I’m destroying my perfect life

[Worriedmummy1244]

I’ve got the most amazing life, we’ve had our difficulties but overall I’m extremely lucky and I have an amazing husband and 2 beautiful kids 2 and 6.

Every month 4-5 days before my period I get so so angry, I feel horrific, tired, angry, irritable and very depressed

i really struggle with the kids, I don’t tolerate my husband at all. Yesterday I was trying to do some chores and the kids were arguing, my husband was in the garden and I flew into a rage with him. I can shout and cry and it’s like something overtakes my body and I can’t fix it. I am not this person at any other time. I never shout.

I don’t know what to do, it feels like it’s getting worse and my husband is getting really frustrated as it feels like he has to put up with a lot every month. I don’t know how to fix it, sometimes in these days I feel they’d be better off without me.

I feel like a huge failure, how can I stop doing this?

Go to the gp and get on something like a Combined hormonal contraceptive.
Id be looking to address this asap and also get out of the house/ take yourself upstairs / minimise contact with your family.

This sounds pretty awful for them.

How old are you op? In 36 and have always been ratty before my period but I’ve noticed especially since having my toddlers that I get proper rage now every month and wondering if it could be something to do with peri starting ?

OP you’ve had fab advice, also before loading in antidepressants and seeing a GP can you research and try taking antihistamines. The increase in oestrogen spikes histamines that can cause anxiety, stress and is linked to PMDD. It’s more complex and linked to what our body’s can clear during this period of the cycle.

So diet and keeping to a good blood sugar level and low histamine diet may also be something you coukd explore while waiting for support and it’s more simple and gentle on your body, treating the chemical reaction that’s potentially causing the rages.

This was sensitivity to the premenstrual progesterone drop for me.

There are new studies outlining the risk of longterm, sometimes irreversible impact SSRIs can have on sex drive.
I'm not saying don't take them, but ensure you're making a fully informed decision.

Thanks everyone so much I will make a GP appointment and look into the lifestyle stuff

I just thought they would say everyone gets moody around their period you just have to control it!

Ah you poor thing, it's absolutely horrible. I got diagnosed last year with PMDD and now take fluoxetine from day 15 until the start of my period. My mood has been like night and day, and it was almost immediate. Whether it's a placebo effect or not doesn't matter as I'm a much nicer person now, and my kids won't grow up worrying about treading on eggshells for parts of the month. I hope you get help and feel better soon x

Interestingly (or perhaps not as I had read this thread earlier, so it flicked "on" the algorithm, but it is a new article), this was on the front page of BBC for me - Life with PMDD: 'Like the Grim Reaper coming every month'

Perhaps you have seen, but an article onPMDD has appeared on the BBC website overnight! www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cx21kypwpzno

It’s more than just being a bit moody (or “being a female 🙄). It’s a hormone imbalance. And whilst it’s a chemical imbalance, don’t underestimate the effect it can have on you all whilst you don’t take steps to address it.

Citalopram completely stopped this for me. I was never diagnosed but my experience was very similar to yours. I started taking citalopram for anxiety

Saw this, might be a helpful read :

Living with PMDD is like having the Grim Reaper visit every month https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cx21kypwpzno

Oh god sorry didn’t realise the same link had already been posted

Go to your GP and tell them you have a hormone imbalance, they can help.

There's a diary and some other resources on this website: https://www.iapmd.org/
Good luck with your GP and do push if you don't feel they are taking it seriously

What the fuck, it's not "being female", it's an illness, not all women get it just like not all women get ovarian cancer. It's not just a bit of PMS. The ignorance.

Of course OP should seek treatment but your post is ridiculous.

No I think both things can be true.

Typical mumsnet, people are allowed to have mental health problems but if they ever show any actual SYMPTOMS of mental health problems they are evil witches who should hide themselves away from their families. Of course she should not minimise contact with her children FFS.

Snap OP. Changing my contraceptive pill saved me and my family. Ask your GP for advice. You'll be ok X

I have lost 5 years of life to this, eventually spoke to GP. She has changed me to mini pill and I was a new woman after 6 weeks. I know HRT is all the rage but it is amazing how our hormones affect us.

I had this exactly the same. Explosive rages and it was horrible for everyone. These were completely fixed by the Mirena coil. Good luck.

Go and see your GP!!

As others have said, it sounds like PMDD. I was diagnosed last year. My GP upped my antidepressants because I didn’t want to take the pill. It has helped a lot. It was frightening though, completely losing control and becoming a person I didn’t want to be and really hated.

It’s PMDD. I suffer with it and it’s horrible so I hear you. I personally have found going on Sertraline hugely helpful in managing the luteal phase. I take it continuously but there’s option to take just in the luteal phase. I’d speak to a good female GP if you have one at your surgery

I went through a spell of PMDD. They give you Prozac for it - although I never understood it why she told me to take it for ten days running up to my period…. It worked amazingly. Like from the first month.

Just wanted to suggest Progesterone. I've been on it since my baby and it's really helped with PCOS pains and anger xx