To think some older women having tax payers funded ivf are hypocrites?

[Spiderbug]

There seems to be a substantial group of people who are ok with calling teen mums a waste of their tax money but then leave child bearing too late and expect the tax payers to foot the bill for their multiple ivf cycles which costs the tax payer up to 100 million a year.

Hypocrites!!!

🤣

OK.

I don’t think it’s possible to have multiple IVF cycles on the NHS. When I had IVF, it was one free go and that’s it. And that was 13 years ago. And that’s because neither my husband or I had any previous children.

Had three more cycles after that and they were £7250 a pop.

Absolutely!

pregnancy during adolescence (below 19 or 18 yo IIRC) also comes with increased health related risks such as preeclampsia, lower birth weight, preterm birth as well.

The socioeconomic risks also considerably higher compared to “older” mothers…

It definitely isn’t more sensible to plan to get pregnant at 15 instead of 30.

As is the case with pretty much everything ever, extremes aren't idea.

Teen pregnancies aren't ideal. Older pregnancies aren't ideal.

Both happen. That's life. And tax-funded medical care is always a good thing. It's better to have it available across the board than to spend the time and energy on debating and deciding if someone's circumstances are worthy enough to use it.

Depends what you consider “old” and “past their fertile prime” the NHS doesn’t widely offer “free” IVF over the age of 37 and for others the cut off is age 40. it’s not like the NHS is funding IVF for women in their mid to late 40s and older

Are you the poster who has a massive axe to grind after you were a teenage mum and think everyone has judged you and now you start goady threads about older mums?

I started ttc at 29 quite soon after marriage. Nothing had happened after 18 months. By the time we’d had all the investigations on the NHS I was 34 by the time we arrived at the (private) IVF clinic. Not my fault I was an “older woman”.

How many women are actually at the intersection of the Venn diagram showing 'older women who have tax payer funded IVF' and 'not nice women who judge teen mums'? I'm thinking it must be a sizable group for you to think it merits discussion? Yet, I confess, I've never met one.

I don't think being pregnant at 15 while still a child is optimal for mother or baby, but fully accept that many will be good parents. Some aren't but then some people of every age aren't and it's a situation where there needs to be support not judgement.

You don't seem to have any sort of insight into the multiple reasons why people need IVF. If you are talking about specific people who judged you then wanting medical interventions because they've left it very late, say so, it would make more sense than many of your comments on this thread.

People usually have IVF because of fertility issues, not necessarily age-related fertility issues. They can only access IVF on the NHS if they're under 40.

Exactly this. Women aren’t stupid. I was a healthy 35 year old when I had IVF and was told there was a one in three chance of it being successful.

The NHS just would no way fund an IVF cycle for a 45 year old woman. They just don’t do that.

I’m not sure I would call them ‘hypocrites’ as often they have 20 years of taxpaying behind them at that point, I’m not bothered if they have 4k of IVF.

As part of the wider conversation though I know 4 couples currently going through IVF who started trying at age 34+. Maybe there are others who haven’t told me too. It does seem like a lot and I think first time parenting after 35 is far from ideal for a whole host of reasons.

What is 'too late' and 'older women...' I 'left it too late (although not by choice and I would suggest it rarely is by choice) and we ended up spending £18,000 to fund our IVF and have our one child.

To be fair there are an awful lot of quite snotty older mums on here who say they can’t think of anything worse (natural disasters? Chronic illness? Abuse?) than being pregnant under the age of 30 and ‘giving up all my fun to change nappies’.

Which begs the question if it’s so awful and no fun to have a child, why then panic and try to cram it in at 38? Just enjoy the fun forever.

Have absolutely no idea what you're talking about. Anyone else understand this?

They are real figures based on real studies. The difference between the average woman's ability to get pregnant as a teenager compared to at 30 is very small.

I understand it, they’re saying the risk goes from tiny to small, even though saying ‘doubled’ sounds scary.

Gosh you sound really bitter . Panic and cram ? Are you for real . Lots of women just don’t want kids until they are older. Sometimes it’s a choice . Sometimes it isn’t due to circumstances. The vast majority of women can still get pregnant before 40ish, that’s why ivf is funded until then and it isn’t funded at 50. Older women getting pregnant is perfectly normal and natural my own mum had me at 38. She didn’t want kids in her teens or 20s and neither did I. I find there is a lot of ageism and snottyness towards older mums on these threads.

🤣🤣🤣
Then all five of my siblings, all 14 of my nephews and nieces as well as my ds and myself were born to older mothers. My dgm had six of her 12 children as an older mum.

Doesn't seem to be having much impact on birth rates locally !

Some?! Really. You know multiple women who judge teen mums and are older, and have more than one IVF cycle on the NHS…

About a fictional study for a fictional illness..

I meant that I don't understand how that relates to the data I shared.

Bitter about what?

I’m talking about posters on here who write snotty messages to younger mums. If you don’t do that then I’m not talking about you, so there’s no need to be triggered.

I’m talking about the panic and cram aspect of what you are saying . It’s judgy and implies things about older mums in general. Most women will get pregnant in their late 30s without problems . That’s why the ivf is still funded at that point .

Because you can do both. You can have a lot of fun for decades and still fit in a child. And it's not remotely 'snotty' to think that having a child at 15 or 16 is a terrible idea, because it has a significant negative effect on the lives of two children.

Why do you read that as them judging your choices though? I had my first at 31, by that time I had a mortgage, job and had travelled a bit. I was glad I had left it a bit later for me personally. Doesn’t mean I’m judging anyone else for their choices. Are you a bit insecure?

No, are you? Because if you read my post I’m only talking about people who post snotty messages to mums under 30 on here, which does happen. Do you do this?