You seem to be asking something that I answered in my original post – the post you commented on, but clearly didn’t read – but to answer you again: no. No, I don’t believe that if they earn more then they are entitled to more money in a relationship. And that’s the key word really, ‘relationship’. Partnership. Unit. Family.
Money is not the only thing that someone can contribute to a relationship or any situation when it comes to family. There are things like childcare, looking after the house and generally being part of an entity we call a family or a couple. Love.
Deciding that money is the most important thing – and that is what you do when you highlight the earning power of one of other(s) - creates an unfair dynamic and it also disregards contributions to a unit that are not financial.
And, as I said in my first post (which you didn’t read), I’ve often wondered in these relationships what that person does with their money. Do they go on better holidays? Do they go out more? Have more activities? Better gadgets?Do they wear better clothes? Do they lord it over their poorer partner while the lower earning partner has to struggle by?
It seems bizarre and rather cruel.
I earn considerably more than my partner earns. Indeed, I earn considerably more than some of my friends earn. But my partner and those friends are all better educated than me. I just about got a poor degree while they have masters or PhD‘s; and the work they do is far, far, more beneficial to society and the world than what I do. But they work for charities or in education or the arts or healthcare or mental health, some work in research and some battle climate change and save nature. They do wonderful, inspirational, useful, beneficial things. And, as is usually the case in this world, they get paid bugger all for it. I stumbled into the corporate world and make far more than they do. I do nothing beneficial for society and, frankly, my job isn’t hugely demanding or hard. You don’t need to have worked hard at school or university, and you don’t need to be caring or particularly clever. But, because the outcome of what I do is money (profit for the company), I get paid reasonably well. Because the outcome of the work my partner and friends do is healthier, happier, better people or nature or whatever, their work haemorrhages money and they get paid awfully. If I was as clever and talented and hard working as them, I would change careers immediately. My job satisfaction is limited, but at least I get paid ok. And in being paid ok it means that my partner doesn’t need to earn as well. Because we are a couple, a family, a unit, and so we have shared aims and we support each other. And, beyond any financial contribution, my partner puts an awful lot into our family that is worth far more than money.
Yet, people, like you, think that I should reward myself and punish my partner by keeping my hard earned dough?! How small minded and mean.
Again, I ask what do these higher earners do with the money they keep? My investment, my joy, is my family. And so of course we pool our resources.