AIBU to find constant hugging and saying ‘I love you’ unprofessional? (At work)

[theodextrey]

I work with this woman who is quite extroverted she enjoys hugging everyone daily (usually full frontal) and will say “I love you” to coworkers.

These people aren’t anyone she’s known a long time, I’ve worked there longer than her & she does this with almost everyone including new hires.

I am more introverted/quiet so these interactions make me feel kinda strange. To me, I only say I love you to people I am close to so I don’t understand it (I am on the spectrum)

We will be on group email or text and she will sign off “I love you!!! 🩷🩷🩷”

i know people are different but to me this seems inappropriate for the workplace (corporate) and makes me feel uncomfortable.
this woman will also disappear frequently throughout the day while she’s stopping and chatting with people (usually small talk that goes on too long)

is this unprofessional or am I being unreasonable?

I also want to add it makes me uncomfortable because if I’m standing there (we work on a team of two) while she’s hugging the coworkers, they then try to hug me, which I’m not a fan of, but it would make me seem cold in contrast to her for me to not participate.

It’s weird, boring and immature. Oh and performative. She doesn’t “love them”. It’s her need for attention and adoration. I always view people like that with a lens of suspicion.

I would hate this but I would put up with it because it takes all kinds. I guess.

I have a lady I deal with over email at work who is like this, she is so over the top in her enthusiasm and how wonderful everything in.

I think half of her sentences end with exclamation points, and she has a fancy signature line that says something like "Be Open, Be Enthusiastic, Be Kind." Which makes me want to be sick.

But I figure I am basically a curmudgeon, so maybe we need people like that to balance out the world-vibes.

Funny you mention exclamation points, this woman also uses too many 😂

Flipping eck! I sympathise. I love a nice hug but only with v close friends/family.....I'd feel so awkward having this foisted upon me 🫨😱

Shes fun and happy, she means no harm!

Unwanted physical contact, especially in a professional setting? Not fun.

Highly unprofessional, childish and irritating. I would hate this at work.

@TempestTost I’m with you in the curmudgeon camp - that email sign off would make me vomit.

Exactly - why does someone being a “hugger” give them licence to touch people who don’t want it? And at work, FFS.

It's not you being on the spectrum. I'm not on the spectrum afaik but this behaviour would drive me mad! I have never worked with anyone who did this, it's not common behaviour I don't think

Bizzare! It’s really inappropriate. I’ve got close to colleagues in the past but hugs are reserved for maybe when someone is back from holiday, is leaving or a birthday. And that’s only with good friends. Have a laugh, be friendly but I hate all the over emoting rubbish. It’s usually faked anyway!

I started a new job a few weeks ago. When one of the sales reps visited the office, he told me to stand up and then gave me a massive hug. I felt very unhappy afterwards. He isn’t a creep but it overstepped my boundaries. I was sexually assaulted repeatedly as a teenager, so I have been working on my self esteem and trying to stand up for myself. It took me back to square one when he did that. I felt silly and powerless. I was thinking afterwards how could I have dealt with it differently. I’m worried it will become a regular thing when he comes into the office.

I would keep to the good morning greetings in email. I couldn’t be doing with all that performative lovey doveyness. Keep your boundaries firm. I’d feel good about the fact she doesn’t do it to me, it means I’m giving off a ‘you don’t fool me’ vibe.

I avoid people who are ‘luv you hun’ types (and I’m NT).