivore? Whilst genetics are the main driver of height, a good balanced diet can potentially give the body the sufficient building blocks to grow. Research it yourself but plenty of good protein, calcium, zinc, nutrients to utilise the diet to affectively absorb
if you have the money you could look into HGH through private route, but this also may be highly regulated, I know it is really expensive
FWIW I’ve just had to trade in my nice nippy BMW for a more boring Volvo because my teens are so blooming tall!

Height on its own isn't a reason for the GP but if there's a more general suspicion of delayed puberty then this is. It's more common in boys than in girls. The response would be watchful waiting at this point but it would be monitored.

First DS 5 7, Second DS 5 10. Parents 5'7 and 5'3

First feels shorter than most at 5'7. Has always been shorter. Always had a healthy, varied diet. However a serious health condition/s and medications have probably hindered potential, weight fell dangerously low to 5 stones at age 15 when he should have been growing the most. However even before he was ill, has always been conscious of his height as his friends have always been taller and discussed height a lot. His current friends are 6 ft +, three are 6' 5+.

Second said he feels tall at 5'10. His friends range from 5'3 to 6 ft' so he is one of the taller ones but he said he thinks he would be fine being shorter as he feels confident in his appearance. None of his friends mention height so it's never been an issue for him, and hopefully, not an issue for his shorter friends either.

Firstly, he's not a man. He's a 15-year-old boy. Very few boys cease to grow at 15.

Secondly, yes, 5'6" is on the shorter side for a man, but it's not abnormally short, at all. It's well within the normal range. Loads of men are that height.

Not necessarily true. I’m 5ft 4in, DH is 5ft 6in and our son is 6ft 4in!

It's natural to worry about our DC's happiness bit it's very likely you son hasn't finished growing. Shorter kids do tend to develop later (I was a tall girl with the opposite problem).

My brother shot up 6 inches in a year when he was 14 and then stopped growing for a couple of years. He grew another 3 inches, slowly, in his late teens.

I have never understood any issue with being short. I have a thing for short men - I’m 5 ft 8 and some of my best looking, hottest boyfriends were shorter than me. They also liked me slightly towering over them in heels.

It’s just not an issue! I don’t see being tall as better.

DS is 5ft 6 at almost 18, which is just a fraction taller than me. His projection in red book was about 5ft 7, so maybe he’ll squeeze out that final inch over the next year. His height does bother him a bit, but he is resigned to it now, and will make the odd joke about it. I probably worry about it more (secretly, I don’t mention it to him), because he was on a year group filled with tall boys, and beat myself up a bit about whether we fed him properly (which is stupid, he had a healthy diet, but ate like a sparrow till he was around 16) every time I come across a reference to nutrition and height, but I know I am being ridiculous. Plenty of successful happy fulfilled men who are shorter than average height. But tbh, your DS has a few years of growth to go OP.

The male femural growth plates don’t ossify until 21. Many boys are late developers. I have one like yours, too and feel your pain 💐

My son got testosterone injections to kick start his puberty as he was very late bloomer. 30cm shorter than most of his class at age 14. So it might be worth testing testosterone levels. He was seen by an endocrinologist. He might have started on his own anyway but it helped him immensely from an psychological point of view. We went private.

Did you use private healthcare or can you recommend a clinic with direct access? 🙏

My DH was 5ft6 until 17, then in 18 months grew to 6ft2! Has the stretch marks to prove it!

Good point!

Please note @Peonytimeguys I was not suggesting reversing time and overfeeding your son so he might grown a bit taller. 😃

Poor lad, teenage years are tough enough with something you can control causing you upset.

My son was the same at his age and I can remember having this same worry seeing all his friends who were so much taller than him. He's 21 now and nearly 6 foot. Please try not to worry!

And yet they’re not wrong. Milk contains calcium and vitamin D both needed to build and grow the skeleton. Hence why being deficient in either leads to stunting.

Go to doc to get him checked.

In the corporate world, many, many of the most successful executives are short. They compensate. They tend to have lovely wives. Once people get older they look beyond height, but very tough at this age.

Im 5" 6 dh 5"7 ,ds is 6" 1 .massive growth spurt when he turned 17-18 .Surprised us all .

My adult sons are short at around 5ft6/7. I'm sure they would like to have been taller but genetics being what they are, that was unlikely to ever be the case. I'd quite fancy being average height myself, but que sera sera.
It's quite likely that your son still has some growing to do @Peonytimeguys but given parental heights it is unlikely he is ever going to be tall.To be honest I'd say it is some disadvantage. For example, my DS is a pretty good sportsman but his physique has without doubt influenced his progress. He was on his sport's talent programme and the coaches were up front that ultimately he wasn't tall enough for his position. And yes, they have both been teased about their height and it probably has reduced the dating pool. But I think it's one of those situations where it is not worth dwelling on things you can't change. Better to focus on developing positive attributes rather than dwell on physical things that can't be changed.
5ft6 is at the shorter end of the normal range it is true, but it is normal, particularly in the context of parental heights. If you were both six footers and had a short mid teenage son then it would be of more concern of course. But I wouldn't think that given that neither you nor his Dad are tall his height alone would be a red flag for any kind of medical condition. However, it does sound like puberty may be delayed. I think it probably would be worth seeking medical advice about that.

My sister had 3 sons, she was 5ft 1 and her husband was 5ft 5, they had a son that grew to 5ft 6 and 2 sons that were over 6ft. The two tall ones got the height gene from their great grandfather. it is a lottery.

Thanks everyone. There is absolutely no point in taking him to the doctor to get checked. He is developing puberty wise - he's just perhaps not finished whereas others have. He's not awfully short; he's probably constitutionally smaller. There is no point to any tests etc - and I am someone who has researched this at length. If I felt it could help, I'd do it. If he was as short as he was 18 months ago, I'd be all over it.

So, please no more doctor or medical intervention suggestions. It's simply not needed.

In the real world short men don’t have any particular difficulty finding partners - we have several in our social circle and they’re all happily married. Your son is still likely several years away from his growth plates fusing, so chances are he’ll end up a few inches taller than he is now. But either way, he’s already grown past the height at which he’d stand out as being unusually short.

If he's already 5'6" and doesn't have facial hair I think reminding him it's a waiting game is key. There were some guys who even grew a couple more inches while they were at uni amongst my friends, and there were plenty still shooting up from 15-18. I can understand the anxiety but I think you just have to shelve it.