Worried about my 18 year old son buying joke shirts from Afflecks Palace

[ForSparklyFatball]

Hi everyone, I’m after some advice because I’m really not sure if I’m overreacting or not. My son is 18 and has started going into Manchester at weekends with his university mates. They’ve been spending time in Afflecks Palace, which I know is full of alternative stalls, but he came back yesterday with a couple of t-shirts from the shop on the top floor that does the t-shirt printing.
One of them says “Don’t bully me, I’ll cum” and the other was along similar lines with crude sexual humour. He thought they were hilarious and just a bit of edgy fun, but I’m honestly concerned. At 18 he’s an adult, yet these kinds of slogans seem to normalise really objectifying and inappropriate attitudes, especially towards women and sex. I’ve tried speaking to him about it calmly, explaining why it bothers me, but he just laughed it off and said it’s only a joke.
Has anyone else come across these sorts of shirts in Afflecks or had their own son or daughter bring something similar home? Am I making too much of it, or is this worth having a firmer conversation about? Any thoughts on how to approach it without it escalating would be really helpful. Thanks.

Given some of the absolute nothing people get worked up over these days, it’s believable.

Humans find other humans sexually attractive shocker.

If human history had been full of mumsnet posters we wouldnt have made it out of the swamps

I'm not responding any more. I think it's horrible. He will get bored by it.

My favourite t shirt of the moment says “I’m brilliant and everyone else is a cunt”.

Im well over 50 and wear it to annoy my DH but also I think it’s hilarious. FWIW, I thought the MILF/frog T-shirt was quite funny.

@ForSparklyFatball I think it’s that you are seeing “your boy” transitioning into a young man with a bit of laddish-ness, in your eyes. Not easy but as PPs have said, he’s young and the more you clutch your pearls, the more he will push the boundaries. It’s how they learn.

And to be honest, I’ve seen a helluva lot worse on so called adult men.

Unfortunately yes, I was an goth growing up and had friends who's parents reacted in similar ways.
The ones who didn't comply are sadly no contact now.

@Devondevs @ChillingWithMySnowmies thank you for the education 😂. I’m clearly more Laura Ashley than Afflecks. Sorry you’re upset OP, it probably best to ignore it as a phase. Or ask him how he would feel if you got SILF tshirt (he’ll probably be grossed out).

Yep took my DD 14 who is now a goth!
She was a bit put out mummy was more goth at 14 than her 😂
She's at AP most weekends now.

Can't get on top floors anymore, even more of the building isn't safe

Don't care what they do in private
But not in my home
No way

And to be honest, I’ve seen a helluva lot worse on so called adult men

And I've seen a hell of a lot better. A lot better,

What do you mean @bafta16 ? Not being funny, I genuinely don’t know the point you are making?

I presume you do the washing for him? Just 'accidentally' bleach wash or shrink them.. ooops, sorry son.

And I liked Afflecks when I visited one afternoon, but no, didn't buy a dodgy t-shirt. Been around a long time.

@FionnulaTheCooler

I had “Too busy to FCUK” bought for me as a teen… By my Nan 😂 didn’t realise, bless her.

I mean saying " I've seen worse" is setting the bar low. I've seen better.

Nope. Absolutely no commas in there. Hes not asking for permission 😭

Either you’ve led an incredibly sheltered life or you’re trolling but this is hilarious. Please start an online petition and give people outside of mumsnet a laugh. Sincerely, a feminist who loves horror movies

Tell him you had one just like it when you were 15.

Ah ok. What I was meaning was OP’s lad is wearing t shirts that are really not that bad…I’ve seen plenty older men who should know better wearing worse.

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

TBF, he’d be really polite if he did.

I’m now imagining a Little Lord Faultneroy (? Spelling) character saying “mother, I’d like to fuck” and the mother saying “well that’s nice my boy, off you jolly well go”

I don't think you do understand the joke. It's making fun of people who would use MILF to objectify women.

@MiaKulper

😂 such a great response, he’d be scrambling for that receipt.

OP I think you have several issues. One is that you don’t believe your child is a man and think you can still make his choices for him. Second that you are upset by one of his choices, which you can express but shouldn’t expect any change if you do.

The biggest issue I can see is that you expect other women to police men. It is not our job and your son’s girlfriend is right to refuse you.

Its Afflecks palace its meant to be controversial
It was contriversial when i went throughhout the 90,s

I want to stop reading this but I don't have control of the TV right now and I've resorted to MN for entertainment before bed.

haha - I keep thinking about my MIL being so 'offended' by everything but saw a picture of her cooch practically hanging out of her bikini in the 60s and her whinging about her dad being so 'strict' and 'unfair'

I can't with it all!

Is the cafe still there?

This thread is making me so nostalgic for my Saturdays at Affleck’s 25 years ago 🥲 I miss that place so much!