To not reprimand staff for not smiling?

[squashedalmondcroissant]

I work as a manager in a catering/hospitality business, small local chain.

I had a call from a senior staff member about a negative review we were given online that essentially said they didn’t feel that the staff member on duty (not me) was smiley enough. I have now been tasked with pulling up this staff member on this.

I am very much not someone who is easily offended or quick to jump to misogyny but something about this feels..irritating to me. (The person complaining was a man and all the staff are women). They didn’t say the staff were rude, unpleasant or ignored them, just that were weren’t smiley and ‘welcoming’. I know the staff member and they are always polite and helpful but they do have a bit of a ‘resting bitch face’ when not intentionally grinning like a Cheshire Cat!

Something about this is rubbing me up the wrong way. It seems the main complaint is the staff not smiling while doing her job perfectly competently. Should I reprimand her for this? I understand that when customer facing sometimes you need to fake it a bit but is just her natural face position so offensive to someone that she should be forced to plaster on a fake smile? I’m torn!

I honestly don't understand why single reviews are taken so seriously. You've had one single review about this issue. If no one else has taken the trouble of writing a review about this, it's fair to assume that the vast majority of clients are happy with the welcome given them. There's really no need to pander to every single negative review, which is highly subjective anyway.

I think in your shoes I would try to subtly watch her interact with a few customers and assess objectively whether she comes across as welcoming overall - leaving aside the specific smiling issue.

If she does then I’d say this complaint is a one off and leave it. But it’s worth a look to see if there is an overall way she comes across that could be worked on.

Actually no - a lot of people who are unhappy cba to post a review.

I read something about the ‘Gen Z Stare’. If it is true then it looks like we all need to get used to less than friendly staff!

The OP admits the woman has RBF. That can come across as unfriendly. There is an expression and tone that is welcoming and that doesn’t sound like it.

However OP is choosing to assume the customer is a misogynist. It’s certainly an interesting way to manage somewhere

Your smiling complaint reminded me....

I had a very high-profile customer on a call, ask me to get around a payment he was obliged to make. I was perfectly polite, explained why I couldn't and offered an alternative (which admittedly he would have still had to pay, but a little less money), wrapped up the call and got on with my day.

About an hour later, the MD came down to our floor in a flap and took my very confused manager aside to have a word with her.

It turned out that the high-profile customer had called the complaints department and created a right stink until he could speak to the MD, told him that I had an 'unsmiling voice' and a very negative attitude that came across over the phone.

He framed it as 'feedback', but kept saying things like 'she's the contact point for your company, she represents you, if I were in your shoes, I would have a long think about how you are being represented'.... and so on.

I was so damn lucky because we didn't have working call recording at the time, but my manager happened to be live listening in and was sitting with me during the call, as part of our monthly quality review. (back in the old days when you used to jack in to the phones and a double headset to live listen)

She confirmed that his 'unsmiling voice and negative attitude' was inherently subjective and influenced by the outcome of the call. I remember that she went on to say that she didn't believe the complaint reflected a failure in service delivery, but a misdirected unhappiness with the call's unavoidable outcome.

He didn't like the outcome of his escalation to the MD and absolutely threw his toys out of the pram, and it became very obvious that it wasn't a legitimate complaint but entirely retaliatory because somebody had said a very mild and very customer-focused 'no' to him.

Very nearly got me fired, from a job I really needed to make ends meet, for just not liking a fully appropriate customer-focused 'no'

Well, I cant help thinking of the hilarious quip which goes something like 'punishments Will continue until happiness improves'😱🤣

Only at Christmas were we forced to smile (hospitality 2001 - 2012:)
Up
I even got an award from the hotel group for going to work with a sore throat in 2003

Beatings will continue until morale improves

I find this attitude very irritating actually, when staff do their job in a way that feels like they're doing you a favour. They might serve you with no attitude to make you feel happy to buy there instead of elsewhere, like asking for anything else feels like you're disturbing them.

I might be old school but people in any type of customer service should be approachable, pleasant to talk to, willing to help, and - in a single word - make you feel WELCOME. They should prefer to hire people like this, with a positive attitude to people. They are paid for this, to offer a service, not just to handle stuff.

I hate when I go to buy a coffee for example, and there's no warm human interaction. I also think that for people working there it makes your day better if you feel that your job makes customers happy.

In a hotel especially, when you walk into a reception, the first impression is fundamental. A warm welcome and the degree of service they are happy to offer make the difference between a cheap place and a five star hotel.

I think it's not fawning, it's being professional, and part of the profession in hospitality is offering a friendly welcoming, make your day special, a place to remember, and what you will mainly remember is not the beds or furniture but how you have been treated overall.

I'm sorry but I don't understand why it is so difficult to encourage your stuff to make clients feel that you are happy to see them, and do the work for them, you are there exactly for this. It's called hospitality business for a reason.

I think it's part of the training and it's not humiliation to make a client feel you're happy to serve them. I understand some might take advantage but there are ways to dismiss such clients.
Possibly you must have a love for people to work in hospitality, a certain type of personality.

Rather than reprimanding I would call it training your staff to offer the best unforgettable service in the business hospitality.

This:

We've got to a stage where people are so frequently making excuses for others dis-social or unpleasant behaviour that you're made to feel like someones done you a huge favour just by considering others; having some manners or acting in a professional manner.

Then we wonder why everyone seems antisocial and entitled and it's because of this slow erosion of expectations over the last decade or so.

No reminder required,I find the expectation by men for women to smile at them bloody weird. They are positively raging if you don't fake laugh at their cringe jokes too

This isn’t gender related in the slightest and ridiculous to say it is

anyone man or woman in a customer facing role is expected to be welcoming and engaging that includes body language and facial expressions

Isn’t it basic manners to smile when you greet someone, though, whether you are in a customer facing role or just saying hello to an acquaintance in the street!

People don’t have to walk around with a fixed grin on their face all day, but I would expect, if greeted by anyone in a shop or hospitality setting, male or female, for them to smile as they did so, or at the very least to not have a scowl/sullen/miserable look on their face 🤷‍♀️

Or an entitled dick owner who thinks he has the right to dictate what you do with your own face.

And it is very cultural, as in different cultures have different rules for interaction. We all know how in the US it would be considered rude to not say “have a nice day” in so many settings. In France the Brits perceive rudeness. The French seem to think it is rude when we do not enter an establishment saying “bonjour’. I have been in Croatia several times. The first time was when it was still Yugoslavia, most recently in 2019. I recall feeling like I had offended those who were serving me. No smiles or small talk at all.

So I get that it doesn’t come naturally to some people. This is learned behavior. Sadly in hospitality part of the job is to try to make people feel welcome.

To the OP I think I would raise the issue at staff meeting/training level. Talk about what makes the establishment special and welcoming. Once you have highlighted the behaviors you want from staff you have a way to give feedback.

I don't see the comment as showing teeth, more of an approach, so not as warm as you'd expect perhaps.