AIBU to expect parents to tidy up in cafés?

[wrinklycactus]

Since having a baby I've had a different perspective on lots of things.. including the mess left by some parents in cafes/ restaurants with babies and toddlers in high chairs.

I was in M&S cafe yesterday looking for somewhere to sit with my toddler, and the only free table looked like an absolute bomb site - crumbs and spillages everywhere, high chair a total mess - they'd just left it for the poor staff to clean up.

I appreciate I only have one kid to think about, but I always clean up after feeding him in a cafe if we've made a massive mess (and we are BLW so we definitely do make a mess!)

Obviously I don't worry about every crumb but I couldn't live with leaving a table in the state that I saw yesterday.

I know there are circumstances where you have to leave in a rush and kids are having meltdowns etc, I'm not talking about that - just talking about generally leaving your bomb site for the staff to clean up or the next person to inherit!

AIBU to think this is just rude and inconsiderate?

I would never leave a table or high chair (when mine were little) in such a state. It’s part of the reason I carried baby wipes!

Loads of skanks there.

YABU. Part of what you're paying for in a cafe is not having to clear up your own mess. You can stay at home for that.

YANBU in general but I think all the posters who do BLW in public are unreasonable.

Accidents happen but purposely putting a child in a high chair knowing they're going to throw food everywhere should be done at home whether you clean it up or not.

I always clear up when I've taken GC out for food but generally a staff member comes over and tells me to leave it and they will do it. I still clear up but I wonder if they think I'm just a poor old souls who can't do it. I'm in my 70s.

So you would walk away and leave a table a complete disgusting mess would you?

The staff are paid to clear the tables not clean up a total mess made by lazy entitled people (sounds like you are one of them)

Young man and older lady in my local McDs always tell me to leave it. She saw me clearing up last week and shouted out to me to leave it.

No, I wouldn't make a complete disgusting mess in the first place.

Well then, this thread does not apply to you does it?

Are we only allowed to post on this thread if we are disgusting? Who made you the thread police?

You said the OP was being unfair as you are paying in a cafe to have your table cleaned/cleared. Well of course you are but the OP's question was is it ok to walk away having left a disgusting mess which is a different question to the one you seem to be answering.

So surely by saying the OP is unfair you are saying it is ok to leave a table in a disgusting mess?

This isn't Am I Being Unfair, is it? I didn't mention anything about being unfair.

OK so I used the word unfair instead of unreasonable - big deal. You are being extremely petty. Either you think it is ok to walk away and leave a disgusting mess for staff to clean up or you don't. If you think it ok just because there "are staff to do that" that you (or anyone that does it) are disgusting and entitled.

I'm neither disgusting or entitled. I don't leave a mess for anyone to clean up.

But kids can be messy and cafes employ staff to keep the place running smoothly. The OP mentioned crumbs and spillages, not a "disgusting mess". That was you. YABU.

It's not about 'huffing and puffing', showing annoyance or treating customers like enemies, though - that's an odd extrapolation to make. If some customers are thoughtless enough to leave an anti-social level of mess behind them, obviously it puts a business owner over a barrel, if they're rude about it they'll lose repeat business. Having said that, presumably if you were expected to clean up shit and vomit as per some of the anecdotes on this thread, you wouldn't want that particular customer back anyway?

The staff will have to clean up again anyway.

I think it was perfectly obvious OP wasn't just talking about a few crumbs or a bit of spillage.

Yes, kids can be messy, but a self-respecting parent will at least make some effort to reduce the mess levels if they're especially bad. People who don't do that absolutely are entitled in my book, and selfish to boot.

She literally says "crumbs and spillages everywhere, high chair a total mess."

Exactly. Not just a few crumbs or a bit of mess.

Another sign of the decline in good manners in society.
People are so selfish and entitled. They should be mortified to leave a public space in such a state.

Did you read my whole comment or just the bit where I said it was their job 🙄🙄🙄

You're the one who brought "a few" into the conversation. "Crumbs and spillages." Not a disgusting mess.

Ah, linguistic nitpicking. Always a sure sign someone's on the defensive.

At this point it's blindingly obvious you're one of the people who thinks it's fine to leave a mess, you might as well just own it.

YADNBU!!!

parents are the worst. Absolute worst. I have a friend who works in a lovely family cafe and once I apologised for the mess cause I’d done a bit of a bum job of cleaning up, and she said oh no, at least you try, some parents frequently leave soiled nappies after a change ON THE PLATE then leave. My word.

Ugh, what is wrong with some people?! 🤢

That's just reminded me that when I had a Saturday job in my teens, clearing tables in a department store cafeteria, someone once came across a dirty nappy left on a table. But on an actual plate... barf

I suspect even those on the thread who are arguing it's fine to leave a mess would draw the line at that. Then again, maybe not... 🤷‍♀️