New neighbour has asked us to stop construction on new home until daughter has finished exams.

[Grammarninja]

This is such a tricky one for me. We bought a house that needed a complete overhaul a year ago. We've finally gotten through architects, planning permission and trying to find affordable builders etc. It has been stressful.
We broke ground this week and the neighbours have asked us to stop until dd has finished her exams in 3 weeks.
I really feel for the family and can't imagine how upsetting it must be for them at this crucial time (we had no idea they had a child sitting exams this summer). My husband has offered them an office at his work around the corner to facilitate study. I wouldn't mind postponing if it wouldn't cost us 30k to do so as builders are working to a set time frame. I wouldn't even mind the extra costs we'd incur through having to stay in our current accommodation for another month if it weren't for the builders' costs which we simply can't afford.
I'm worried now that we're going to start off on a terrible note with our new neighbours which would be such a shame considering my current neighbours are like family.
Are we being unreasonable to continue with the build in these circumstances?

But the OP hasn’t said she wants to make the daughter’s life harder, as the post you quoted asserts? Of course she doesn’t want to. She didn’t know they had a daughter taking exams.

Teens have earphones on most of the time and ours couldve slept through ww3.

Do not accommodate their silly requests for delays. Smile, wave and don't engage.

My DS (in middle of GCSEs) is working at the library until 7pm. I assume you have to stop by 7pm anyway. I’d buy her some expensive noise cancelling headphones over the ear ones.

Completely agree! And find a bunch of builders who stick around after 4pm......... Or come at the weekend?

My parents renovated our house during my a levels and if I needed quiet during the day I stayed at school. Most of the time by the time I had got home from school had a snack and started revision the builders were close to being done for the day.

Tell your neighbours you'll pause the building if they can write you a cheque for the £30k this will cost you.

How will this young woman manage to study when she eventually heads off to university?

They're being far too precious.

I would worry about the karma and someone will do the same to you when your 2 year old has her public exams!

You mean her parents can provide those not the op, surely?

It would cost you a lot less than 30k to rent them a house for 3 weeks, you've been able to afford to make sure your family is spared the noise. Or you stay in their house and put them in your rental? My child is currently trying to meet a 3A* and 1A Cambridge offer after years slogging with profound adhd and I would want to kill you if this was happening to me. That family will be going out of their minds over this.The kid can't just lug the contents of their desk back and forth every day. Mine has stuff all over the walls, formulae etc. Do something about this. Now.

Dd is currently doing a levels and choosing to go to the school library for most revision but for GCSEs she was very much at home and I would have been gutted for her if she’d had this kind of disruption back then. I don’t think I would have asked neighbours to stop but I might have asked for set times so we knew what to expect.

As someone living next to this currently I’m so glad my teens are not doing exams right now. The noise thunders through the whole house you just cannot escape it and the vibrations.

If they are on study leave they might not actually be able to go back into school to study. One of mines school doesn’t allow it your expected to study at home where is supposed to be quieter than the hustle and bustle school.

Horrible for both but yeah you’re probably not going to be friends.

YANBU. However, I can see why it’s annoying for them that it’s been a year with nothing and then suddenly started work right in the middle of her exams. The timing is awful (but not anyone’s fault). Sadly I think the fact they have asked you to postpone the work mean they think it’s a reasonable request and are probably going to be very annoyed when you say no. The offer of an office space is very kind and I’d be trying to explain how much it would cost to delay and apologise profusely too to try and keep friendly relations if possible. But ultimately keep doing the work.

My son is in the middle of his GCSEs and he’s on study leave, which means once he has finished his exam for the day he comes home to study. Tomorrow he finishes at 10:50am, home 11ish.

What exams are happening in the next 3 weeks?

Posted too soon - I mean perhaps there might be some leeway in this - a small negotiation, such as if there is the day before a particular exam. But appreciate that might not scale.

Maybe they will. Sadly we cannot control neighbour's home improvements. Different if the op was having parties all the time but builders and tradesmen tend to have very narrow windows of availability.

Of course you’re not being unreasonable. You’re talking about planned, necessary construction work, not just noise from someone who wants to play their music a bit too loud. They need to just suck it up, and in fact they’ve got some nerve even asking.

Ask my neighbour! 7:30am - 6pm. Weekends? What’s a weekend. They just start later at 8am 😬😬😱

Yeah, I remember trying to revise through all sorts of noise when I was in halls!

Thank you. Over the last year we've had several requests from these neighbours. We've had to hire people to deal with our joining hedge, pay for a new fence and told that we'd have to consult them on our access lane as the current cover has been providing them with cover and they don't want to lose this as their bikes might rust so 'we'll have to agree on your plans for sheltering this space'.

YANBU OP, they are the ones expecting the world to halt for them. Do you think it might be a bit of jealousy, and they’re using their DD as an excuse?

It’s ok…she can use her dad’s office space.

Your access lane and they want you to keep cover for their bikes? Wow, they’re incredibly entitled!

I do not think you could pause construction entirely, but you could be really clear that construction will strictly not start before 9.00am and will finish at 5.00 at least over the exam period. You have offered a quiet space and you you could consider if there is anything else you could do to make the exams smoother. Difficult one.

I also wouldn’t be sending my 15/16 year old daughter to some random man’s work office either.

You obviously can’t stop and incur £30k. You’ve offered them an office and their child can go study in the library or at school. You’ve been more than reasonable.