AIBU to ask my daughter not to bring her dog to stay?

[ForZanyTraybake]

My daughter and her husband are coming to stay with me in July, they come every summer and stay for about three weeks. This year I've asked them not to bring their German shepherd as I find it quite annoying as it barks constantly being in strange surroundings and my neighbours have also complained. Aibu to ask that they put it into kennels? I don't want to upset them as I love their company and look forward to seeing them. Thanks.

I couldn’t host a dog for three weeks
it’s a huge ask of anyone
also the constant barking would drive me to distraction
can they all stay for less time?

Just be prepared for them not to come.

YANBU but I’d be surprised if they still came

Your house, your rules, but be prepared for them not to come.

I don't visit my parents much as they're not animal people and putting our dog into kennels every time we visit is just too expensive.

It's pretty late notice for them to find kennels for 3 weeks in July when it is already June. I would imagine they won't now be able to come unfortunately due to the last minute change of plan.

I wouldn't want to host a barking dog for three weeks, but I'm also aware of how expensive kennels are and I don't think my DD would want to leave her dog for so long.

Presumably they live some way from you if they are coming for this amount of time? I'd be prepared for them to either cut their visit short or not come at all.

Of course not. I wouldn’t have a day gain my house ever.

You're not unreasonable to ask, and they won't be unreasonable if they decline.

Yanbu as long as you have given them plenty of notice that you can't accommodate the dog this year

Gives them opportunity to make alternative arrangements, or cancel if they don't feel able to leave the dog

As a dog owner I would completely understand someone not wanting me to bring my dog on a 3 week visit. I would respect that but I wouldn't leave my dog in kennels for 3 weeks so I wouldn't be able to come.

They shouldn't be offended for you asking them not to bring the dog but you shouldn't be offended if they cancel.

Every good kennel around us is long since booked for the summer, so they might struggle at short notice. I wouldn’t put my dog in for three weeks, I would do a week or 10 days though if I had sufficient notice to book somewhere decent and had a dog that managed okay.

I wouldn't want to host a dog either
You are not being unreasonable

putting a dog into kennels isn’t that simple unfortunately, especially at that time of year.
They would need time to check out appropriate kennels, ensure that the dog is comfortable, immunised and then there is the cost and availability.
It’s your home and your rules but be prepared for them not to come. I personally would never choose to put my dog into kennels for 3 weeks, so it would be a no from me.

I think it’s rude that they bring the dog without checking. If they went on holiday I assume it would be put in the kennels? I bed your daughter is late 20’s, for some reason this generation seems to think that they can trample on their parents boundaries whilst upholding their own (from experience).

You’re not unreasonable to ask but it’s very short notice for this July. If this was our family I’d have to cancel coming as I’d not be able to get kennels/care in place at that short notice so if you’re ok that they may not be able to come then go ahead but you’re not unreasonable to ask for that going forward to the next time they visit.

YANBU to not want the dog there but YABU to have left it this late to decide you don't want it to come.

I wouldn't go unless I could take my dog as my dog would hate the kennels and would be massively distressed by it. Plus I wouldn't do that anyway for 3 weeks as its too long and would be quite costly.

Therefore I would not be going to visit.

if I were you I would suck it up and leave it this time but maybe mention it while they are there that next time you would rather they didn't bring it. That way they at least have time to make some acceptable other arrangements for their pet.

Also give your neighbours a heads up that they are coming and apologise in advance for any noise it might make for those few weeks.

Can't they stay in a dog friendly air bnb instead?

This.

As PP have said, you’re not being unreasonable, but also they wouldn’t be unreasonable to have to cancel the trip. There’s no way I’d put my dog into kennels for 3 weeks so I would cancel the visit or reduce it to a few days.
Even if I had a friend available to have my dog, I wouldn’t leave it for 3 weeks anyway.
you’re not unreasonable for not wanting the dog there, but you can’t then be unreasonably upset if they cancel the visit.

You say you’ve already asked them. Were they upset?

I would imagine the likelihood of finding a dog friendly b&b for three weeks availability for July would be just as unlikely as finding a kennels with such short last minute space.

You're completely within your rights to ask them not to bring the dog, but this could mean they visit less.

My in-laws don't let us bring our dog to stay. That's fine but it does make our visits less frequent as he can't stay in kennels (he was so scared the only time we tried it that they called us to pick him back up). That means we either have to pay for a sitter at home or arrange it for when my mum is free to dog sit. Even if their dog copes with kennels, 3 weeks is a long time and will be expensive and probably not that nice for the dog.

I absolutely would not leave my dog in kennels for 3 weeks. A week at most. It's extremely expensive and stressful for both the dog and the owners. Personally I wouldn't visit my own mum under those circumstances, but she would've completely understood. It's also very late in the day for them to book the dog into kennels even if they wanted to, which I strongly suspect they won't.

As others have said they may not come as this is quite short notice to try and get Kennels, the ones we use were fully booked for summer by Easter.
plus it’s a massive expense ours is around £200/week not including extras such as country walks, a bath, extra heating.
if my dad wouldn’t accommodate my dog I would only be going up once or twice a year for a couple of nights rather than 6/7 times for up to a week at a time

Why have you left it so late? If they come every summer you should have voiced this about 4 months ago.

If you've had the dog every other time why would they assume this summer was any different?