AIBU to report nut-containing muffins being brought into a nut-free school?

[AlmondFlourmuffins]

I’m really conflicted whether to keep quiet about something or not . If I say something it will be completely obvious it was me that reported.

Dd best friend always takes in a homemade muffin to school as has packed lunch. Dd had a play date and when I picked her up said that she had some and can we make them for her lunches after the half term break so I asked for the recipe.
One was a ‘Bakewell muffin’ made with almond flour and glace cherries the other was a peanut butter chocolate and banana marbled muffin. The thing is it’s a nut free school and when I said ‘oh I’m surprised you’ve got away with this’ after she shared the recipe she just laughed. Now I’m feeling like it’s wrong?

I know in the class there are no nut allergies but I have no idea obviously about the rest of the year/school. But if I say something is it going to cause a massive problem ? This is dd best friend and I just don’t know what to do ?

Dairy is equally as dangerous as any other allergy - the only reason it doesn’t account for more anaphylaxis episodes is because it is commonly outgrown in early childhood (when anaphylactic reactions are rare). It is one of the few allergens where aerosolisation is a real risk.

Allergy UK do not recommend 'nut free' policy for school as it is impossible to enforce and leads to a false sense of awareness. It would be better for the school to ensure the allergic children's risks are reduced in other ways.

Where does it end? Never being allowed to use nuts in the kitchen at home in case a trace finds its way into school? Where does it end? Have you read the posts about dairy? Cheese sandwiches are not banned in schools.

I would tell them to get stuffed. Where does it end?

This myth that children can die from being in the same room as a trace of nuts has long since been debunked.

If that were the case we would have children dying all over the place, nuts would be a banned substance everywhere as they would be considered to be toxins, or alternatively nut allergic children would never be able to leave their houses for fear that the next shop, house, restaurant, bus or train they entered might have contained a trace of nuts which would be about to kill them.

We need to look at the middle ground between trivialising serious food allergies or overplaying them to the extent that nobody will take them seriously because so much of the talk around them has been exaggerated to strike fear and guilt into people. It has entirely the opposite effect.

By far the biggest reason for children dying from nut allergies is when they reach secondary school and are suddenly faced with an environment where they haven’t been protected against the need to manage their own allergies.

A reception age child absolutely can learn to manage their allergies and not accept food from other people. But we as a society choose not to give them that responsibility, and instead wrap them up in a protective bubble which is far more harmful to them in the long run.

If the child isn’t yet able to manage their allergy then it’s the parents, and the school’s job to do it and that doesn’t mean by banning them altogether, it means by ensuring that the child is supervised around food to ensure they’re not being given nut based products.

The fact that people say “it’s easier to ban nuts than dairy” just shows that nut bans are more about virtue signalling rather than concern for children. If both allergies can be equally severe, and clearly they can, then a genuine organisation or person will seek to ensure that the child is shielded from both, not just pick the easy one and hope for the best when it comes to the other one.

So in essence, either you’re concerned about protecting children from allergies, or your’re not.

It needs to be about education, not shielding.

Where does it end? Hopefully not in the death of a child.

Exactly.

Maybe when it's you or your child?

Not my responsibility.

Why don't you mention it to the mum fgs? I am sure she's not doing it deliberately. Maybe she's not doing it at all or if she is it's because she doesn't realise or is not thinking straight. Just speak to her first.

Yep. Proving my point right there.

Exactly. Children with dairy allergies have to learn from before they can speak not to accept food from anyone. Not to eat any food without checking ingredients. And they have to navigate a world where dairy is sloshing about everywhere like it's the most benign substance

I lost count of the times we left playgrounds as other children were coated in ice cream or walking on the equipment dripping ice cream

Mine have nut allergies too so I am obviously not dismissing those allergies. But it's deeply hypocritical to get all high and mighty about people taking nuts to school/eating nuts before school if your own child is trotting off to school with a cheese sandwich and a yoghurt.

