To really dread weekends?

[frillonit]

Is this normal lol

two little kids (2 and 5) never know what to do with them or how to fill the time. Everywhere is busy and expensive. But if you stay home it’s awful.

I feel like we are tying ourselves in knots a bit here to be honest. If I was having a fun day out I’d buy her lunch, but that’s expensive.

When mine were little we would do -
park
library
soft play
grandparents
kids am at cinema
local farm

i childminded during the week so weekends were a breeze

Thank you. It will get better I think (hope.) Every six months brings a shift.

If you are North Derbyshire i can recomend some places?

Sure, i don’t mind a drive

Op it will definitely get better. It shifted for me when you can have a proper conversation with them. So much better company and less lonely.

But for now is there anyone who could look after the kids for you for an hour (or three) once a month or something so you could get a little break?

I get it, OP. Looking after a 2-4 year old once from 6am to 7pm most days ( I worked 2 days p/w) was enough for me and we knew it would be, hence DH getting a vasectomy pretty sharpish.

Mine is 7 now, gets himself up in the morning. DH is away this weekend. We've been to B&M and the pet shop, I took him for lunch, we're going to play football in the park and then to the cinema (we have Limitless passes). But oh my word - I couldn't do this both weekend days, every day, by myself. I'm knackered after working all week - I wouldn't choose to be on the go for 12 hours. Eventually though they do get old enough to play Minecraft while you have a cup of tea.

Unfortunately not 😩 unless I paid and realistically I just can’t afford that.

Thanks @ConverselyAttired . I think this is why it’s fairly easy with just no1 as he will go off into soft play; the little one forces me in with her 😱 but it isn’t forever!

Ah shame. I think work on getting some play dates sorted when your eldest starts school or something as going to soft play, park etc. with another mum is so much more bearable!
But until then - solidarity. I honestly didn't enjoy it either. I love it now mine are older. Mine are 11 and 8 now!

I think it’s common to not love it. It’s hard work! I don’t know why some are acting like it’s such a shocking thing to admit!

I think it's just the relentlessness of it! Never time to switch off without feeling guilty! Try to enjoy the evenings!

Sending solidarity and totally understand where you’re coming from and that you’re not actually looking for suggestions. Mine are 5 and 3 and weekends are exhausting and often more hard work than working days. They wake up stupidly early and are soo energetic all day- constantly climbing things, making a mess and jumping on me. We do of course do lots of things- park, zoo, walks, garden play etc but it’s still exhausting and im constantly breaking up fights with them winding each other up and having to meet their constant demands of snacks, drinks, play with me etc. hopefully it gets easier and in a few years I might not be up at 5:45am! Love them very much and this age can be wonderful in many ways but it is hard work at the same time!

You have an unwell husband too?! You're in such a hard situation. I'm so sorry for you, Op.
My husband asked me today what I was planning for the weekend and I replied, "to have at least 2 hrs when dd isn't my responsibility." He agreed this was a reasonable ask and took her out to the park. He then came back and took a nap!
I don't think most people seem to understand how hard it is to not only entertain but be the sole carer for a 2-year-old never mind more kids especially when you'd need a lobotomy to enjoy doing the things they like!

And so much easier as you have a husband to share the load. To talk to. Etc

Op also has a husband but she shared that he was unwell after my post so I didn't know that when I posted.

Agree. My DCs are teens now but when they were little we went to parks A LOT. I don’t think there is a single play park within a 10 mile radius of our house that we haven’t been to, repeatedly. It’s free, and it’s a good way to break up the day and get out of the house for some fresh air, even for a short time. And my DCs used to really enjoy going.

I also used to struggle with staying around in the house all day on a weekend with young children, so solidarity with you OP. (I remember being slightly in awe/amazed when fellow parents would talk of lazy weekends around the house- maybe their kids were less demanding?! 😂)

It’s tough sometimes, but get outdoors as much as you can. Walks and hikes and bike rides and playgrounds are free and kids are always happier when active and outdoors. Try get a few weekend routines into place to make it easier because everyone knows what to expect. Pack picnics and snacks and flask of tea so you can save on restaurant and coffee shop bills when you’re out. And better yet, try do this with friends so the kids can play and the grown ups can chat and everyone has more fun.

She mentioned way earlier it was just her - sometime yesterday

You said, I have someone to talk to, OP has a husband to talk to although sadly sounds like he us too unwell to carry out a lot of the practical aspects. I don't know the exact set up though nor do you so can only go on what I read.

YANBU (although for some inexplicable reason I accidentally clicked on YABU)

I dread my colleague asking what plans I have for the weekend. I have several fatiguing health conditions so I generally try and do as little as possible at weekends, but everyone else seems to be out and about from 8.30am - midnight both weekend days living their best lives, while washing and drying my hair is a momental achievement

I get exactly what you mean. My DD is 3 and she's an absolute dream kid, but she's still a three year old and keeping her entertained while I try to catch up on laundry, a bit of DIY, maintain the gardens etc. is so difficult. I get her involved and we manage to have a lovely time for most of the day, but there are moments, on Saturdays in particular, where I find my fuse very short.
When I'm walking to and fro tidying up and she's following me singing the one verse from KPop Demon Hunters "Golden" that she knows for the fiftieth time that morning, it can make me feel quite depleted quite quickly.
But equally I know I'm an irritable person and the lament: "I just want to be able to get on!" is a frequent one! 🤣

She sounds she is on her own

but to me it was more your post saying weekends with my husband and children are stuff of dreams. And lots of we in your sentence.

op said yesterday she was on her own. And that weekends are long and lonely

not sure what is wrong with her dh (and sorry he is poorly op) but I don’t think she spends hours chatting to him

Colouring books or sticker books as a special treat on a weekend morning? If you have access to a printer at home or work you could print out some colouring pages. Definitely one or two regular TV shows. Kids are good with set routines so make yourselves a Saturday timetable. Do some things at home and some outside eg a nature walk. Take some photos. Ask the kids to draw things they saw when they get home. Make pancakes together and eat them. Make a den for them to play in with throw and cushions or use a box from the supermarket and cut an entrance.