To ask how many of your wedding guests have died?

[NameChangeMay2026]

It's our anniversary this week, although we are getting divorced.

How many of your guests did you lose in the twenty years after your wedding? I feel like our losses are high. About 85 guests and 15 are gone. Is this normal? Or does it seem high to you too?

Good question. 20y this year.

I think 5 out of 60.

We married in the 90's and only had thirteen guests. We lost my brother in law at age 35 six years later followed by my Mother in law a few years ago,

Lots because most of my wedding guests were old friends of my parents.
My mother's attitude was that they were paying for it so got to say who was invited.

I tried but it didn't help much.

I'm OK. Some days just suck, like this twentieth anniversary. Thanks for caring!

We had 65 and 7 have died . Four much older people but two died before 50

Married 1991, 110 guests. I've never counted but here goes.

The tragic one: cousin's wife, 42, young children. She died within two years - cancer.

4 grandparents all late 80s/90s
2 dear friends, elderly couple 82 and 93
My dad 2001
DH's dad 2008
DH's boss
DH's auntie and uncle
Colleague of DH
Step's brother and BIL

That's 14 and I think we have been v lucky. However, ask me in a couple of years because our mums are nearly 90, and there are lots of rellies now in their 80s. We are mid 60s.

We have a lovely group photo of us and all our guests on our wall of our wedding 8 years ago. And we’ve occasionally joked that we were obviously a curse to relationships as so many of the couples there have split up since then. (When we got engaged we went on holiday with two couples and they both split up later, one couple were at the wedding but I think the other split before then).

I think the only deaths are my two uncles who are standing at the front of the picture, one on the far left and one on the far right.

We were talking about this, 18 years married, 70 something guests, 7 have died. I look through the pictures and it sends shivers down my spine at the people who are gone now

DH & I often count! It was a happy day, 1998, bringing everyone together. Aside from my mum, who bitched about it after years of silence only recently to my DD.
We were among the first of friends and a cohort of cousins to marry, so very few kids.
One parent gone out of 4
7 out of 12, aunts and uncles gone
My mum's insistence invites, 5, mostly very old.
One young adult who'd been born with health problems lived for many more years then expected. Her and her sister were the cutest kids in the photos, the sister now has her own children, all healthy. They are the group I feel most emotional about.
The saddest thing is due to geography, money, kids, work we've mostly lost touch with so many friends. We were so close and occasionally, if we see people we still have such a good time but it's once a decade rather than at the time every few months at a minimum. I see most of the relatives even less!

Married 22 years. Around 65 guests for the day part, 5 of them that I can think of have died (3 were my grandparents, 1 was my uncle and the other one of my husband’s aunts). My cousin also died in that time, but she wasn’t at the wedding due to living in a care facility with severe learning difficulties and they said she couldn’t attend even though I wanted her there if she could.

We had around 200 at the evening and I couldn’t tell you how many from that as a lot were customers from my parents pub, so aren’t really people I’ve stayed close to.

My parents were only 21 when they had me, and I got married at 24, so they’re still very young really. My husband was 36 when we got married, and his parents are obviously older than mine, but both still with us. I’m sorry you have lost both of yours so early in life.

So sorry for your losses OP.
That is a very sad story. Your poor friend.
And I can’t imagine how upset his Dad would’ve been finding him and then knowing he died so suddenly and that it was probably preventable.
There needs to be better education on DVTs so people can recognise them.

And even with the nhs unfortunately they focus on swelling and redness as symptoms so if you have “only” pain you or even healthcare professionals might not realise it’s a DVT.

The reason I asked was because I had a DVT after a short haul flight abroad last year. I had a sharp pain in my leg and thankfully on the 5th day I took myself to a&e (wish I’d gone earlier!) . By that point it had actually reached my lungs (pulmonary embolism) and I had to be admitted on the ward for a week.

The healthcare i had abroad was wonderful and obviously I am still alive, but it scared me a lot. I’m grateful they took it seriously when I went to a&e and took bloods within a couple of hours and a CT scan after the bloods came back.

I only had a sharp pain in my leg, no redness or swelling. I fear in the UK they wouldn’t have acted so swiftly.

Please everyone - walk every hour on long haul or even short haul flights and stay hydrated - and if anything feels off when getting off a plane don’t be afraid to get it checked out immediately.

120 guests, 23 years, 8 dead.

This is a dark but amazing thread. Would have been married 21 years (divorce ongoing); two guests/witnesses; one died 8 years after the wedding in her 40s. I think of her almost every day.

12 people in 13 years from a guest number of 58 so pretty high 😔 One was very young and a good few were unexpected so very sad.

Yes, that accounts for a few of mine.

The death of my sister-in-law was a shock, and really unfair. She had breast cancer, and five-year survival rates for all stages of primary breast cancer at diagnosis is now 92%. But she had an unusually aggressive type, and she was gone in three years at age 57. And she was right in the middle of so much, and her son was only 15. At our wedding, we never dreamed she'd be gone just ten years later. Poor F. Her husband and son have not been happy since.

I’ve been married almost 9 years. Was a very small wedding and out of the 10 guests, 3 have sadly passed away. Two were our elderly mums 83 and 90, but other was DH’s sister who died suddenly and was only in her late 50s.

Married 23 years, 60 attendees (58 guests, excluding us) 8 have died. 5 were in the first few years with only 3 more recently.

I got married 24 years ago but the marriage didn't last more than a few years.

It was a small registry office wedding of around 50 people in attendance.

5 of those are dead, 3 from my family and 2 from my ex's..

Small wedding five years ago. Only one person has died, my groom.

We had a small wedding 17 years ago and 2 guests have died since (both my grandparents 😔). We're also divorced.

Oh wow, I had no idea that a DVT could be only pain. I thought there would be a red swelling. That's useful to know.

I'm so glad you got treatment and were OK! Had reached your lungs and you were in hospital for a week - yikes!!

Oh, I am so sorry. 💐

11 years married next week. We had a small wedding abroad so only 24 people, including us. We’ve lost both my parents, my two aunts and my father in law in that time. I’m glad we got married when we did as even a few months later and a few people wouldn’t have been well enough to be there.

20 years, 6 dead.

50% here.

Married 28 years ago. 8 guests, 4 deaths. The guests were 4 parents and 4 siblings. Lost 3 parents and 1 sibling. Of the remaining 4, 3 have had very close calls. Only one healthy one and that’s my little brother!