New neighbour has asked us to stop construction on new home until daughter has finished exams.

[Grammarninja]

This is such a tricky one for me. We bought a house that needed a complete overhaul a year ago. We've finally gotten through architects, planning permission and trying to find affordable builders etc. It has been stressful.
We broke ground this week and the neighbours have asked us to stop until dd has finished her exams in 3 weeks.
I really feel for the family and can't imagine how upsetting it must be for them at this crucial time (we had no idea they had a child sitting exams this summer). My husband has offered them an office at his work around the corner to facilitate study. I wouldn't mind postponing if it wouldn't cost us 30k to do so as builders are working to a set time frame. I wouldn't even mind the extra costs we'd incur through having to stay in our current accommodation for another month if it weren't for the builders' costs which we simply can't afford.
I'm worried now that we're going to start off on a terrible note with our new neighbours which would be such a shame considering my current neighbours are like family.
Are we being unreasonable to continue with the build in these circumstances?

Excellent idea 👍

I did read it. I have been waiting on planning permission myself in the past etc. I'd love to hear what the new neighbours story is.

For someone doing exams, this is an awful imposition. All these alternative suggestions sound only great to someone who hasn't studied and done exams recently. I have been in a similar situation in the past. It was awful.

👍

Having done / extensions I understand your predicament. I’d arrange a meeting between the builder, you and the parent/child. Not all the work will be noisy and they could give advance warning of days when it will be noisy so she can go elsewhere.

Well she can stay in the house and study with all the noise then.The only available options involve the work going ahead so she’ll have to just cope.

Are they going to ask everyone in the entire neighbourhood not to mow their lawns, pressure-wash their cars/patios, socialise in or allow their small kids to play in their gardens for the next three weeks?

I wouldn’t be sending my child to a random unknown unfamiliar building, ludicrous suggestion! That is in no way a compromise.

They need to ask builders to provide a plan of when the most disruptive work is going to occur so the family can work around this.

Are you the neighbour? I'm sure she could go to a friend and they could study together if necessary, most kids do that now anyway. Life goes on, Council street works and other things happen and they are not going to delay because you want to. Usually better to adapt to life early and learn to live with it. Otherwise some quality earplugs would help.

This is a nonsense. Those two things are not mutually exclusive.

They’re in Ireland

Can’t be arsed with this any more. You’re just here for an argument.

It’s 500m away from her home. There’s a kitchen and a coffee shop downstairs. Of course it’s a compromise, and a good one.

Does nobody read OPs posts
They have to do demolition first

how can that be quiet with the huge expense of taking something down brick by brick as the only alternative

Exactly this. It’s batshit. And it’s only on MN. IRL if your neighbour asked you to delay expensive building plans because of their child’s exams you wouldn’t give it headspace. They had the plans, they knew what was happening. Why did they leave it until the last minute to ask this ?

I can promise you that this thread is 100% real. What we are doing to the house is basically as expensive as building it anew. It will also involve an attic conversion. The quotes for the steel alone are eye-watering. We've been through a serious amount of stress trying to get this build off the ground.
Having told the architect we had a budget of 450k, he planned a build that when it went to tender, all 3 quotes were for 750k+
He blamed the quantity surveyor and said it wasn't really his problem.
My husband then found foreign builders to do the job for much less. Architect said he wouldn't stand over the build if we used them as he didn't know them.
Then builders said they wouldn't build without an architect and that's when it got very stressful and upsetting.
Thankfully, at the last minute we found a different architect to take it on.
We've had to beg and borrow to find the 100k and we're pretty screwed if they need even a penny more.

Try and work around this op. The young person only gets this opportunity once in her lifetime.

I think some of the replies are ridiculous OP. Yes the timing is unfortunate but the world doesn’t stop because kids have exams. Do they not have family nearby where a desk could or is already set up that could be utilised? They could use this during the day to study and still be in a familiar environment. I revised at home with 3 noisy siblings fighting arguing and playing etc and managed just fine.

I think people need to toughen up a little bit and think outside the box to find solutions to problems themselves instead of expecting the world to change for them. Had I known this wasnt the done thing I’d have knocked on my neighbours door last week and asked them to holt their building work so I can have a lay in on my week off and enjoy the sun in my garden without all the noise.

Your neighbours sound a bit precious tbh. Asking you to pay for the fence/sort the bushes out/keep the cover over your lane so their bikes don’t get rusty.. I don’t think you’ll ever be good friends with them unless you bend to their every whim, so I wouldn’t worry. Shit happens, as they say 🤷🏻‍♀️

Sorry YABU
you have been there a whole 12 months and faffed about, this should have been imo part of a sense of consideration when looking for builders to avoid a measly couple of weeks. Of course she won’t want to trapse down to a Library or a strange office complex when she needs up to 5 years of books, paperwork, folders, possibly large documents to go through.

Yes £30k is a lot of money, but this should never have even been getting to this point.

It’s your prerogative to go ahead and do as you please, but be prepared to lose any friendship or consideration in the future.

How people hate children. I never get this.

This 👏🏻

Er, no, she can resit. Where is the workaround ?

Many people here haven’t really factored in what actual work will be taking place and whether it’s even that noisy! We’ve literally just had an extension built and the noise really wasn’t horrific for long periods of time. Brick laying isn’t disruptive, the mixer wasn’t on constantly and it was round the front of the house, the drilling for joining new wall in wasn’t for a long time after actual building work started. However our neighbours extended last year and it wasn’t brick its timber and that was incredibly noisy for long periods of time. So it really depends what’s actually happening for the very limited time left of exams. That being said you can’t just stop building

An awful lot of bonkers replies. They will be working in office hours presumably, and if the kid needs to work in the school library they can. Noise happens in life. They are being wildly unreasonable, and you don’t need to twist yourself around making them feel better about their unreasonable request.