AIBU to think using their voucher only on their share was rude?

[Dinnerdrama]

We were invited out to dinner with friends at the weekend.They planned to visit a particular restaurant and asked if we’d like to go along.
We had a nice enough meal, couple bottles of wine, liqueurs. All quite pleasant for a Friday night.
When the bill arrived one of our friends presented a voucher and asked for the bill to be halved and the voucher taken off theirs. The waiter seemed slightly bemused and repeated back the request. Our friend repeated and clarified they wanted the bill split and the voucher taken off their half.
I almost died of second hand mortification. Is this not CF of the highest order?! I wouldn’t dream of doing this when I invited people out. If I was that skint, I’d use the voucher as a couple and
not invite others along.
For the record, I have been out for a meal previously with them where I have had a voucher and I had the voucher taken off the whole bill and split the remainder.
Cannot believe the brass neck, it has put me off going out with them again. Massively embarrassed on their behalf, not sure why, they didn’t seem to be!!

They had an extra glass of wine each. I wouldn’t have batted an eye at this

So why the fuck didnt you point that out?

"Oh dont forget the extra wine you had"

How did they come by the voucher? Was it a reward from the restaurant for eating from there so much, a credit card reward, a gift from family / colleagues?

Oh I know, just a lot of replies basing this some vibe rather than actually thinking it through. I think a lot of people defended the o.p thinking it was a discount voucher I.e 15% off, and now don't want to admit they are wrong

You've said you are going to cut these friends out, that's more than being surprised because you haven't seen people spend their own money vouchers on themselves before.

Now so many people have explained another point of view you are still convinced that they should have paid £50 towards your meal. How is that not feeling entitled?

Leaves a sour taste for sure.

You won't be dining out with them again.

What?

You mean if someone gave me a cash gift?

Why would someone give me a cash gift and say that it’s only to be used at a particular restaurant?

If someone gave me cash, I’d put it in my purse I suppose, like a normal person.

But they didn’t pay £35
They paid £135

This thread has highlighted to me the lack of financial understanding in many people in the UK.

It reminds me of people who get credit cards because it’s ‘free’ money.

I think OP is missing the point that the voucher is the same equivalent as them paying by card or cash. It's not a discount card. If it had been they had a 10% discount code and only used on their share that would be rude. Even a voucher from a email sign up giving buty one meal get one free would also be off if they hadn't told you to do the same sign up.
But to use their own gift vouchers to pay for their share seems fine to me and no different to splitting the bill and you paying card and them cash.
My friends will do this, get vouchers for birthday gifts and then use them when appropriate. As we all have kids you don't get constant babysitters so if we go for a meal that they have vouchers for then they use for their share. I have never questioned it or thought that it was rude, it's just an alternate way to pay.

There is nothing generous about you based on this thread... But it must be hard to understand what that word means from your moral high horse.

Perhaps that’s how they afford multiple holidays though, by being frugal and not using their gift vouchers on friends!

my brother and sister in law did this to me years ago with another CF layer on top,
We all went for a family meal, me ,DH and my 4 kids, them and 3 kids and my parents, i offered to pay for my parents so 8 shares out of 13 were mine,
SIL had tesco vouchers , she used these to reduce the total balance and we all paid what we were owed, very kind of her ect,
The next day i got a text from DB asking me to transfer £30 to make up for the vouchers that they could have used to offset their shopping .
Im still flabbergasted now,

They have always been tight despite being the highest earners in the family.

They always let my mum pay for everything on visits, from entry fees to cafes,
I always will treat them when i can .

They also would turn up to our big boxing day lunches empty handed, and would drink DH expensive red wine i had bought him for Christmas every time,

In the end we used to buy cheap wine and put it out and DH would keep his nice wine hidden and top it up on the sly,

On one of our lunches we needed some white wine for the sauce, and DB offered to to go to the shop to get some,
I offered him the £5 expecting him to refuse it, but of course he took it …

We no longer have them round for family lunches thankfully

I took my mum to stay at a fancy hotel, and we had lunch there, my treat,
They live near so joined us for the day, I knew they would not be happy paying the prices
I heard SIL say she wouldn't have a side that cost extra, as “your mum is getting chips “ , she then whipped a few chips on my poor mums plate 😳

They boasted about a time on holiday in France they went to a cafe and had a nice drink each, but got the waiter to give the 3 kids tap water ,
They were very pleased with themselves, and said the waiter approved , ( im sure he didn’t )

If i mention to my mum about him being tight, she will tell me he is very generous

Ive waited years to get that off my chest !

Last Christmas, DM gave me and DP £100 to spend at a local restaurant that we've wanted to go to for ages and doesn't sell gift cards (also included babysitting).

Using OPs logic, if and DP and I went for dinner at that restaurant and another couple came with us, do you think I should I use the cash from DM's Christmas present to reduce everyone's bill by £100?

ETA: I still think it's poor etiquette to invite friends out to dinner at a specific restaurant then whip out a £100 gift card for that restaurant when your half of the bill arrives (just go by yourself). But, I also think it's bizarre to think that you're entitled to a share in someone else's gift card.

I can’t believe I’ve been sucked back into this but here we are.

The action of whipping out a gift card which is used to reduce and therefore recalculate the total bill is different to throwing £100 on the table and saying here’s my share. I mean if you don’t understand that I can go into further detail and explain why if you like…?

oops I see you edited your post as I was replying.

I also don’t think the OP was suggesting she was ‘entitled’ to anything. I think she was taken aback by the gesture, as I would be, if two reasonably solvent couples were dining together and one couple did such a thing. No one in my circle would do that.

Please do but I'm still struggling to understand why anyone would think they're entitled to a share in someone else's gift card.

Scenario a) DM gives me and DP £100 cash to spend at a local French restaurant (they don't do gift cards). Am I expected to use this to reduce the total bill amongst friends?

Scenario b) DM gives me and DP a £100 gift card to spend at a local French restaurant. Am I expected to use this to reduce the total bill amongst friends?

If the answers to scenario a and b are different, why?

I had a gift voucher from my work colleagues for garden centres. I went recently and brought home £100 of nice things for my garden. If I’d have gone with my friend would I have been expected, by this logic, to let my friend spend half of the voucher on gardening goods for herself?

You want me to explain why whipping out a gift card is different to whipping out £100?

😂 you don’t know the difference?

Ok now it’s clarified I’d change my vote to urbu That kind of voucher is the same as cash. However I wouldn’t have the brass to use it as a group setting and would
be using it as a couple dining.
but essentially I don’t think they have been tight.

You seem financially illiterate

Well only speaking for myself and what I would do and would feel is appropriate then yes they are different. Because cash, even if it is given to me and I am told what I am to spend it on can go in my pocket and I might spend some of it before hand or pay it into my account and it's not necessarily (or even likely) that actual cash I spend at the restaurant. Where I would pay on card anyway.

A gift card can only be spent at that one place. It means I am required to spend £100 less of my own money. I would therefore feel like that was a £100 off the total bill. I wouldn't feel comfortable taking that £100 only off half of it.

Are you expected to feel the same? No. But that is my explanation for why I would expect myself to treat those two things differently.

Well that’s kind of harsh, but ok. I can explain my logic here if you like. I can start with - no one, ever, as a point of etiquette, would invite someone to a garden centre and get to the till with their geraniums and their mulch, and look at their friend with their ferns and fertiliser and say shall we split the bill? You can probably take it from there…..

Yes please

No I don’t sorry

Yes please. As I don't understand how someone paying their share with a gift card is different to them paying with a bank card or cash.