New neighbour has asked us to stop construction on new home until daughter has finished exams.

[Grammarninja]

This is such a tricky one for me. We bought a house that needed a complete overhaul a year ago. We've finally gotten through architects, planning permission and trying to find affordable builders etc. It has been stressful.
We broke ground this week and the neighbours have asked us to stop until dd has finished her exams in 3 weeks.
I really feel for the family and can't imagine how upsetting it must be for them at this crucial time (we had no idea they had a child sitting exams this summer). My husband has offered them an office at his work around the corner to facilitate study. I wouldn't mind postponing if it wouldn't cost us 30k to do so as builders are working to a set time frame. I wouldn't even mind the extra costs we'd incur through having to stay in our current accommodation for another month if it weren't for the builders' costs which we simply can't afford.
I'm worried now that we're going to start off on a terrible note with our new neighbours which would be such a shame considering my current neighbours are like family.
Are we being unreasonable to continue with the build in these circumstances?

I can kinda see their point and they are not unreasonable to ask.

But equally you are not unreasonable to refuse.

I would be very clear with them that had they spoken to you earlier then you would absolutely have tried to accommodate but unfortunately at this point it will cost 30k to postpone.

The fact your dh has offered them space in his office is amazing and that should be more than enough.

Just maybe sweeten it with a promise to not complain when she wants a noisy party to celebrate the end of exams! 😉

Yes she does. Some posters clearly don't given their responses.

you’d be an absolute mug if you agree to their demands.
it’s really unfortunate timing but not a chance I’d postpone.

You were not to know and of course you have to go ahead. I’d explain about the £30k and I’d get the daughter a voucher for nails or pedicure something relaxing for after her exams and a bottle to the parents maybe. Just a kind gesture. Yes you’ve got the right to do the work and don’t want to lose the £30k but understand noise like that does anyone’s head in let alone during a stressful period of time like exams. A kind gesture is a nod to the inconvenience and you may have a future babysitter next door if you play your cards right! All ages of kids are tricky, toddlers, teenagers… I think it’s a shame we live so insular these days. They’d be a time when we’d know exactly what our neighbours had on and building that rapport is priceless. Although I’ve seen my fair share of cob head neighbours too in my time, the ones where we have each others backs and are just aware of the little things is gold dust.

Why didn't you just buy somewhere that was in move in condition then?

Apologise. Explain you can’t change it unfortunately because it would cost you thousands. You’ll ensure building is during the approved hours of 8-6 so their daughter can sleep well on a night. There’s school and libraries for studying or ear buds.

This

Daytime she can go to the library or the office space kindly offered by your dh

evenings builders won’t be there

Presumably a house in move in condition would cost more?

I think you should crack on with the work. But I think you need to accept that your relationship with these new neighbours will not be like your relationship with your current neighbours.

It is really irritating when you are stuck next to building work and the people having it done aren’t even living there being impacted by it at all, but you are.

The entitlement, absolutely not, their little darling will just need to cope with life, I’ll assume work stops at 6pm ish, she has all evening and your DHs offer is very generous.

Lovely 🙄
There IS such a thing as compromise, and I think it would be a nice gesture on the OP’s part to buy the headphones.

They can go to the library or a friends house then! Entitled Arsehole’s

This is such an unreasonable conclusion that I can only laugh at it. 🤣😂🙄

Do you think going to their house with noise-cancelling earphones will go down well? I'd worry it would appear I'm making light of their predicament. 😬

We are in a similar boat. 3 different sets of various level of building work going on next door, behind and across the road. I haven’t asked anyone to stop but it’s driving my exam child mad. They’ve been using the school library a lot but it’s not ideal for anyone.

OP just explain that you have looked into it but the cost element is too much to do anything about. I would understand. And be grateful that you had looked into it even if nothing can be done.
But I also can see why they have asked… just in case it could have been postponed. Which it can’t.

We had twatty ndn's building work for a year. 7 days a week. 8am til 10pm every day. Not a single apology or acknowledgement they were cunts. . Dh told the bloke not to ever bother trying to speak to us.
If they had offered up rigid times of work and a headset things could have been so different...

This is a horrible situation for all involved but they surely can’t expect you to lose 30k! Your husband has offered office space which is a lovely gesture, the other thing would be to make sure that you stick to the guidelines for the times work starts and finishes. Failing that suggest they cover the 30k to postpone the work! I’m guessing they won’t be too keen on the idea!!

Do you understand anything about the economics of house buying? 😂

Not a lot you can do about it, but a kind offer from your dh. I would apologise and explain it would cost thousands to change the timing. I do feel for their dd though, maybe you could offer to buy headphones as someone said earlier. Not that you should have to but at least you’ve done everything you could for neighbourly harmony

Get real

Pp's suggestion of buying noise cancelling head phones is a good one. Maybe offer the daughter a little wodge of cash so she can study in coffee shops or something like that?

oh how awful. I feel so sorry for them and their daughter. If it is A levels or GCSEs , the poor girl will be completely distressed and desperate. This could ruin her whole future. I’m not saying you should lose £30k but don’t minimise what is happening here. It’s really bad. Make sure the builders do whatever they can to keep the noise down including not playing music etc while she’s trying to revise or rest. Poor girl. The office space is a good option.

It’s unfortunate timing but I certainly wouldn’t delay construction even with the extra housing costs alone never mind the 30k. Building works can so easily run into costly issues along the way!

Every school or college is different but our DC are allowed to use the school library or a spare classroom to study independently or in small groups.
Your DH offering office space is very kind but there are also libraries, coffee shops, friends and family etc.

Are you the neighbour ?