What is the wankiest thing you’ve seen your ex do?

[Magpiesinthegarden]

That made you think - what a knob! And that you are well rid of them!

lighthearted thread -

I’ll go first -

Recently my ex changed his profile picture to this wanky AI generated image of him in the middle with a halo and two angels either side… he actually gave himself a halo 🤣 What a knobhead! Like he was Jesus 😳(He was a massive narcissist. My ex. Not Jesus)

What are the wankiest things your ex has ever done?

Used a redundancy payout to travel to Turkey for a hair transplant, new teeth and started getting Botox. He’s massively in debt, so I would have thought it would be better spent elsewhere. He then went on to travel around Asia to all of the places that you’d target as a sex tourist (think Pattaya etc). Thinking about him, makes my vagina shrivel.

Your Dad is brilliant! I reckon he secretly knew what he was doing which makes it even more delicious

This must win! 😬

Surely not Jenny from the block 🤣🤣

My ex finds shitty excuses to get out of our daughter going over to his when he can't be arsed to look after her. It ranges from his girlfriend is older(he's 35 she's almost 60) and his latest this week is that he can't have her cos I'm apparently taking her to the fair this weekend- I told him no I'm not cos I'm working this weekend

I bet it was more likely to be Blunder Woman aka Bella Emberg...😆😂

My ex and children’s dad will sit in a hotel room and have the cleaners clean around him 🤢

When my ex and I were dating a long long time ago we spent time at a Scottish landmark and he always used to say that a photo of us there looking loved up was his favourite and reminded him of one of the best days of his life.
A few years later when he was seeing someone else, after treating me horribly, he shared a pic of him and his new girlfriend at the same landmark in the exact same spot in almost the exact same pose. I remember thinking you poor girl what have you let yourself in for?

Marry someone else and they split up with him pretty much after same amount of time for similar issues.... Wanky... cos... Like learn from your mistakes??!!! And many more examples...

That’s a reason to stop his contact!

Haha that’s hilarious what a bell end!

I had a new boyfriend lovebomb me a bit, whisking me away every weekend to places of his choice, sometimes long drives after a hectic week I really didn't want but he framed as romantic, buying me jewelry and clothes that weren't my style etc. and insisting I wear them, which I did to be polite. He was very keen and very generous but it was too much and I ended it after a few months. We hadn't added each on social media - felt a bit teenage - but I snooped after we'd split and sure enough, he was styling me like his ex and taking me to places they had gone, down to the same tables at the same cafes in obscure UK towns. I don't know if he was trying to recreate her or 'overwrite' their memories but whatever, I'm glad I escaped before he gifted me hair dye and plastic surgery!

When my ex husband moved out, he took loads of petty stuff but the best one was the cutlery divider. Left all the loose cutlery in the drawer but just specifically swiped the divider. I nearly wet myself laughing when I opened the drawer.

Steal my medication (I’m chronically ill) then run home to his mummy plus ignore my son when he called him- During my son’s a level exams too! What Cnut!

Quit his job and move 6 hours away when we split up.
Tell our children I had made him homeless, making them so worried about him they begged me to let him move in with us.
Tell the children he couldn't see them because he was giving me all his money ( he pays half of the cms amount).
Tell everyone he never has money and cant see the children more than twice a year because he only works 20 hours a week but is working whenever they try to phone him.
His whole life is just wanky!

😂😂😂 Joining pretend bands like that are what people do when they're teenagers. He was so invested, as an adult, that he was already ironing out future issues!

Mine took his new GF to all the places we used to go to. He stayed in the same hotels, ate in the same restaurants, the same cafes, the same spas. It still makes me laugh! Oh and he spent £450 on candles for her in one month… she must stink?? 🤣

It got worse. He was probably having an affair with her mum and, a few failed relationships later, moved into her house. The mum kicked him out in the end for being a feckless cocklodger and, unless I am very much mistaken, was the person who phoned his boss and got exH sacked for not disclosing a drugs conviction. I applaud her vindictiveness, even if she was shagging my husband.

I’d just found out he was having an affair. We were in a coffee shop with our kids, who were three at the time, when he turned to me and said he was confused — because he could imagine him and the other woman being just as good parents as the two of us were together.
He also caused me to miss being at my dad’s bedside when he died, because he was with her.
Just unforgivable

I mean, we all love a candle but this feels extreme 😂

There are so many but the main ones are refusing to carry the food shopping (1 bag) at the supermarket and leaving it on the till for me. Taking his lightbulbs when he moved out

Is this my ex too, took tv when they were 3 and 5, cushions off sofa so they couldn't sit down and randomley drier?? He was also at his mums, I went round to tackle him about it and his mum said Was a "silly girl" he then slammed the glass door on me and cut my hand badly. Idiot.

I have had such wanky exes, thankfully not now because I'm been to therapy 😂

I was required to cook one such wank-stain breakfast at the weekend and he'd sit in bed like Lord Muck pontificating about what he wanted for about two hours then yell at me that it was "too late" because he "felt sick" (dude they're hunger pangs) and "wouldn't be able to eat anything" because I had "left it too long" and "should have just made something."

And you can bet he would also have kicked off if I'd made something he didn't want too...

You'd think he didn't have any arms or legs 😐

An ex of mine had a photo of himself as a laptop wallpaper. Just him. No one else.

He was dressed up as some film character (probably Batman related), on a night out which I'm presuming was Halloween, but come on!! I've done cringey things in my time but I've never had any urge to look at a photo of myself every time I open a laptop.

a few years ago now when my daughter was in year 6 her school very much encouraged them to form teams of 4 and take part in an interschool triathlon. They were tasked with doing their very best from an athletic perspective (still fun!) & to also raise money for a charity of their teams choice.
Collectively, my daughter and her friends planned run and cycled at weekends, which given their age, was of course coordinated and hosted by the parents plus i paid for additional swim lessons as that was my daughters weak spot. My ex flat refused to take/host/collect as apparently shouldn’t organise things on his time (!). He also refused to help with said swim lessons financially or to sponsor my daughters teams chosen charity.
on the event day itself, he turned up with his girlfriend (who i still have no idea why she came as spent the day Instagramming and showed zero intrest in the event itself!) & his mother, who adore but i kept having to escape from as she wanted to slate said girlfriend ans i was trying to remain neutral!
It was hot day and when my daughters teams choosen charity finished, high as kites from their collective achievements for the charity and all the training we agreed to an ice cream from the ice cream van as a well deserved treat.
All the parents and kids are friends and have known each other socially for years having frequently been to each others houses, parties, parents nights out etc. as we were queuing we were all disputing who would be treating (we are talking max £10 in those days but it was a about the gesture) as we were so proud of their collective efforts and everyone is chatting and laughing. Anyway ex bowls over goes to the front of the queue and announces loudly hes buying an ice cream but for my daughters only it was so awkward and completely killed the buoyant mood. My dear friend intercepted and said no more arguments, she was paying for team ice cream. privately i thanked her & we laughed about him being such a tool! As i say totally not a cash thing, just being difficult and reaffirming why he is an ex!