Milk allergy is very common. There will be children with milk allergy in every year group in a primary school.

This is exactly why a nut free policy at school isn’t recommended. It’s a false sense of safety.

Also nothing stopping another child to of eaten something with nuts in before school or on the way to school and have crumbs on them.

Best to assume all food you haven’t made and school hasn’t made has nuts.

Never rely on others to keep you safe basically.

Refer your friend and the school to Benedicts Law

There isn't really anyone that you cannot "report" to. The school can only really remind the parent that they have a no nut policy. I think you should do that and cut out the middle man and aggro it might cause.

The problem with blanket "no nut" rules is that most parents don't think they matter. And sometimes they don't, because they are in place even when there are no pupils with a relevant allergy. Whereas if you said "we have a pupil with a severe allergy and to protect them there is a no nut policy until further notice", there could be more buy-in.

So this took place at someone's house? And nobody in that house has nut allergy and neither does your child? And on top of that no-one in the school class has one?

I think you could remind them not to share it around in school as it might get confiscated by the teachers. But it's really not your concern.

@AlmondFlourmuffins Aren't school nutsfree to prevent from choking? I haven't heard of any school banning children from bringing almondflour muffins. In that case dairy should be banned as well.

I think blanket bans are ridiculous. My daughter has a severe allergy to something and she has had to learn how to manage it since preschool. The school won’t ban it so we have to ensure she can keep herself safe. This makes her more vigilant and is better long term I think!

I’ve linked a graph showing the figures for anaphylactic deaths in the UK below.
I’m not talking about dairy here, which is certainly dangerous for allergic children, but in general terms some allergens are less likely to result in anaphylactic deaths than others are.

Overall, peanuts/nuts cause more deaths. In adults they result in more deaths than all the other allergens combined, which is why they are more feared perhaps.

And as usual we have people bringing out the guilt trip that “hopefully you won’t cause a child’s death.”

Let’s not throw that one around shall we?

The people responsible for keeping that child safe are their parents and the school. You do that by making children aware that if child x eats certain foods they become seriously ill and that’s why we don’t eat that food near child x.

You don’t tell all the other children that “you can’t have those foods, even for breakfast at home any more, and you’re not allowed to know why, but just know that if you do someone might die.

Who does that benefit?

If a child’s allergies are that severe they need to be home schooled. You don’t have the right to restrict foods for all children because of one.

Food is emotive enough as it is, without this apparent need to use it as a guilt stick to beat children with.

And before someone starts about the child’s right to privacy etc, if a disability is visible you have no choice but to be noticed and for people to be aware.

If you want people to be aware of your condition and take it into account you need to tell them about it, not just decide that they should all be punished because of your right to privacy.

It’s not just pupils, DC had a wonderful primary teacher who has a severe nut allergy, if one of the younger kids eats a nut-laced snack and gets too close (like the little ones do sometimes) that could trigger a terrible reaction.

When DD was in a class with a dairy allergic child, (from 4yo) they taught the whole class how to be safe. They had rules such as milk could only be drunk at one table (as they had their free milk) then they all washed their hands and faces abd the table was wiped down. Absolutely no food swapping. And obviously she got a special school lunch.

This is how it should be done.

My sister has a severe airborne nut allergy so she doesn’t even have to come into contact with the nuts to go into anaphylaxis. I wouldn’t hesitate to report this and that’s exactly where my mind would have gone when she gave the recipe. People who think it’s their right to eat nuts wherever they want when it could actually kill someone are nothing but selfish a-holes in my opinion.

Around 2 to 3% of kids have a nut allergy, so it's a minority. And airborne allergies are unbelievably rare and most have been shown to only cause a mild reaction.

Most 4 year olds can poop by themselves and wipe their bums so yes, they can learn to only eat their own lunch.

There is more chance of a ceiling falling down in an earthquake in the UK and killing a child than a child having a severe reaction to a lunch box being opened.