AIBU to think this dinner spread will be enough for nine?

[geminicancerean]

Nine people for dinner tomorrow, 6 adults, 3 kids. It’s going to be really hot. 5 of the guests will have travelled some of the day.

I’ve actually been unwell this week so have relied on M&S to do the actual work. DH isn’t sure my planned spread is going to feed everybody so I’d like some opinions

I have bought:
2 quiches (one bacon and cheese, one cheese and onion)
2 packets hot flaked salmon
Ingredients for big Greek style salad (cucumber, tomatoes, red onion, feta etc)
Big bag of green salad
2 big pots of pasta, pesto and pine nut salad
6 sausage rolls
Big bag of M&S wotsits
Big bag of M&S bacon crisps
Huge double punnet of strawberries
Meringue nests
Cream
oh and cake

The sausage rolls and crisps are for whoever wants them but I obvs had the kids in mind picking those - I know all three kids like these things and eat them.

So that’s it. I think it’s enough. DH suspicious and thinks we might need ‘extras’.

Over to you Mumsnet (don’t worry, I’m braced for criticism and I can take it!)

You want me to make everyone a cake? Did I read that right? Everyone? Um, right.

Exactly. I’d just delegate.

5 guests would not eat the chilli.

What do you like? I’m sending DH out in a minute so I’ll ask him to get it for you.

I would be worried about passing on the illness to guests, and would postpone the whole thing. And live on cake.

No, I said quite early on, ‘thanks for this, I will buy more food’

If you read the whole post she's clearly being sarcastic. She also said 20 sausage rolls and a side of salmon each!

I think PercyPigs thought it was very witty joke worthy of Punch or Private Eye and that it absolutely needed sharing on here.

I’m glad you’re buying more op. My suggestion would be not to buy more of the same but alternatives. If a guest won’t eat quiche then something substantial as an alternative is needed.
The desserts and salad options are ample. I think another pack of sausage rolls, crusty bread and butter, a rotisserie chicken and bought mayo will be perfect.

Some posters on here need worm medicine. They are eating for thousands.

That said, I like the sound of Big Steve. A large cricketer unashamed of his appetite for pastry. Is he single? My friend is looking.

I don't agree with this take.

Bar ND, children should be encouraged to eat everything their parents do. Mine hated going to friends where it was just "nuggets and chips" or whatever.

If the child has barriers on texture etc, fair enough but that wouldn't make it kid friendly, more ND friendly

My intention was to chop them in halves or quarters if huge, macerate them with a bit of mint and lime and serve them in the meringue nests. But clearly if I do that my family will all starve to death.

Huh ?

What about adding a load of chicken nuggets and chips, OP?

Your desserts are fine

i think there are broadly two types of buffet preparers - cooks and bakers. OP is a baker

my mum is the former and puts on a magnificent spread but dessert will be a choc mousse or tarte train with ice cream and some fruit

whereas mil puts out a bowl of potato salad, some sausages and a veg which is underwhelming but then brings out at least 6 different cakes and tray bakes that would be enough to feed the local primary school

in both cases you leave full!!

Won’t anyone think of the vegans! (Which the OP doesn’t have in her group but few of the responses on this thread bear any relation to what she’s posted re their dietary preferences etc so what the heck)

Add two kids friendly pizzas, deli meats, a cheese board, a couple crusty baguettes and maybe some hummus/dips/ crudités.

I think the revised more-food plan sounds lovely. I might pop out myself and do similar and we will have a picnic tea.

Hope you feel better OP and have a good time.

I think the easiest way to do it is have a fair bit more than you think you will need and items that can be frozen to prevent waste.

We have 10 adults and 3 children here later for a BBQ and way more food than we will probably need, but nothing will get thrown away or wasted.

If I were feeding vegans I would give them vegan food. This thread is batshit.

Would you like me to get you houmous and crudités?

My kid has ARFID and would starve if I used your method. But thanks for your opinion.

Well 3 won’t eat the strawberries

It’s utterly batshit. I filtered and read your posts last night and then a few more this morning and want to compliment you on your good humour dealing with people who CBA to read your posts or do simple cake maths.
Hope you’re feeling better and have a lovely day.

The poster who mentioned vegans was making the same point. That "thinking of the vegans" would be as ridiculous as most of the other advice people have given. She literally said that in her second sentence.

So everyone has stopped reading properly now. At least 2 comments that are sarcastically in support of OP have been misread.

I would like some devilled eggs.
Can anyone make me some?