AIBU to expect parents to tidy up in cafés?

[wrinklycactus]

Since having a baby I've had a different perspective on lots of things.. including the mess left by some parents in cafes/ restaurants with babies and toddlers in high chairs.

I was in M&S cafe yesterday looking for somewhere to sit with my toddler, and the only free table looked like an absolute bomb site - crumbs and spillages everywhere, high chair a total mess - they'd just left it for the poor staff to clean up.

I appreciate I only have one kid to think about, but I always clean up after feeding him in a cafe if we've made a massive mess (and we are BLW so we definitely do make a mess!)

Obviously I don't worry about every crumb but I couldn't live with leaving a table in the state that I saw yesterday.

I know there are circumstances where you have to leave in a rush and kids are having meltdowns etc, I'm not talking about that - just talking about generally leaving your bomb site for the staff to clean up or the next person to inherit!

AIBU to think this is just rude and inconsiderate?

Wow, I bet you’ve never had a child vomit in a cafe!! Neither have I (touch wood, so far), but I can well imagine it being an absolutely chaotic disaster and maybe I just leave in a mortified or worried rush. Maybe the woman’s child was ill, maybe she was unwell herself, you have no idea what she was dealing with.

yes we’ve always cleaned up any excess, like you say not every crumb but I’ve been know to crouch under the table picking up food. I’m always careful not to leave snotty tissues too as I think that’s personal waste that the staff shouldn’t have to dispose of.

People in general, it is not just parents who do this, my nephew works in a restaurant/bar family friendly but mainly young adults, every single shift someone has to clean shit off the bathroom wall. People don’t even flush.

That’d make the majority of people on the thread sanctimonious and prissy, then…

Are you saying it should be fine for people to leave their table looking like a bombsite just because they happen to have children?

I was in a pub at 7pm last week. A whole table of kids, probably 6 or 7 of them aged somewhere between 5-10 were making an absolute racket.

The parents were all sat on a totally separate table and ignoring them.

And yest they left a complete shitshow as well, including wrappers from their own food and drinks they bought in and consumed there!

My youngest two are 11 but I remember so well getting down on my hands and knees with a napkin and wiping up the floor as best I could. It's just disrespectful not too. I'm on jury duty this week, we've just to leave all our lunch rubbish for someone else to sort, it feels so alien and wrong.

YANBU. When I was a bit of a crazy FTM I’d keep a packet of dettol wipes in the baby bag to clean the high chair with, but I’d also be on hands and knees cleaning the floor as best I could. I’ve seen parents walk away from piles of mess left on the floor and felt mortified for them, but they quite shamelessly saunter off and don’t bat an eyelid.

YANBU. I would never have done this and I had 3 under 3.

There is no way I would leave puke, my own or my child’s and not clear it up. That is just skanky.

These replies are hilarious. Bet you would all be happy to be surrounded by dogs in an eating establishment and not bat an eyelid? Society has lost the plot entirely, when dogs are revered and normalised, and children are seen as the enemy.

No one has said children are the enemy but if they make a disgusting mess then the parent(s) should clear it up.

I don't see dogs getting crumbs all over the floor, putting bits of food all over the table, leaving cutlery spread across the table, spilling drink on the floor and table.

The dogs I see lay quietly and well behaved.

Let’s hope you never have to find out.

I don’t like messy people. I think it is selfish and piggy. I also couldn’t think of anything worse than a dog cafe. I love my own dog, she’s a dog who enjoys the fields not a cafe.

I worked in a cinema and a mum came over and said her little boy had had a “bit of an accident” outside one of the screens. Went over to sort it - shit everywhere. On carpet. She was not “rushing off, mortified”. She was just leaving it for someone else.

Perhaps back in 1992 you were allowed to grab the dustpan and brush but you can’t now. Staff have to do it. I usually try to pick most of the food up and use wipes though

I wouldn't usually clean up after myself, assuming the mess was just normal crumbs etc. If I wanted to tidy up after myself I'd save my money and eat at home. The employees of the café are paid to make tables ready for the next customer. If bodily fluids were involved, or if I spilled a drink or something, that's different and I'd gladly help to clean that up.

Oh no!!!! Our child was quite far into potty training but completely unexpected he decided to do a big wee through his shorts on a pub/diner floor, it was a huge place and the toilets were far away.

I was mortified but told staff straight away and offered to clean, but they were so lovely and insisted they did it.

He also vomited in Costa once and again staff insisted they clean it and were really kind.

I try to clean us as best I can with napkins etc but I wouldn’t ask for a dust pan and brush .

I guess you're the person leaving the world around them looking like shit then.
Thanks

And they definitely don't leave crumbs 😀

These are the people bringing up the kids who grow up to drop litter and leave their table McDonalds looking like a war zone. Filthy, inconsiderate and entitled.

It’s the same mentality that means that families with small children who book my Airbnb leave it either looking like the Marie Celeste (literally checked out leaving their breakfast plates, bins full of dirty nappies, my books and games strewn all over the floor, sticky mess everywhere, half eaten stuff in the fridge) or just dirty, crumbs everywhere, stuff mashed into the carpet, marks on walls, half broken things where kids have misused them and my favourite, the remote controls totally missing.
I’ve now banned under 16s and allowed dogs and the place is left pristine everytime. Never again.

I notice lots of people are saying ‘we’ about clearing up. When there’s just you, sometimes the best thing you can do is take your messy child away!

It wasn’t that usual to be eating out all the time when mine were small though. I don’t remember being in that position.

Yes keep the filthy children locked up at home like back in your day

Probably insurance purposes. Staff are paid to do the work. Customers are not.
Diners in a restaurant are not expected to clear the tables and sweep up so why would parents in cafe be expected to?