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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Worried about my 18 year old son buying joke shirts from Afflecks Palace

442 replies

ForSparklyFatball · 14/05/2026 19:50

Hi everyone, I’m after some advice because I’m really not sure if I’m overreacting or not. My son is 18 and has started going into Manchester at weekends with his university mates. They’ve been spending time in Afflecks Palace, which I know is full of alternative stalls, but he came back yesterday with a couple of t-shirts from the shop on the top floor that does the t-shirt printing.
One of them says “Don’t bully me, I’ll cum” and the other was along similar lines with crude sexual humour. He thought they were hilarious and just a bit of edgy fun, but I’m honestly concerned. At 18 he’s an adult, yet these kinds of slogans seem to normalise really objectifying and inappropriate attitudes, especially towards women and sex. I’ve tried speaking to him about it calmly, explaining why it bothers me, but he just laughed it off and said it’s only a joke.
Has anyone else come across these sorts of shirts in Afflecks or had their own son or daughter bring something similar home? Am I making too much of it, or is this worth having a firmer conversation about? Any thoughts on how to approach it without it escalating would be really helpful. Thanks.

OP posts:
bafta16 · 14/05/2026 20:55

This 18 year old is OP's son. A person she has nurtured and loved for all these years.

No, it's not a pleasant slogan. But it will pass.

Devondevs · 14/05/2026 20:56

Gymnopediegivesmethewillies · 14/05/2026 20:54

I don’t get “don’t bully me, I’ll cum”. Is it a dom/sub reference, like if you’re cruel to me I’ll enjoy it?

Exactly that.

likelysuspect · 14/05/2026 20:56

ForSparklyFatball · 14/05/2026 20:39

Because it usually means a woman of a certain age.

A mum?

So ages from about 15 or 16 until infinity given you never stop being a mum

vanillachoc · 14/05/2026 20:56

bafta16 · 14/05/2026 20:55

This 18 year old is OP's son. A person she has nurtured and loved for all these years.

No, it's not a pleasant slogan. But it will pass.

clearly she doesn’t love him that much if she wants to make the lad homeless over a shirt

motorlady · 14/05/2026 20:56

ForSparklyFatball · 14/05/2026 20:18

I think they'd understand that in this day and age of women being assaulted, that showing those t shirts to impressionable boys is a very unwise thing to do. And if they don't listen, I can always start an online boycott.

Sadly women have always been assaulted. It’s nothing new. Whether someone wears a slogan T-shirt or not is not going to change things.

user1473878824 · 14/05/2026 20:56

I’m struggling to find the misogyny in “don’t bully me I’ll come” honestly

ForSparklyFatball · 14/05/2026 20:56

likelysuspect · 14/05/2026 20:56

A mum?

So ages from about 15 or 16 until infinity given you never stop being a mum

Just don't judge a woman on her looks. How hard is that?

OP posts:
bafta16 · 14/05/2026 20:56

vanillachoc · 14/05/2026 20:56

clearly she doesn’t love him that much if she wants to make the lad homeless over a shirt

More foolish ness. I give up.

HighLadyofTheNightCourt · 14/05/2026 20:57

ForSparklyFatball · 14/05/2026 20:53

Thank you for understanding. I cried last night about this. Xxx

This is joke right?

Gymnopediegivesmethewillies · 14/05/2026 20:57

ChillingWithMySnowmies · 14/05/2026 20:54

bingo :) its along the lines of Uwu type culture

Edited

Blimey I’m old, I have no idea what that means either, off to google.

not sure I’d walk round with a tshirt with the word cum on it to be honest but I can understand a teenage boy finding it hilarious!

ChillingWithMySnowmies · 14/05/2026 20:57

ForSparklyFatball · 14/05/2026 20:56

Just don't judge a woman on her looks. How hard is that?

what are you on about?

the only qualifier of 'milf' is having children.

Okiedokie123 · 14/05/2026 20:58

@ForSparklyFatball I agree with you fwiw. I’m surprised at how many of the comments on your thread think this is ok tbh.

ChillingWithMySnowmies · 14/05/2026 20:59

Gymnopediegivesmethewillies · 14/05/2026 20:57

Blimey I’m old, I have no idea what that means either, off to google.

not sure I’d walk round with a tshirt with the word cum on it to be honest but I can understand a teenage boy finding it hilarious!

haha.. careful.

basically its the idea that the person wearing it is submissive, and gets a kick out of people bullying/being mean to them.

It's mostly worn by gay men in my personal experience.

likelysuspect · 14/05/2026 20:59

I hope Ben Affleck doesnt get the hump with this thread.

user1473878824 · 14/05/2026 20:59

ForSparklyFatball · 14/05/2026 19:59

Because it makes light of bullying. And the other one he bought was "MILF" and "Fentanyl" in the design of Fanta!

Also sorry an 18 year old man wearing a MILF t shirt is quite funny

vanillachoc · 14/05/2026 21:00

bafta16 · 14/05/2026 20:56

More foolish ness. I give up.

i’m going to wear my milf shirt tonight

Devondevs · 14/05/2026 21:00

Gymnopediegivesmethewillies · 14/05/2026 20:57

Blimey I’m old, I have no idea what that means either, off to google.

not sure I’d walk round with a tshirt with the word cum on it to be honest but I can understand a teenage boy finding it hilarious!

I wouldn’t Google it if I were you. You’ll end up down an internet rabbit hole there’s no coming back from.

bafta16 · 14/05/2026 21:00

ChillingWithMySnowmies · 14/05/2026 20:57

what are you on about?

the only qualifier of 'milf' is having children.

No ,it's not, It's horrible. It's an older woman who has still got it and I wouldn't mind giving her one.

it's vile.

ForSparklyFatball · 14/05/2026 21:00

ChillingWithMySnowmies · 14/05/2026 20:57

what are you on about?

the only qualifier of 'milf' is having children.

Well no, it means Mother, I'd like to F""""

OP posts:
Grammarnut · 14/05/2026 21:00

over reaction. I wors see-thru dresses when I was 18. My father was incandescent. I still wore them.

JLou08 · 14/05/2026 21:00

ForSparklyFatball · 14/05/2026 20:06

MILF is offensive and sexist.

My mates called my dad a DILF when I was a teen. Were they being sexist?
You're massively overreacting, and given your attitude on here I'm surprised this is the worst he's done to rebel against such uptight parenting.

CoralOP · 14/05/2026 21:01

Does anyone actually beleive this is real?...

JudgeJ · 14/05/2026 21:01

itsmeits · 14/05/2026 20:05

They have a GILF one 😂
So maybe be happy he's only after the mums and not the grannies

Confront him about what?
All he will do is by more!

Not Grandads then? I'm impressed that Afflecks is still going!

user1473878824 · 14/05/2026 21:01

ForSparklyFatball · 14/05/2026 20:09

Well I have had bad experiences with men in the past. I've had therapy, but that does trigger me.

You are projecting so much onto joke t shirts.

JudgeJ · 14/05/2026 21:02

CoralOP · 14/05/2026 21:01

Does anyone actually beleive this is real?...

Sadly, yes I think it is, it's typical MN territory!